But...that would involve getting on a big boat. We've invented airplanes now, that get you there faster.
"But they have beaches. You can lie in the sun."
"Um...we have beaches in Florida."
"Cuba has some of the greatest architectural masterpieces in the world."
"Can't go, American citizens aren't allowed."
"What about history? Columbus, pirates, Haitian voodoo, Ricky Ricardo...."
"Yeah, about that. Antiquated sodomy laws left over from the British Empire, some of the worst homophobia in the world..."
So I won't be going to the Caribbean anytime soon. But in case you do, here are some public penises to look out for.
2. Jamaica is known for its reggae music, its Rastafarians, and its intense homophobia (usually ignored in the travel ads). And in Emancipation Park, one of the most nude of the nude statues of ex-slaves. A symbol of freedom.
In downtown Port-au-Prince, this memorial to the Unknown Slave shows a muscleman blowing a conch shell.
5. Moving east to the Dominican Republic, the capital city of Santo Domingo features a surprising aquamarine statue of Enriquillo, the Taino Indian who rebelled against the Spanish from 1519 to 1533.
More after the break.
8. There's another in Frederiksted. on St. Croix (American Virgin Islands).
It was installed by British artist Jason de Caires Taylor in 2012. I don't know why.
12. Working westward, we finally reach Curacao, a former Dutch colony that gained independence in 2010. Dutch is still the most common language, along with the creole Papiamento. The Tula Monument commemorates a slave who led a rebellion against the Dutch in 1795.
See also: The Top 12 Public Penises of South America; and The Top 12 Public Penises of Central America.