Dec 21, 2014

The Biggest and Smallest Penises in the World

I'm sure you've seen the famous World Map of the Penis, which lists the average size of men in every country in the world.  I'm not sure how reliable the data is, since there's such a wide variability, but it's interesting to note that American men end up around average, at 5.6", Russian men a little smaller, at 5'2" (Sorry, Yuri), and Italian men smaller still, at 4.9"

I checked some nude and basket-heavy photos of men from the countries with the biggest and smallest average sizes, to see if the difference was noticeable.

(The penises are censored, but you can still get a good idea of the sizes).

The biggest come from about where you'd expect, sub-Saharan Africa and South America.

1. The Congo, 7.1" That's rather an under-estimate.  Maybe this guy took a dip in any icy stream before going in for his measurements.

2. Ecuador, 6.9"(left). Doesn't look like this guy measures up.  But his muscles definitely make it worth the trip.

3. Colombia, 6.7"  Nelson Gutierrez Cuellar (top photo), an engineering student and third runner up in the Mr. Universe Model competition in 2011, is very attractive, but apparently a little disappointing beneath the belt.

4-5. Ghana and Venezuela, 6.7"

6. Lebanon, 6.6"  Ali Hammoud, runner up to Mr. Lebanon 2012 and Mr. International 2013, was actually born in Syria, so he might not count.  I'm not really seeing 6.6".  Or 5.6".  Or....

7. Hungary, 6'5" (left). Keep on pumping iron, kid.  Your greatest gifts to the world are your chest and abs.

8-10. Belgium, Greece, Morocco, tie at 6'4"

Well, that was disappointing.   Let's try the "smallest" guys in the world, working down from #10.  They're mostly in East and Southeast Asia.

More after the break.

10. Malaysia, 4.4"  Maybe twice that!  Obviously this delegate to Manhunt International wasn't in the research sample.

9. India, 4.3" (left). No way this guy is 4.3"! And he was the smallest I could find.  Honest!

8-6. Sri Lanka, Japan, China, ties at 4.3"

5-4. Taiwan and Philippines, ties at 4.2"  Now I understand why my old roommate Huang, a Formosan aboriginal, was so proud of his +++-size.

3. Cambodia, 4.0"  Are you kidding? I'm running out of black pixels to censor the private parts.

2. Thailand, 4.0" Direk Sindamrongsi, who won Mr. Thailand, but failed to place in the 2011 Mister International competition, doesn't seem to have any photos in underwear or a swimsuit. Maybe because this one is accurate?

1. Korea, 3.8"  Reputedly the smallest in the world.  But nobody told Korean bodybuilder Lane Seungcheol.  I'm certain that the 165 on his posing strap stands for "165 millimeters" (6.4 inches).

I guess in-group variability is greater than out-group variability.

Or in layman's terms, there are plenty of big and small guys in every country in the world.

See also: The Truth about the Formosan Penis; and 6000 Words for Penis; and The Biggest Sausages I've Ever Cooked (no, it's not really about sausages).