Yuri and some of his advanced students are in Iceland, researching the impact of global climate change on the aurora borealis, and I flew out for a visit.
We're at lunch at a gay restaurant called Jomfruin, about a block from the harbor, when a local guy named Bjorn asks to join us.
It's not just a gay thing: in Iceland, it's commonplace for strangers to walk up to you and ask to join your group.
Bjorn is a film studies major at the University of Iceland: in his early 20s, shorter than me and rather buffed, with nice hard biceps, thick hair cut in an old-fashioned 1950s style, and a cute East London accent (maybe he learned English from watching EastEnders). He wears glasses and is constantly attached to his smartphone.
Bjorn has been cruising Yuri rather blatantly, and ignoring me. In the hopes of deflecting his attention or at least being invited to "share," I've been trying to wow him with celebrity dating stories (Nate Richert, Gregg Sulkin, Dylan O'Brien). That doesn't work, so I shift to enormous beneath the belt gifts: the Satyr, who had 12 inches.
"12 inches? Is that all?" Bjorn scoffs. "I can do more than that. My first time was with a guy who had 16 inches!"
"16 inches! That's impossible!" I say. "Porn star John Holmes had only 13 inches."
"I've been with many guys," Yuri says, acting as my wing man. "Some of them very big -- like Boomer. But only one time did I find a guy with 13 inches. 16, no way!"
"It was with my teacher at the gymnasium," Bjorn says.
The full story, with nude photos and sexual situations, is on Tales of West Hollywood.