Nov 9, 2016

The Romanian Twink at the Gay Asian Bar

West Hollywood, November 8, 1988.

It was Election Day: George Bush, the Vice President of homophobia for the last eight years, vs. Michael Dukakis, who hated gay people and was a fierce opponent of gay adoption.

I was depressed over my doctoral dissertation, my ever-mounting collection of bills, and my lack of a boyfriend, so there was no point in getting even more depressed.  Instead of voting, I went to Mugi, the bar for Asian guys and their admirers.

It was not crowded on a Tuesday night, with most American citizens home watching the election returns: a few Asian guys clustered together on one side of the bar, a couple of regular admirers, Creepy Old Guys who leered and got drunk but never cruised anyone.

And a twinks: short, slim, rather feminine, with a cute round face, a square chin, and prominent eyebrows, standing by the bar with a beer bottle propped up like an erect penis.  Cruising me with a sultry stare.

I was there to meet Asian guys, not a twink who looked like he just walked out of the Rage, so I gave him Attitude.

But he didn't catch on; he sauntered up to me with a broad smile and held out his hand.  "Allo, I am Stash (stesh) from Romania (Romen-ia)."

Romanian was the only Romance language spoken in Eastern Europe, descended from the Latin of the Roman legionnaires.  Incomprehensible to speakers of Spanish and French: lots of Slavic words, strange diacritical marks.

I want to eat your sausage.
French: Je veux manger ta saucisse
Romanian: Eu vreau să mănânc cârnați ta

Now I definitely wanted to talk to him!

"You have very big muscle (mooshl)," Stash continued as we shook hands. "Do you study karate?"

"No, I just work out.  I studied judo in school."

"Judo!  You are from Japon?"

The full story, with nude photos and sexual situations, is on Tales of West Hollywood.