Robert Aramayo: A gay psycho, a queerbaiting Elf, conversion therapy, Tourette's Syndrome, and a lot of n*de scenes. With the biggest d*cks in Europe

 

 

Link to the n*de dudes

Alfie Williams posted a photo with Robert Aramayo, who won twice at the 2026 BAFTA awards.  I never heard of him, but Alfie always buddies up to gay guys or guys who have played prominent gay roles, so it's time to do some research.

A promising start: Aramayo is n*ked a lot, with countless backside shots and at least one on-screen d*ck.  

He was born in 1992 in Kingston-upon-Hull, Yorkshire.  He is of English and Basque ancestry, giving me an opportunity to write about the Basque language.

Basque, spoken in northeastern Spain and southeastern France,  is not related to any other language on the face of the Earth.  It is the original language of the people who occupied the Iberian Peninsula, so old that some of its words come from the Stone Age:

Knife is labana, stone-that-cuts.  Roof is teilatu, top-of-the-cave

I find that fascinating.  Who wouldn't find that fascinating?

Ok, how about this: The Basque word for man is gizon, which is similar to the phrase big p*nis (giz lun) in ancient Sumerian.  And the p*nises of Basque men are among the biggest in the world, topping the already-impressive 13.5 cm average of the rest of Spain.  Did the Sumerians know something? 

Back to Aramayo: he performed in youth theater throughout his childhood, and received a BFA from the Julliard School in 2015.

Question 1: Any gay roles?

He started his on-screen career playing straight characters in Harley and the Davidsons (2016), and Game of Thrones (2016-2017).  

I figured that Galveston (2018) would be about Piers Galveston (1284-1312), the boyfriend of the future King Edward II, but it's about the city in Texas:  A dying hitman (Ben Foster) is returning to his hometown to meet the Girl of His Dreams.

In Stray Dolls (2020),  Indian immigrant Riz works in a hotel where she meets Dallas (Robert).  They plan a robbery together.  He shows his backside, but it's still heteronormative af.

How about Behind Her Eyes (2021), a psychological horror movie about a three-way love triangle? Louise falls in love with her boss, David (Tom Bateman) and befriends his wife.  Uh-oh. Robert plays her friend from the mental hospital.  He notes that he "prefers c*cks," and brags that he hooked up with one of the male nurses   In a Big Reveal ending, we discover that he switched bodies with the wife so he could get with David.  

That sounds a bit homophobic, promoting the idea that gay men are really trans women.

More after the break

I reviewed the first episode of Lord of the Rings: Rings of Power (2022-24), but didn't like it. Who wants to watch the soap-opera shenanigans of the beings that the hobbits worship as gods?

Robert appears later as Elrond, the son of Earendil and a mortal woman.  Earendil, who Bilbo Baggins sings about?

Eärendil was a mariner that tarried in Arvernien;

He built a boat of timber felled in Nimbrethil to journey in;

Elrond is the herald and speech-writer of Gil-Galad. Gods need speech writers? Come on, Sam sings about him:

His sword was long, his lance was keen,

his shining helm afar was seen;

the countless stars of heaven's field

were mirrored in his silver shield.

Could we go back to the length of his sword?

For the first season, Elrond is the gay bff of Galadriel, "the mightiest and fairest of the Elves."  He befriends the Dwarf Durin, causing fans to anticipate a romance, but it's all queerbaiting.  In the second season, he kisses Galadriel, but marries her daughter.  

First homophobia, and now queerbaiting. Curioser and curioser

Lillies Not for Me (2024): In the 1920s, aspiring novelist Owen James (Fionn O'Shea) begins a medical treatment to "cure" him of being gay.   Philip Fairfax (Robert, right) and Charles (Louis Hoffman, above) are figures from his past whose lives intertwine with his "therapy."

Homophobia, queerbaiting, and now conversion therapy?  At least the movie is opposed to it, but how about playing an open, out, non-angst-ridden gay guy for a change?  Imagine the impact this constant agony has on the 15-year olds in the audience (the movie has an 18 Certification in Britain, but that never stopped a bloke who wanted to see some d*cks)

Question 2: Is Robert gay in real life?

He doesn't discuss his personal life, and his social media is empty, which suggests gay identity.  But he was asked in an interview how he managed to play a gay character.  He said he doesn't care, "love is love." But if he was gay, he would never have been asked in the first place. So I'm going to go with straight.

The BAFTA Awards: Robert won Rising Star and Best Actor in a Leading Role -- two Baftas in one night -- for I Swear (2025), a biography of Tourette's Syndrome advocate John Davidson,  John was at the awards ceremony, and got in trouble for n-word verbal tics, even though they are unintentional and do not reference his actual beliefs -- that's the whole point of his activism.

See also: Connor Newall: The Hottest Property in Fashion buddies with Alfie Williams, models in homoerotic ads, plays gay guys, shows his....

"28 Days Later: The Bone Temple": A cured zombie, the Devil's son, a Jimmy cult, musclemen,  and 8 gay actors.

"The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power": Elves, Humans, and Proto-Hobbits Face Off against the Dark Lord

6000 Ways to Say "P*nis"