"Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse": How Is This Not a Coming-Out Movie?

Spider-Man, introduced in 1962, was one of the first in Marvel Comics' stable of flawed superheroes, a welcome counterpart to DC's indefatigibly stalwart square-jaws:  high schooler Peter Parker is bitten by a radioactive spider, gets spider-powers, and doesn't know how to save the world while negotiating teen angst.  Many high schoolers in the Vietnam-Nixon-Kent State era could relate.

Since then Spidey has spun off into comic books, movies, a tv series, a Broadway show, and dozens of "what if?" alternatives, some of whom come together in the gay symbolism-packed Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse.

In a trippy near-Earth,  Miles Morales (voiced by Shameik Moore, top photo) is a outsider (gay) kid, obsessed with comic books, street art, and his hero, Spider-Man.

His (homophobic) straight-laced father, police officer Jefferson Davis (Bryan Tyree Henry) doesn't like (gay people) Spider-Man.

Time out:  who decided to name a black guy after the President of the Confederacy?

Miles (realizes that he's gay) is bit by a radioactive spider, joins a gym (gets muscular overnight), and excretes sticky webs  (you figure it out).

He sneaks out to visit his Uncle Aaron (Mahershala Ali, who played a gay character in Green Book and the father of a gay kid in Moonlight).

Aaron is estranged from Dad because he's (gay) a screw-up.  He gives Miles lessons on how to talk to girls (guys): hand on shoulder, intense gaze, sultry "Hey."

Spider-Man dies, and Miles must take his place.  He negotiates high school, not telling anyone that he is (gay) the new Spider-Man, wishing that he wasn't the only (gay person) Spider-Man in the world.

Due to a space-time vortex created by the (heteronormative) Big Bad, Spider-People living in alternate worlds  are swept away from home and  end up in Miles' world.

Miles bonds with Peter B. Parker (Jake Johnson), a middle-aged Spider-Man who married his girlfriend Mary Jane, but now is divorced because he is (gay) a screw-up.

The other (gay people) Spider-People include Gwen Stacey, a (lesbian) female Spider-Man; Spider-Man Noir, from a film noir world; Peter Porker, aka Spider-Ham; and Peni Parker, a girl from a distant future world.

The  (gay club) secret Spider-Man group works together to defeat the (heteronormative) Big Bad and (assimilate) get back to their home dimensions.

Miles now accepts his role as a Spider-Man (gay person).  Still in disguise, he rushes up and hugs his Dad, who is shocked by his (gay) affection. Dad says "I don't approve of your (lifestyle) methods, but I respect you."

Miles concludes:  "When I feel alone, like no one understands what I'm going through (as a gay teen), I remember my friends who get it. I never thought I'd be able to do any of this stuff, but I can. Anyone can (be gay) wear the mask. You could (be gay) wear the mask. If you didn't know that before, I hope you do now. Because I'm (gay)  Spider-Man. And I'm not the only one. Not by a long shot."

Searching for Gay Characters in Comics in 2019

Heartened by the gay-friendiness of Welcome to Wanderland, I went to my local comic book store and picked up a pile ...um, I mean went to Comixology and downloaded the digital versions of six comic books that they recommended.   As usual, I was looking for gay characters, or at least gay subtexts, but beefcake would do in a pinch.

1. Amazing Age: "Sam Charleston is a normal kid who likes hanging out with his best friends Mike and Violet. However, a tragic event drives the trio apart and they navigate their high school lives without each other. That is until one day when one of Sam's old childhood comics mysteriously appears and brings the friends back together in an unexpected way."

Opening scene: they're writing a superhero comic.  Mike wants his character to "get a lady."  Not a good sign!

Then Sam's Dad dies, and he goes over to the dark side, becoming a juvenile delinquent.  Five years later, Violet is a punk, Mike is a jock, and they hate each other.

Sam passes out in class, and awakens as a character in his comic book, Amazing Age.

The end.  Why are these comics so short?  You barely get the premise.

Gay characters: None specified.  Mike wants "a lady."  I assume that Sam wants one, too.

2. Book of Monsters #1 - Alone: "Stories have long been told of the Pied Piper who leads kids through the deepest and darkest parts of the forest. But what happens when the children he is leading lose their way?"

The older teen's shirt reveals half of his chest on thecover, but nothing inside - a deliberate attempt to draw in readers with the promise of beefcake.

The kids lost in the woods fight troll-monsters who have a problem with personal pronouns: "Find own meat!  This mine!"  It gets old fast.

I'm much more interested in the Pied Piper than some dumb monster-battle, but he doesn't appear at all.

Gay characters: None specified.

3. Miskatonic High: "Five teens take on H.P. Lovecraft's monsters and their small-town high school ... They're just not sure which is worse."  Didn't know what to expect.

First scene: We open in media res at a Breakfast Club-like detention.  A discussion of nose-picking.  It can only go downhill

The five kids,   bookworm Simon, jock Matt , and three girls (Alex, Ren, Sarah), are performing required community service as their punishment, when they are zapped into the ancient world and fight an tentacled monster.

Yawn.  Not another monster battle!

Gay characters: Matt gets a girl.  I can't figure out if Simon is gay or just sophisticated.

4. Offbeats: "It's Tintin meets Tarantino in this 1950's crime noir! A young man tries to save a woman from a vicious street gang, but ends up needing to be rescued by a petty crook who introduces him to a whole new world!"

Next Issue: Booker and Jim rescue a missing dancer, but end up being betrayed. The cops hand Jim over to a local mob boss who offers to free him in exchange for betraying Booker -- who mounts a daring raid to rescue his new friend."

I was sold by the promise buddy bonding, but it was all a tease.  Jim is obsessed over his girlfriend, Booker has a wife, and they inhabit a world full of strippers and hookers.

5. Planet of the Nerds: "Three high school jocks in the 1980s are accidentally frozen by an experimental cryogenics device, only to be revived in the computer-driven, superhero movie-loving world of 2019, an era ruled by nerds!"

I chose Issue #4 because of the naked jock on the cover (top photo):  "Feeling like misfits in 2019, the thawed-out jocks from the '80s hatch a plan for revenge on the rich and powerful nerd who froze them."

No, they don't.  They break into his house, only to be stopped by his private security guards.

The cover picture does not appear in the story: the thawed-out jocks are staying with Steve's ex-girlfriend Jennie, who has aged 30 years, but Steve still feels that it's his duty to have sex with her (she refuses).

Fortunately for him, because he can now come out as gay (which is ok in 2019).  That's the end of the nudity.

I like the jocks' horror at the dystopian society they've awakened to:  We have Nazis again, Donald Trump is president, Prince is dead, Kirk Cameron is a religious cultist and Bill Cosby is a felon. 

Postscript: In Issue #5, they confront the evil scientist cum Nazi who accidentally froze them, and Steve gets a boyfriend.  Fade out kiss and everything.

Gay characters: Two

6. Rex Radley, Boy Adventurer: "Rex Radley is an 11 year old boy born into excitement! His mom pilots a giant robot and fights towering monsters! His dad has a cavewoman bodyguard and defends the planet from an army of dinosaur men! The Adventure never stops for Rex!"

So Jonny Quest without Dad's life partner Race Bannon, or his own life partner Hadji.  Sounds awful.

Rex does seem awfully mature for 11; I would have guessed 16.  But he has no friends his own age, and the adults are almost all women: Mom, his aunt, and Dad's companion:  a cavewoman who doesn't know how to use personal pronouns "Been long time since Tharga ate dinosaur."

Come on, personal pronouns are easy.  Repeated after me: Ego, yo, eu, je, Ich, wo.  And everybody knows that humans and dinosaurs never co-existed.

Gay characters:  None specified.

1 out of 6, not a great score.  I think I'll stick to Kevin Keller.

See also: Welcome to Wanderland