The Best Half of "The Half of It"

Netflix gives The Half of It has a 97% match, based on what I usually watch.  Shy, lonely outsider Ellie agrees to Cyrano de Bergerac dumb jock Paul by writing love letters to The Girl, whom Ellie is secretl in love with, too.  The trailer shows Ellie staring folornly at the couple through windows a lot, playing the cello, bonding with Paul, and staring forlornly at the couple some more.  The tagline: "Not every love story is a romance."

Scene 1:  Ellie is,,, you know what?  I don't feel like wading through all the "shy, lonely outsider" gay teen angst.  Let's just skip to the beefcake.

1. Daniel Diemar as the dumb jock Paul. A Victoria native, he played Cole in the tv series Sacred Lies.

2. Dean Tierney, a  New York stage actor, as Paul's Dad or brother or something.  His only other screen credit is A Sip With Vodka: A Russian Guide To Becoming A Real Housewife And Making It In America  (clever if there's not a lot of acting roles on your resume, make sure that every title is extra-long to take up space).

3. Cronin Cullen as another of Paul's relatives.  Dumb Jock has a really hunky family.

4. Billy Thomas Myott as...you guessed it.  Yet another of the Hunk Family.  Top photo: his appearance in Damn Yankees  (the one wearing a shirt).

5. Wolfgang Novogratz as Trig, the entitled snob  who the Girl is dating (does he have siblings named Geometry and Algebra?).   He's the son of Robert and Courtney Novogratz, the design team who host By Design and Home By Novogratz.

6. Actor/martial artist Collin Chou as shy,lonely outsider Ellie's cash-strapped father, who starts a sausage-making business with Dumb Jock.  He's been in some Matrix movies, Marco Polo, and a lot of movies where young martial arts students overcome tremendous obstacles.

7. Enrique Murciano as The Girl's Dad.  He was named #7 in People magazine's annual Sexiest Man Alive list in 2006.

8. Spencer Wawak, the co-founder of the stArt Theater project, as Hangout Dude.  It's not Ibsen, but it plays the bills.

9. Logan Riley Bruner  plays One Person.  He has a very impressive website, with dozens of pictures and video clips, but this is the only shirtless shot, from A Friend of the People (2015).

That's it for the beefcake, except for a few more Hunk Family relatives and some miscellaneous "Student in Hallway" types.  I guarantee that this was more fun than slogging through the shy outsider loner gay teen angst.