Nov 23, 2020

""Gym Shorts": What It's Like to be Hit On by a Gay Guy

 


Gym Shorts is a 2019-2020 web/Amazon Prime series (three episodes to date) about a gym "full of unique characters."  One was written as gay, but changed to straight at the audition, so no gay representation.  But there are bound to be some hunks, and it might bring back some nostalgic memories of the days when you could spend more than 45 minutes at the gym and get within 6 feet of the other patrons.  So I watched the first episode.

Prologue: Middle-aged Kevin listens to depressing music and throws away his wedding ring.

Scene 1:  U-Ran-Us Fitness.  Is this a reflection of Uranians, a 19th-century word for gay men?  I doubt the writers are that well versed in gay history.  Probably just a fifth-grade joke on "your anus."

Personal trainer Chad is advising Nico to not spend so much time on one muscle group: it's way overdeveloped.  Guess which?  The glutes (i.e., your anus).

But Nico is well built, while Chad is rather too skinny to be a personal trainer.  How about hiring actors that look like what they're playing?

Scene 2:  Kevin appears. Chad hard-sells him into a membership, but he insists on a tour first.  Close up of Sam, who is staffing the front desk, sucking on a lollipop.  I don't understand the significance.

It's a very basic gym, two narrow rooms, with some treadmills and free weights.  Some guys playing ball by the weight machine. The "juice bar" is a table with a blender on it.  Juice Bar Guy is sucking on a lollipop.  What's with all the sucking?  Oral sex?  Indicating that these guys are gay?

Cheryl, who wears a skimpy outfit that leaves her belly bare, gets up from the quad machine to flirt with Chad, but he blows her off.  She follows them to the locker rooms, then bursts away in anger.  


Scene 3
: There's a Naked Old Man reading a newspaper in the locker room (no skin).  He checks out Kevin's butt.

Back in the weight room, Nico is working on his glutes.  Chad reprimands him, so he starts on a boxing bag.  With his butt.

Gina is sitting on a butterfly press machine, doing her makeup and complaining about the lighting.  She's wearing high heel shoes.  

Scene 4: Cheryl is secretly watching Chad give the tour.  

We see but do not meet three black guys.  For diversity?  All of the named cast has been white so far.

Aha!  Wesley the officious stick-in-the-mud manager is black. 

Kevin is about ready to bolt, but Wesley invites him into his office to talk it over.

Scene 4:  Wesley has a picture of his wife prominently placed to indicate that he is heterosexual.  Kevin notes that his wife just divorced him and he'll be dating soon, so he needs to look hotter. Plus core strength and cardiovascular fitness?

Apparently this is the only gym in town, so he has no choice.  He signs the contract.


Scene 5: 
Kevin arrives for his first workout.  Sam, working reception, checks out his butt.  

Chad: Just watch me, do what I say, and guys will be hitting on you in no time.

Kevin: But I'm not g___.

Chad: Don't argue with me, dude.

Their first exercise is an incline bench press, which seems rather advanced.  Chad is spotting him, but gets distracted: "Wow, that guy's sexy.  Who is that? He's doing squats, the international sign of a voracious bottom!"

He leaves Kevin choking under a barbell to get the guy's number.  Then he says "One more set, and hit the showers."  After a few reps of one exercise?

"Douchebag!" Kevin mutters.  

I agree.


Beefcake:
Surprisingly little.

Gay characters:  Chad.  I'm guessing Sam with his lollipop, too, and everybody else who sucks on a lollipop or checks out Kevin's butt.  I thought the gay character was removed.  

My verdict:  This gym must be right next to Kevin's workplace.  There's no other reason for joining -- the equipment is sub-standard, Chad is completely incompetent, and the incessant sucking on lollipops and checking-out of butts was creepy, like a straight guy's fantasy of what being hit on by gay guys is like.    

Will I Keep Watching: The gyms are closed again.  I have to make do with free weights and a recumbent bicycle in the basement.  Why not? 

4 comments:

  1. Could be a typo for U-Ram-Us too.

    The squat thing makes me think of Final Fantasy 7's very 90s portrayal of gays. Mostly in the Wall Market sequence where you try to disguise yourself as a prostitute and need to get a wig from the gym. Seriously. They make that exact same joke.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I might have to check out all that subtle lollipop sucking

    ReplyDelete
  3. The show is low budget and has a gay vibe- some of the scenes look like set ups for porn action that was cut. Boomer how did you miss the beefcake of Nick Puya? The 6'4' 230 lbs actor played the very gay Logan. Puya who is based in Florida like the rest of the people on the show could do very well if he does gay for pay porn.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I reviewed the first episode. He doesn't appear until the second. By the third, he, Kevin, and Gina are best friends.

      Delete

No offensive, insulting, racist, or homophobic comments are permitted.

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...