The Jewish Inquirer: A Gay Tease, Anti-Semitic Graffiti, and a Race Car Game

Paul (Tim Downie), hapless reporter for the 4th largest Jewish newspaper in Britain, is doing a story on firefighters.  He talks Gordon the Fireman (David Seymour) into letting him ride the fire truck, turn on the siren, run a redlight.  They are blatantly flirting; the sexual chemistry is melting the camera.   It was so hot that I forgot to mention the scene number or the title of the show:

The Jewish Inquirrer.

Scene 2: Paul is in the supermarket with his friend Simon (Josh Howie), who demonstrates how to pick up women (ineptly).

Paul notes that his interviewee was gay.  They discuss which gay celebrity they would like rescuing them from a fire.  Their choice: Gareth Thomas, rugby player (top photo). "God, I'd love to be held in his arms."

No accounting for tastes.

Paul sees Ruth and wants to ask her out, but Simon advises against approaching: she's Naomi's friend (I don't know who that is).  They both approach her anyway.  Simon gets the number.

Well, it was fun while it lasted.

Interesting fact: In Britain you have to pay for shopping carts.  In America we have to pay for health care.

Scene 3:  Britcoms aren't good at identifying characters, but after going through it twice, I think I've got it: Paul picks up his Dad to go to the birthday party of his young son Joshie.  Dad wants to give Joshie Paul's old race car game ("bags on the blue car!"), but Paul resists, as he still plays with it.

Paul is also giving Joshie a balloon inscribed with his face.  This will be important later.

Scene 4: The party.  Naomi (the ex-wife) yells at him for chatting up her friend Ruth, who is sitting right there.  Then she changes her tune and suggests that he could impress Ruth by playing with her son-from-hell.  She can hear everything you say!

Scene 5:  There are about 100 kids in the back yard, but Paul manages to find Ruth's kid and kiss up t to him.

Suddenly the fire truck arrives.  Apparently Paul arranged for Gordon the Fireman to come to his kid's party.  But Gordon drives right past the house!  Paul calls Emergency Services (he didn't get Gordon's private number?).

Scene 6:  The party is finishing up. Ruth has to go off to her date with Simon from Scene 2.

Paul plays some sort of game with the kids involving throwing cake.

Scene 7:  Naomi and Dad are furious.  The balloon Paul bought for the party, that he never looked at before,  has a picture of a wall defaced with anti-Semitic graffiti.  Apparently Paul sent the wrong photo to the balloon company.

Would you really not keep your work photos and personal photos in separate files?  Would a balloon company really print hate speech?   Wouldn't you check to make sure the balloon was ok before giving it to a kid?   I'm not sure I like this new mishap.

Scene 8: Just as Paul is leaving, Gordon the Fireman arrives, "better late than never."  He is disgusted by the sight of the anti-Semitic balloon, and upset when Paul criticizes him for putting out a fire instead of coming to the party on time (um...saving lives?  Paul is rather a wanker, isn't he?).

Way to lose a prospective boyfriend!

By the way, I was mistaken: Naomi is Paul's sister and Joshi his nephew.

Scene 9:  Simon getting ready for his date with Ruth.  Paul arrives to give him his race car toy set -- Joshie didn't want it, apparently.  They discuss how the vagina changes when a woman has had a baby.

Come on, Paul, are you gay, straight, bi, what?  I'm getting tired of you altogether.  What's with Britcoms and their disagreeable protagonists?

Scene 10:  Paul is at home, working.   Dad drops by., eager to play the race car game, but Paul gave it away.  Dad is desperate to get it back.  Suddenly this is extremely important, so they try to find the fish-and-chips place where Simon is on his date with Ruth.   (it couldn't wait until later?  It's not like he brought the game on the date)

It takes several hours to go through them all.  I've been to Britain three times, and I never saw a Brit eating fish and chips, just tourists.  I thought they were into curries and pompadums.  

Finally Paul finds the right restaurant, where apparently Simon and Ruth have been eating fish and chips for six hours.  He asks for his game back, but Simon has already given it to Ruth's kid.

Suddenly Ruth gets a phone call, and they have to leave right away.  An emergency at home!

I hope it's a fire, and Gordon the Fireman is there to make up with Paul.

Scene 11:  Yep: the race car game overheated, and caused a fire.  Paul apologizes to Gordon the Fireman for being a jerk before, but they don't continue their relationship.  Instead, Paul hugs Ruth.  Say what?

Scene 12:  Paul is reading the latest issue of his newspaper online.  The article about the anti-Semitic graffiti is illustrated by...a picture of Joshie!

 I have to admit, that was funny.  The first laugh I've had in this crazy show.

I went through the other five episodes on fast-forward, and it looks like each one has Paul botching up a relationship with a potential boyfriend.

Or is it all a series of gay teases?.

And the guys aren't even attractive.

Well, Gordon the Fireman isn't bad.

My grade: D