Mar 8, 2025

Mason Cook: The "Speechless" kid grows up, turns bohemian-hipster, builds biceps, and bares it all

  

Link to the n ude photos


You're probably most familiar with Mason Cook as Ray DiMeo, sarcastic younger brother of focus character JJ (Micah Fowler) on Speechless (2015-18).  JJ has cerebral palsy and is nonverbal, "speechless."

Ray gets a lot of gay subtext plotlines, at least in Season 1.  In Season 2, he becomes annoyingly hetero-horny, and eventually gets a serious girlfriend. 

Ray's sudden movement into hetero-horniness was disturbing not only because the gay teases were overturned, but because of the "discovering girls" rhetoric. Mason is over 18 at the time, but his character is 15.  When I was 15, all I ever heard was "You'll discover girls any moment now, and everything you love will become meaningless. You'll join clubs, take classes, choose your college solely in order to see or meet girls. Your buddies will become mere strategists, helping you find, impress, and win girls. You..."

Sorry for the rant, but I really felt betrayed by Ray DiMeo in the second season.  

So you may wonder why I'm posting a profile on Mason Cook


Not because of his gay or gay-subtext performances.

Born in 2000

Guest star in teencoms like Zeke and Luther

Son of the focus charater in the crime drama Legends

Classmate of the focus character on The Middle

 An "eccentric, devout Christian" who has sex with the focus girl, sending her rushing for a "morning after pill," in Plan B.  This was nominated for a GLAAD award because a major character is trans, but Mason is straight.


Not because of his physique.  

The few shirtless photos on Mason's social media suggest that he doesn't spend a lot of time at the gym.









Although he has developed some biceps recently.










More after the break

Deli Boys: Pakistani-American brothers learn a secret about their Dad. With lots of gay characters and some bonus Pakistani d *cks

 


Link to the bonus Pakistani d *cks

Deli Boys (2025), a new comedy on Hulu, features two Pakistani-American brothers, studious, hardworking Mir (Asif Ali, left) and irresponsible cokehead Raj (Saagar Shaikh), who find out a secret about their father's business activities after his death.  

I doubt that a tv series written by and starring Pakistani-American guys will have any gay characters, but there's bound to be some beefcake.








Scene 1
: I was right.  The brothers chase a guy in his underwear, with a bag over his head, and a bulge in his shorts, out of the deli.

Three days earlier: Baba Dar records a commercial for his investors.  He came to American in 1979 with three dollars in his pocket; he worked at a deli, and lived above the store with nine other guys, with six shirts between us  (we see a photo; four of the guys are indeed shirtless).  Today DarCo owns 40 delis around the Philadelphia area, plus Caca brand Achar (a Pakistani relish).  Next he wants to buy some golf courses.

Scene 2: Cokehead Raj in bed with the Shaman Prairie (yes, that's her name) and a clump of around ten people, mostly women but two other guys.   I'm going to guess that he is straight but curved around the edges. 

 They get up and smoke hashish, and then she applies leaches to his back, a sort of New Age thing.

Meanwhile, Drexel Grad Mir tells his father that he learned a lot about business from him, even more than at Drexel University (which he is very proud of), so he's ready for the top spot in the organization. The Girlfriend comes in and tells him that he's ready to give the speech to his father.  


Next he works out, straining with a triceps pushdown.  

Trainer: "I haven't even put the pin in yet."  Dude is weak, har har. 

The Trainer is played by Calvin Thomas (not the queer theorist, the model).

Scene 3: The guys head to the golf course.  They are arguing over who deserves to become president of DarCo when Dad Baba retires.  He shows up to play golf. 

He is upbraiding them for being immature when a golf ball hits him in the head!  He drops dead.  His Caddy, Matthew, screams

Scene 4: As the brothers put a sheet over their dead Dad, Lucky Auntie bursts in.  She was Dad's business partner for thirty years. 

They ask, "Are you going to take care of us now?"  An odd question for grown men in their 30s, but she agrees.

On to the funeral.  The brothers can't do the Muslim prayers right, embarrassing everyone.  

The Caddy ends with "Amen!", har har, and bursts into tears.  Was he, like, Dad's boyfriend?


At the reception afterwards, Ahmad Uncle (Brian George) and Lucky Auntie spar with each other.  Each thinks that the other is out to undermine them and seize control of the company.

I recall Brian George as Babu on Seinfeld, the one with the gigantic waggling finger, but he has 325 acting credits listed on the IMDB. 

Scene 5: While each brother is petitioning to the DarCo board about why each should be named CEO, the feds raid and start making arrests.  They were investigating Dad for fraud, inside trading, tax evasion, and so on, but he had powerful friends.  Now that he is dead, they are able to act.  Lucky Auntie is led off in handcuffs.

More after the break

Mar 7, 2025

"Chicago Party Aunt," Episode 1.5: Free-spirit Diane tries to help repressed Daniel get his first kiss. Will it be with his dentist?

 



Free spirit paired with stick-in-the mud, "life is a banquet" paired with "that's not a good idea", "it's only 2:00 am" paired with "I have a big test tomorrow," has been traditional comedy since the days of Laverne and Shirley and The Odd Couple, In this case, it's Chicago Party Aunt on Netflix, pairing the free-spirit middle-aged Diane with her stick-in-the-mud 18-year old nephew, Daniel (Rory O'Malley, left). 

 I watched Episode 1.5, "Halloween Circle": Daniel tries to get his first kiss at a Halloween party.   No hope that either of the two regulars will be gay, but there might be some gay friends at the party.


Scene 1: Diane takes Daniel to get his first fake id: you have to order "two Chicago hot dogs" at a restaurant, then go through a secret door through the kitchen, a meat locker, another secret door, and into the basement, where a gangster-type offers the id for "his usual fee": a kidney.  Just kidding: $200.

Scene 2: Breakfast in their apartment. Oatmeal for Daniel,  Kahlua for Diane.  They discuss the upcoming Halloween party at Roscoe's, the best gay bar in Chicago.  Daniel is excited about his "first queer Halloween."  Daniel is gay!  I'm speechless!


Turns out that Rory O'Malley  is gay in real life.  I could have gotten that from the IMDB, which notes that he married Gerold Schroeder in 2014.

Daniel wants to get his first kiss from a random hot guy at the party: "I'll go up to him and say 'Would you like to kiss?."  That won't work, dude.  

Diane gives him some cruising tips: open with a joke, then a compliment, then a smouldering look, then the kiss. 

"I can't stay out late because I have a dentist appointment tomorrow.  Ugh!  I hate it when Dr. Gluck make jokes with his hand in my mouth."

"Cancel it!  Tonight you're going to get more than a hand in your mouth!"   


Scene 3:
The hair salon where Diane works. Everyone wearing Halloween costumes. Diane bursts in and asks if they are going to the party tonight.  No, they have other plans.  

So who will Diane party with while Daniel is cruising hot guys?  "Why not ask Gideon?"

"Gideon??? That boring wet blanket?  No way!"  

Gideon, the salon manager (RuPaul), happens to be standing behind her, and criticizes her for her substance abuse and reckless behavior.  Hey, he sounds like Daniel's type.  Hint, hint.

Scene 4:  Daniel working at a coffee shop that sells beet juice and green algae.  I thought he was a teenager?  He tries cruising a hot guy, and fails miserably.   

Meanwhile, Salon Manager Gideon is on a lunch date with a guy he met on a dating app, who is discussing his bizarre diet, then: "So, any fun plans for Halloween?"  

"Face Time with my Mom back in Georgia," Gideon says.  His date is not impressed.

Back at the coffee shop, the manager asks about Daniel's lame cruising attempts.  He says that he's hoping to kiss someone tonight.  Manager advises against taking cruising advice from raunchy Aunt Diane: "She calls me Vanilla Lice, and I'm pretty sure she crop dusted the nut cheese aisle."  I don't know what that is.

More after the break

Reacher, Episode 2.6: Is Reacher homophobic? With a RItchson pixilated p enis, a Berchthold backside, and my new favorite catchphrase


Link to the n*de dudes

In Season 3 of Reacher, the iterant do-gooder (Alan Ritchson, below) mentors shy, troubled college student Richard Beck (Johnny Berchtold).  Richard has a lot of queer codes, such as lack of expressed heterosexual interest and a preference for lavender.  When he stands in Reacher's bedroom doorway after a crisis and asks "Are you ok?", I expected them to hug..or maybe kiss.

I wanted to know if he is canonically gay, so I did a Google search.

Nothing came up about Richard, but some Reddit discussion board posts complained that Reacher was homophobic because he roughed up a gay guy during Season 2.  

Reacher often expresses a disdain for actions, interests, and behaviors that fail to meet alpha-male hegemonic masculinity ("Help you with your flower arrangement?  Nope, nope, I'm teaching you to box"), so I could see him being homophobic.  Let's check out the scene.


It's Episode 2.6, "New York's Finest."

The Story So Far:  A member of Reacher's former military investigation team is murdered, and the whole team may be in danger, so the Man-Mountain and his buddies investigate, from Atlantic City to New York to Denver and back, as the players become more and more powerful.  There are corrupt politicians, corrupt cops, enemies that turn out to be friends, and friends who turn out to be enemies. 





When two hitmen target Reacher and his buds, they kill one and interrogate the other.  He was hired by Swan (Shannon Kook, left), assistant head of security at the defense company New Age (dumb name, innit?).  

They go to the New Age company to ask about Swan.  Director of Operations Marlo arranges a meeting at a warehouse, but when they arrive, it explodes!  She set them up! 












I don't know who plays the hitman, but it could be Kyle Mac, who played a gay character on  Hemlock Grove (2013)

In Episode 2.6, the team will look for Marlo, who has gone into hiding.

Opening Ad: Why you should join the army, har har.

Scene 1:  Reacher's team consists ofL

1. Francis Neaghley, his former partner (a woman)

2. The Hacker, a young woman.

3. David O'Donnell (Sean Sipos, below), below, a lawyer and heterosexual "family man."

They find Marlo and her teenage daughter on the security cam of a convenience store run by a sleazy, clerk.  Noting that the daughter is a gamer, the Hacker suggests tracking her down through her gamer tag.  First they have to wait until she begins playing. 

Scene 2: While they are waiting, Reacher sleeps with team member Francis.

More after the break.

"Big Boys": A gay university freshman tries to make friends, get a boyfriend, find his tribe. With lots of Dylan d *cks

   


Link to the Dylan d *cks

Should I try out Big Boys, a Britcom on Hulu?

Search for n *de photos first.

Whoa, they are definitely big.  Especially Dylan Llewellan.


Narrated by creator/writer Jack Rooke, Big Boys revisits his 19-year old self, attempting to move out of the house to attend uni in the fall of 2013, looking for friends, boyfriends, and his place in the world.

He shouldn't have a problem finding boyfriends. Like I said, the guy is big.  See the photo on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends

I'm reviewing Episode 1.2, "I Wanna Take You to a Gay Bar"

Prelude: 2011: Jack (Dyllan Llewellan) and his Mum  are watching tv when they get the news of Dad's passing.  Shots of the two  crying, cuddling, pushing their feet together, heads on shoulders, legs on laps.  Cringe intimacy you two have.  Americans will perceive an incest subtext, but it's probably not intentional. Brits just like to treat their Mums as their lovers.

Scene 1: 2013:  Jack's first year at Uni.  He can't get into the dorms, so the university moved him and "mature" 25-year old Danny  into an off-campus shed.  Mom is helping them decorate.  

She gives Jack some Tupperware for his marijuana, although he doesn't use, and a  live-laugh-love mobile so he can "live," "have some laughs with a girl," and "fall in love." So Mum is fine with marijuana, but you're not out?  Surely she already knows.


When she leaves, Danny (Jon Pointing) gives Jack a bottle of lubricant -- they were two for one  at Boots -- but he's not sure if backsides take a different kind.  Jack isn't sure either, since he's never been with a guy before.  

"Don't worry, I'll do some research."   

Scene 2: The Student Union Officer announces the "ca-razy" Brent Uni freshers fair, where the first-years try to find their fams. Older Jack, narrating: "Mostly it was second-year drug dealers trying to recruit new clients." 

She tries to sell Jack on the Christian Union, which does a free roast on Sunday nights. Maybe not.

Roommate Danny points out the LGBTQAIA  Student Union.  Jack is afraid to approach, but Danny insists: "You can't be a little saddo all your life."  Why did he make Jack his project?

"But what does the QAIA mean?"

"Queer, Asexual, Intersexed, Allies."  Blimey, when a straight guy knows more than you do....

Uh-oh, Jack sees Yemi (Odisa Odele), the guy he was trying to make out with at the Fresher Mixer last episode. While they were kissing, his hair got caught in the guy's nose ring.  They had to get the Faculty Advisor to cut them loose.  Yemi tries to ignore him, but reconsiders (you think he's hot, or feel sorry for him?). He talks about about the various gay tribes: twink, bear, daddy, pos, otter, trans, and geek.  Jack is obviously a geek.

 They're all going clubbing in London tonight. Wanna come?


Meanwhile, Danny tries to pick up a woman at the Feminist Society table by pushing the free tampons and claiming to be interested in women writers.  Name two. Corinne, a lesbian, interrupts to point out the inconsistencies in his story, but it works: the woman he was cruising invites him to a pre-lash tonight (a private drinking party before you head to the clubs).

Scene 3: Roommate Danny wants Jack to skip the gay clubbing and go to the pre-lash with him, so they can meet some of their fellow students.  They need mates on campus.  Danny is setting himself up as a mentor, but he needs a friend as much as Jack does.  He must have some tragedies and pain in his background, to be revealed later.

Montage of the two getting ready, Danny by working out so he's nicely swole, Jack by reading so he can have an intelligent conversation.

Uh-oh, the Security Guard, whose name is Ru Pal, stops them. Only dormitory residents and signed-in guests, no townies. 

Ok, Danny insists that Jack go to the gay club after all, and he'll stay home, "cooped up like Anne Frank."  Not quite the same thing, buddy.

Scene 4:  Danny is sitting on a bench on campus, trying ineptly to start conversations with passersby, when Corinne, the lesbian from earlier, runs into him.  They argue about feminism.  Her back story: she was the only one in her friend group to get rejected by Oxford and Cambridge.  This is her dull, mundane, state-university-type safety school, full of jocks and eejits.  Wait -- they're doing "You're arrogant!" flirtation arguing.  Is she actually a lesbian, or did I just assume because of her outfit and hair style?

Jack passes by on his way to the pick-up for the gay club, and invites them along.

Scene 5: "No way!  They cannot come!" Yemi, Jack's mentor, yells. "Gays only!"  But their driver says it's fine.

Older Jack, narrating: "It's scary going to your first gay club, 'cause the vast majority are called things like Savage, or Envy, or Revenge."  What about Heaven?

At the club, Gordy's, the drag queen bouncer sizes up Danny: "Straight allies are welcome, but any funny business, f*cking around, laddy banter, any pretending to be Louis Spencer, and you're out!" Louis Spencer is King Charles' nephew, a 30-year old theatrical actor.  I don't know what the drag queen is talking about.

Scene 6: Clubbers dancing, drinking, hugging,  and whooping.  Older Jack narrating: "In spite of being individual misfits, we spent the whole night together."  So this series will be about the various problems of the friendship group.



Danny gets cruised by an obnoxious guy, but gets rid of him by claiming that he comes to London to visit his cousin in Wormwood Scrubs -- a prison.  

I thought Obnoxious Guy was played by Gordon 'Gordy' Maxwell, to whom the episode is dedicated.  There's a memorial article on the Minka Guides website, which describes him as a tv producer and a regular at the Sink the Pink Nightclub.  Except he was over 40, and the episode aired in May 2022, several years after his death in December 2018.  Wait -- the club is named "Gordy's."  That's the homage.

More after the break. 

Mar 6, 2025

David Faustino: Bud from "Married..with Children" is star-ving, humiliated, nekkid, and a gay ally

  



Everybody in West Hollywood watched Married..with Children (1987-1997) for its savage skewering of the heterosexist trajectory of job, house, wife, kids.  Al Bundy (Ed O'Neill, later patriarch Jay of Modern Family) is working at a soul-destroying minimum-wage job and, although he likes women in general, hates having s*x with Peg (Katie Sagal, later Leela on Futurama), a housewife who never cooks or cleans (although the house is always spotless).  His daughter Kelly (Christina Applegate) is constantly lambasted for being a "slut," and his son Bud (David Faustino), for being a "virgin."

Gay people only appeared in one or two episodes, always with a "har-har, they're gay!  Isn't that ridiculous!" comedic edge.  

But at least they weren't sleazoid serial killers.

When David began to bulk up, the writers obliged by making him extremely attractive, but still unable to acquire girls due to his abrasive personality.


After Married, David played a gay character in Get Your Stuff (2000), about a gay couple wanting to adopt a baby as a fashion accessory, and instead getting preteen brothers.  According to the trailer, there are a lot of jokes about the dads accidentally getting n*ked and the boys trying to get with a hot older woman.

In Killer Bud (2001): two down-and-out buds (David, Corin Nemec) try to burglarize a convenience store.  My first Faustino profile said that he played a gay character, but I can't see it in the synopsis.

Inn Ten Attitudes (2001), he played "himself," not gay but on the gay dating circuit (for a sleazy reason).

In 2008 he was cast as the lead in The Gay Robot, a pilot for a tv series about...um, a gay robot.  The project was never filmed, but the script might have been tweaked into the movie Robodoc (2009)

David hasn't played any specifically-identified gay characters since, but he often introduces gay subtexts deliberately into his work.


A lot of his movies feature stoner buddies, often David and Corin Nemec: Pucked, High Hopes, Puff Puff Pass, The Hustle, Not another B Movie.


In his web series Star-Ving (2009), he plays"himself" as a has-been, starving actor whose only source of income is a sleazy video shop.  There are cameos from various actors with a sleazy reputation, including Seth Green, Coolio, Ron Jeremy, and Kato Kaelin. 

There is a again a deliberate gay subtext in his relationship with Nemec, and a lot of backside shots, mostly an attempt to humiliate David or demonstrate how "ugly" he is. 




Here he wakes up after a night of debauchery with Ron Jeremy and some ladies.








More after the break

Panchayat: Gay Subtext Series (With a Little Tweeking) from India


Indian mass media has a rather poor record on gay representation, but that doesn't mean you can't queer the text.  I'm going to go into the Indian tv series Panchayat cold, without any research, because the star Jitendra Kumar is cute.  And I'm going to assume throughout that, no matter what, that the protagonist is gay.

(After watching the episode, I discovered that Kumar plays a gay guy who marries his boyfriend in the 2020 comedy Shubh Mangal Zyada Saavdhan).



Scene 1:
A bus through  the desolate Indian countryside of Uttar Pradesh (Americans: think Kansas).  Abishek cuddles against his boyfriend, who wears a fluffy white sweater tied around his neck.  They both ask the conductor when they will reach Phulera.  

Cut to Abishek at the mall, now in a blue sweater with a feminine silver bracelet, explaining to his chubby friend Prateet why he took a job as Secretary to the Village Pachayat (Office of Rural Development).  In a small town 100 miles from the nearest gay bar!  "What choice did I have? I should have gone to a better college."  

Prateet looks on the bright side: "It's not teaching Gay Studies in Paris, but you'll be digging sewers, building roads. Imagine the hunks in your crew, girlfriend!  You'll be getting more action than any of the big city queens.  Come on, I'll buy you a striped shirt.  They're slimming!"

Back to the bus.  Cuddle Bear was just a trick -- Abishek is alone when they finally reach Phulera -- or rather, the dry desolate outskirts. 


Scene 2:
  Chubby Prahlad and svelte, stylish Vikas are sitting on a bench outside a run-down government building, waiting for Abishek's arrival:  Prahlad says: "I hope he's a top -- and hung!" Vikas scoffs: "And into you?  Please!"  

Abishek drives up on his motorcycle.  They check out his bulge while Vikas introduces himself as his new assistant.  "And Prahlad is the Deputy Pradhan (deputy mayor, I think). I sent you his profile on Grindr, remember?"

"Sure," Abishek says.  "I'm into chubbies.  We'll talk later."

They are moving Abishek into a spare room in the building.  It's all furnished, but the bed might be too big  -- they didn't know how...um...big Abishek was.

Scene 3: Town rich guy Brij Bushan, husband of the Pradham (mayor?), arrives.  First he makes Vikas wash his hands for him, and then search in his pockets for the key to the building.  Obviously he expects Vikas to grope him.  Abishek is shocked -- what a closet case!  This is the 21st century.  Just come out!

Scene 4: Brij lost his key, so they head to the fields to look for it.  Abishek gets squirted by a water jet and steps in ox poop, and there aren't any hunks around!  He thinks: I wish I was back in Delhi, cruising the waiters at the Cafe D'Etoile!

They can't find the key, so Vikas drives into town to fetch a locksmith.

While they are waiting, Brij invites Prahlad home for "um...a cup of tea."  He refuses.  Not into Daddies!

Scene 5:  Brij's house.  He tells his battleaxe wife: "I'm thinking of inviting the new Secretary over for dinner."  She yells: "Sure, invite the Secretary, and those two queens from the office, and all of your Grindr hookups ! Turn this house int a gay bar!  I don't mind!"


Scene 6:
  Abishek is walking through the disheveled, rundown, old-fashioned village, where women still wear saris and carry water jugs on their heads, and the men are all homophobic: "You dress mighty fancy.  Where are you from, San Francisco?"  Or else they try to grift money from him.

Scene 7: Abishek waits at the office.  Finally Vikas returns, with no locksmith and a convoluted story about how he got into a motorcycle accident.  They have to break the lock to get into the building.

Cut to Battleaxe Wife yelling: "You're not breaking my lock, you worm! Let the office stay closed!"

"But the Secretary will have no place to stay -- unless he stays with us."

"What?  You want to move one of your boyfriends into my house?  No way! Just break the lock!"

Scene 8: Night.  Abishek arrives at Brij's house for dinner.   Brij cautions him: "The situation inside is delicate, so be careful.  Stay in the closet, ok?"  

The two eat.  Wife cooks, but is too homophobic to join them.

Scene 9:  Back at the office.  Vikas didn't break the lock -- he broke the whole door down. 

A horrible, dark, dusty room, with papers and furniture scattered everywhere.  An antiquated computer.  Beefcake pictures of Rama and Vishnu on the walls.  

They leave Abishek to his squalid digs.  He calls his friend Prateet in the city. "This is much worse than I expected!  I want out!  I want to come home!"

"But sweetie, the only way you can get another job is to clear CAT (the Common Admission Test for graduate management training)" Prateet tells him. "Besides, this experience will look good on your resume.  You've seen the real India, the down-to-earth Middle America of India!"

"The Middle America of India is full of closet cases and homophobic idiots.  I'm studying for the CAT.  Send me the books, in care of Vikas Khan."

"You have a boyfriend already?  Girl, I told you there'd be wall to wall hunks!"

"Just write down the address."

We zoom out to the utter darkness of the countryside.

The end.

I changed a tiny bit of dialogue, but otherwise this is a major gay subtext series.

See also: Deli Boys: Brothers discover a secret about their Dad.  With lots of gay characters and some random Pakistani d*cks

Never Have I Ever: Indian teenage meets the bulge that can raise the dead



Mar 5, 2025

Gavin MacIntosh: Gay middle schooler, bullying brother, scary sleazoid. With Gavin's goods and Hayden's junk

  


Link to the n*de dudes



I was asked to profile Gavin MacIntosh.   Never heard of him, but he's got some nice lats, so I'm willing to do the research.

















Problem: there six photo collections of Gavin Munn and his friends and relatives, so another Gavin will play havoc in the Actors A-L Index.  

Maybe if I call him Mac.

Instagram first: photos of Mac riding a motorcycle, in Athens and Hong Kong, a lot of muscle selfies.

A lot of photos of bodybuilders on his wall.  Are they there for inspiration or aesthetic enjoyment?




For inspiration, probably.  He has a lot of photos with a girl: dude is straight.
















Is he a little too young for a profile, or does he just have that sort of face?

IMDB next: 

Gavin is an actor and Ford model (so he posed on top of cars?), born in Tucson in 1999.

  His role as Connor on The Fosters (2013-16) brought him "world wide social media attention, both for his acting accolades as well as for his social stance on equality."

So who is Connor to get world wide social media attention?

Fan Wiki next:

Connor appears in 25 episodes, from 2013 to 2016.  He starts off as a middle school student, the only one in the whole school who doesn't bully Jude (Hayden Byerly) for being a foster.  Eventually the two start a relationship, in spite of his homophobic father.

Their kiss got worldwide media attention because they were so young.

Due the difficulties of living with a homophobic father (and to bring the gay storyline to an end), Connor moves to Los Angeles to live with his mother, and the two break up. 


Jude stayed on for two more seasons.


















More after the break

Gemstones Episode 3.2: Kelvin's buddies, gay Percy, two toxic families, and some n*de soldiers

 I have to double up these reviews, or I won't be finished in time for Episode 4.1


Link to the NSFW version

Episode 3.2 introduces Eli's estranged brother-in-law Peter Montgomery, his sons, and a disturbing super-macho mirror of Kelvin's God Squad.

Title: "But Esau Ran to Meet Him," from Genesis 33.4.  Jacob has tricked his father Isaac into giving him the inheritance.  Esau is furious and vows to kill him, so he flees.  When he returns after 20 years, Esau behaves as if he is happy to see him, but....

Stephen's abusive wife:  Stephen, who was fired as Judy's guitarist after her brothers discovered their affair, is trying to tell his wife Kristy that he was "laid off," not fired.  She doesn't buy it.  It's a highly abusive relationship: she calls him "an unemployed, cokehead piece of sh*twho sulks all day."  He screams "Fuck you!", and she hits him with a glass blender.  Shattered glass all over his face and head, in front of the kids!  Whoa, scary.  The Gemstones and their partners argue, but they never use abusive language or physical violence.  Except for the time that Amber shot Jesse in the backside 

Later, Judy meets Stephen at Spanky's Cafe, a real restaurant in North Charleston, and offers him $10,000 to leave her alone: "I don't want to see you no' mo'."  But he still wants her.  Judy points out that he's married, but it doesn't matter: "I'd leave my family in a second if I could have you.  I'd murder them." Say what?  This guy is a psycho. Of course, he should leave his abusive wife, but murder her...and the kids?


Kelvin's Buddies:  
Jesse and Amber's adult son Gideon, who moved to California to become a stuntman, is back, lying on the veranda in a bathrobe, smoking a cigarette, holding a box of Lucky Charms cereal, and sulking.  The background song by Buddy Knox tells us: "I think I'm going to kill myself."  He injured his neck, and may never do stunt work, tumbling, or martial arts again.  At least he's displaying a nice chest.

Background alert: Skyler Gisondo injured his neck in real life in 2022, when his hair stylist gave him a "little neck massage."  They wrote his injury into the script.

In a much, much nicer parallel to the Stephen-Mandy confrontation, Gideon's parents order him to stop feeling sorry for himself, get off his backside, and go to work for the church.  But he doesn't want to preach.  Ok, so he can become Eli's driver. Remember that the long-term driver, Walker, was fired.

We cut to Gideon on his first assignment, driving Eli and the siblings to see if May-May's kids are ok.  They are living with her estranged husband, Peter Montgomery, and his militia, the Brotherhood of Tomorrow's Fires: they expect end of civilization, like Eli's Y2K scare back in 1999.   Eli calles them preppers: "They want to make sure they don't run out of toilet paper."


Usually Evangelicals believe in the Rapture, when Jesus zaps everyone who is saved to Heaven, leaving the unsaved to suffer through seven years of the dystopian Tribulation before being sent to hell.  To this day, I will not let anyone stamp my hand for re-entry into an event, because  the Mark of the Beast was drummed into my head.  But Eli and Peter apparently have a different belief system.

On the way to the compound, at the defunct Boy Scout Camp Wooden Feather, the siblings discuss their cousins, Karl and Chuck.  Kelvin says that he always found them "kind of dumb and strange."  But you haven't seen them since 2000, when you were ten or eleven.  How much do you remember?

Judy: "That's why I'm surprised you weren't b utt buddies with them."  

He gets annoyed, not because she alludes to him being gay but because she implied that he's also "dumb and strange," and therefore perfect for the Montgomerys.

Not the God Squad:  Bizarre signs like "Now we will see" greet the family, along with multiple armed guards.  They pass Jacob (Stephen Louis Grush) cutting up a deer.  Kelvin smiles at him -- think he's hot, buddy?.  Then a military-style obstacle course;  guys practicing martial arts; a guy taking a shower outdoors (no beefcake); and finally the mess hall, where about thirty militia men are having lunch.

Wait -- no women and children?  The actual far-right militia movement has many female participants, but this is a male-only space, like Kelvin's God Squad in Season 2, but with scruffy guys in military fatigues instead of flexing musclemen.  It is dedicated to phileo instead of eros, buddy-bonding instead of homoerotic desire. An article on Doomsday Preppers notes that these male-only groups "cultivate a dangerous vision of apocalyptic manhood that consummates a fantasy of national virility in the demise of feminine society."  Women are weak and fragile, their civilization doomed. Only the "manly love of comrades" can survive the Apocalypse. 

May-May's son Chuck ushers Eli and the siblings in. They are greeted by Cousin Karl (Robert Oberst), who is delighted to see them; and Uncle Peter (Steve Zahn, below), who is not.  It's time for church, so get out!  No, the siblings offer to help lead the service: Jesse will preach, Judy will sing, and Kelvin will  perform some "feats of strength" for the kids -- the only time he references his muscles during the season.  No kids around, but maybe the militia guys would like to see some masculine beauty.   


Uncle Peter rejects the siblings' offer.  They are "phony fakers," entertainers, interested in making money rather than saving souls. 






More military guys after the break

Gemstones Episode 3.1, Continued: Kelvin withholds s ex, Judy cheats, and Jesse fights. With some random butts

 


This is the G-rated version of the review. Link to the NSFW version.

Left: Conor MacGregor

The Book Signing: Eli is at a bookstore, signing copies of his "definitive autobiography" -- his third. Did you mention having a gay son?  Suddenly May-May, who attacked his wife Aimee-Leigh back in 2000, hands him one of his earlier books: Y2K: When the World Goes Dark. 

In 1999. many claimsmakers worried that computers were only set up for the 1900s, so on January 1, 2000, they would all reset. Bank accounts would empty; airplanes would fall from the sky; the world would descend into chaos. Some evangelists, like Eli Gemstone, made money by connecting the Y2K bug with end-time prophecies.

Eli is not happy to see his May-May -- he has a restraining order against her.  But she needs his help.  Wait -- you storm in and throw his old book at him to ask for help?  

Later, Eli records the section of his autobiography about Y2K: when the world didn't end, he and Aimee-Leigh had to face anger and ridicule. 


Marital Squabbles
: A commercial: after a montage of heterosexual couples arguing and then being deliriously happy, Amber introduces her System (stupid name): for $500, you get a jar and some beads.  Every time you disagree, you put a bead in the jar.  Or go to Wal-Mart and buy the set-up for $10. She is surrounded by a group of ladies in white who look rather like Mormon sister-wives.

When the filming is over, Amber and Jesse discuss the Simkins, who are milking their parents' tragic death: "I wish I had some traumatic event to make people like me."  Be careful what you wish for, Buddy. I've seen Episode 3.7.

Cut to Judy's husband BJ at the Gemstone Welcome Center, talking to a group of potential church members about how to get their tithes automatically deducted from their bank accounts. Judy, feeling guilty about withholding sex, brings him some gifts and tells him what a great husband he is, BJ thinks that things are a little off in their marriage, but Judy gaslights him: "Things are fine. Why are you being weird?"  Check out his hot-pink ruffled outfit, part of the ongoing joke that couple is gender-transgressive, with Judy as the masculine partner, and BJ the feminine.

The Dildo Barbecue:
 Jesse drops by as Keefe is melting down some weird phallic objects on the grill in the back yard. When he asks what they are burning, Kelvin, morosely lying on the diving board of the pool, responds "Devils' objects."

Why is he morose?  The last we saw of him was at Dusty Daniels' racetrack. But this scene is coming after two marital problem scenes, so we have to conclude that we just missed a "Things are fine.  Why are you being so weird?" conversation. 

There is a n ude woman on the urn pedestal next to them.  Apparently Kelvin and Keefe are too closeted for back yard sculptures with nude men.


Keefe is wearing a BDSM  outfit: several chokers, a slave collar with padlock, a vinyl top with built-in pecs and abs, and vinyl pants (I think). This again suggests that something has gone wrong. He wanted "cuddling," but Kelvin refused, ordering him to burn some s ex toys instead -- destroy some penises?   

Notice that while Kelvin and Jesse are discussing their anxiety over leading the church, Keefe grabs a toy from the pile, tries to hide it, and brings it into the house.  

Aha!  Kelvin is specifically refusing to take the passive role.  

We cut to the reason Judy has been withholding s ex with BJ: she is having an affair with her guitarist, Stephen (Stephen Schneider, top photo and left).  

Trigger alert: they engage in a quasi-s exual act to disgusting to describe here.

Since the couples' stories are usually parallel, viewers may conclude that Kelvin, too, is having an affair.  Actually, he is not -- yet.  Then why is he withholding s ex? 

Unless you are asexual and work something out, romantic partners must balance eros and phileo.  Eros, sexual desire, leads to that intimacy, intensity, and passion that keeps the couple focused on each other. Phileo, friendship, keeps the couple focused on the outside world, leading to discussions of art, music, or sports, placing them in a friendship group, a family, and a society.

Last season Kelvin tried to eliminating the phileo, being all about sex. Every word, every image evoked the homoerotic. His physique, butt, and bulge were constantly on display, presenting him as the Messiah of Muscle, leading his followers to a paradise of masculine beauty. Until it didn't work: you can't build a society, or a romantic relationship, on sex alone.


This season he seems to be eliminating the eros, withholding se x, or maybe permitting "fooling around" only -- no sm ut, no lust, no coconuts.  We see no pecs, no backsides, no bulge this season -- not until Episode 3.8, when he realizes that this won't work, either.  The problem is, a romance without physical intimacy looks and feels very much like a platonic friendship, until eventually you wonder if you are really in love at all.

More  after the break

Mar 4, 2025

Sonny with a Chance/So Random

Speaking of Southern Baptist Sissies, Matthew Scott Montgomery has played a nearly-gay character on the Disney Channel.

The teencom Sonny with a Chance (2009-2011) starred Demi Lovato as the Sonny, the "new girl" on the teen sketch comedy show So Random!  











Plotlines interspliced sketches from the show with the back-stage antics of Sonny and her costars, particularly the joined-at-the-hip Nico (Brandon Mychal Smith, right) and Grady (Doug Brochu).  The two were a barely-heterosexualized gay couple, physically intimate (whenever he gets scared, Nico jumps into Grady's arms), exclusive (except when one is asked out by another guy), and passionate.



The main antagonists were the stars of the teen soap MacKenzie Falls, especially dreamboat Chad Dylan Cooper (Sterling Knight, above left, partying at the gay club Tigerheat, and right, bonding with bff Zac Efron in 17).  Chad imagines himself a serious artist, vastly superior to the clowns of So Random!  But eventually he warms up to them, and begins dating Sonny.





When Demi Lovato left the series, it was revamped into a musical variety program, So Random! (2011-2012), with the cast playing "themselves" in comedy sketches and musical numbers.  Several new characters were added, including Shane Topp (left) and Matthew Scott Montgomery, who played the gay-coded Angus.  He has also played gay characters in Warren the Ape, Second Shot, and Feed.

Demi Lovato is a gay ally, but other cast members haven't made any pro- or anti-gay statements.  Sterling Knight, housemate of of Ryan Pinkston, is probably gay or bisexual, or at least gay-positive enough to take off his shirt at gay clubs.

Mar 3, 2025

Knox Gibson: Australian swimmer, model, "Hunger Games" baddie, disability advocate. With some n*de costars and random twinks

 


Link to the n*de dudes


As of this writing Knox Gibson. aka Captain Knoxie,  is 17 years old,  so I won't be searching for n*de photos. But he's not shy about showing off his physique.

And I have some n*de photos of his co-stars and some random Australian twinks (on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends).










Knox grew up in Orange, NSW, a small town about 250 km (150 miles) from Sydney.  His first love is swimming: he was selected for the Australian Age National Championships four times, and placed for the breast stroke  (2021, 2024) and the individual medley (2023). 






























He also swims for his high school, St. Stanislaus College in Bathhurst. In 2024, he represented NSW in the all-Australia School Sport Games, and won the silver medal in the breast stroke.









Knox's second love is modeling, both fashion and runway. 

In  2020, he wore Tommy Hilfinger for New York's Fashion Week.  

In 2023, the Bonds company did a "As Worn By Us" campaign, showing Australians of every age wearing their clothes.  Knox appeared as  "Age 16."

More after the break
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