"Just Friends": Dutch Rom-Com about RIch/Poor Boys and their Overbearing Mothers

 Just Friends, on Amazon Prime, a tv-movie from 2018: "Something beyond the pleasures of a young gay love story, and the conflicts with their families have nothing to do with their sexuality."  

It might be a change of pace from the endless autobiographical "coming out in a world where no gay institutions exist."  

Plus it's from the Netherlands. I'll check it out.

Scene 1:  The motorcycling Joris (Josha Stradowski) leaves Amsterdam, stops to play with his drone, and calls his mother.  At a shopping mall, the heavily-shopping, smoking socialite, who looks the same age as Joris, upbraids him for forgetting Mother's Day. Suddenly her heel catches on the escalator, and she falls on her face. Har-har.  Serves her right for being an entitled richster.    

Joris continues on the motorcycle, and finally meets Mom and snippy, entitled teenage Sister.  They criticize him for not visiting his father while he was sick, although they didn't visit, either.  

They've come to the cemetery to pick up Dad's ashes.  No one wants them, so Joris gets them by default.  

Scene 2: Feet getting off a train. No doubt Yad (Majd Mardo), Syrian refugee, waiting at the train station.  He remembers working as a stripper (in a gay club, I assume) and overdosing on GHB and vodka.  A nice, non-critical middle-class Mom picks him up -- she even brings pastry!  She tells him not to use the name of Jesus in vain (fundamentalist -- is she going to be homophobic?  And not Muslim.  I guess there are Christians in Syria). 

At home, Dad is busily working on his book.  Yad hugs him and his baby sister.  Mom says that since he's moved back home, he'll pay rent and do his own laundry.  I get it -- rich is entitled and bitchy, poor (or middle class) is kind and virtuous.

Scene 3:  Yad goes to the beach and asks for his old job as a surfing instructor back.  Nope, full up.   A girl hugs him and welcomes him home -- he was in a downward spiral in Amsterdam.  They go surfing (surfboards with little sails attached). 

Meanwhile, Joris is at the same beach, playing with his drone.  He sees Yad, and sends his drone out to investigate. "Yum...what a hunk!"

Scene 4: Back home, Joris mixes up some muscle-building powder.  He passes Mom -- super-strung out on drugs -- and goes to the gym, where the personal trainer criticizes his technique (poor guy gets criticized by everybody).  He stops to gaze at the bulge of the guy doing bench presses (um...we already knew that he was gay before we started the movie.  He calls his grandmother, and promises to pick up milk.

Meanwhile Yad is filling out a job application. "It's just cleaning, no nursing or groceries, and it's just 14.5 per hour" ($16.45 U.S., which is double minimum wage.  What's the problem).  She gives him the job -- and her phone number.  Hey, that's sexual harassment!

Scene 5: Cut to Yad making an old lady's bed, while she bemoans world events, mentions that she lost her best friend Sophie to the Holocaust,  and asks where he's from.  He won't say.  Suddenly her grandson arrives with the milk.  Time for a meet-cute.

But first Grandma sits Grandson Joris down with chocolate milk to discuss family squabbles.  Yad comes in; Joris turns in slow motion.  His jaw drops to the floor.  The most beautiful man he's ever seen!  Geez, they do that old cliche even in gay romances. 

They shake hands.  Yad finds some reason to bend over to display his butt (I knew you were a bottom three scenes ago).   Unfortunately, Joris is too overcome by horniness to say anything.  

Joris goes out to trim Grandma's hedge, and takes off his shirt, but Yad is not impressed: he complains to Grandma about her grandson's use of  "ridiculous muscle-building machines."  It's called a gym, dude. You have to join one, or they take away your gay card.

Scene 6:  Upset over his inability to attract the hunk, Joris goes home and collapses onto the bed.  Meanwhile, Yad tells his Mom about his new job.  She disapproves; "You went to medical school!"  "I dropped out."  "Cleaning old ladies' rooms is beneath you!"  "I like it"

Scene 7:   Joris at a barbecue at his Sister's elegant house, chatting while her husband tries to grill while holding a baby. Give him a hand instead of ruminating over your problems!  He decides to take surfing lessons to impress the hunk, and doesn't stick around for dinner. 

Scene 8:  Joris paying for his surfing lessons.  The sign says "No Credit Cards" in English.  That's the problem with the Netherlands -- you rarely hear Dutch in public.  Whoops, he's assigned a girl teacher.  Nope, changed my mind!  

Next stop: Grandma's house, where apparently Yad has a full-time job cleaning and being hunky.  Yad asks: "What music are you listenng to?"  A conversation opener! Go for it!  But Joris is too overwhelmed by horniness to answer properly, so Yad takes the lead, going through his playlist and commenting.  

Overcome by horniness, Joris rushes off.  This guy is a basket case!  Is he not, like, aware that he is gay?  Yad yells "Hey, can I get your number?"  Grandma gives it to him.

Scene 9:  Joris on the exercise bike at the gym.  Yad sends him some sexy pics.  He texts a date request.  But Yad never responds! 

Scene 10: Mom is at Grandma's house to discuss her birthday.  Yad introduces himself.  Mom is prejudiced against refugees or Syrians: "he'll steal all your valuables."  But Grandma insists on giving him his own key. to the house.  

When she leaves, Grandma apologizes: She used to be a nice girl.  Then she got rich. 

Scene 11:  Back home, Mom rants at Joris about Grandma's new "Muslim type."  Finally the "Muslim type" texts him back; they set up the date.  The overjoyed Joris rushes to shower and change clothes.  Mom is suspicious.

While Joris picks up Yad for their date, Yad's Dad stares from an upstairs window.  Does he, like, not know that his son is gay?

Scene 12:  The date is hanging out at the beach -- where they go every day anyway.  How about something a little more elaborate, like a nice dinner -- in town?  I'm sick of looking at a beach.  They play with the drone, swim, and finally do a weird upside down kiss. 

I'll stop the scene-by-scene recap there. 

Yad and Joris are both out to all their relatives, so that's not a problem.  Everyone approves of the match except the Moms, each of whom thinks that the boyfriend isn't good enough for her son.  Conflict comes with....um...Joris's Dad had an affair before he died?  

Beefcake:  Joris has his shirt off a lot, and displays an underwear bulge.  Yad, not so much.  There are no other significant male characters, just sisters and mothers.

Gay Characters:  Just Joris and Yad.

Locations: Just the beach at Almere, 30 km from Amsterdam.  I wanted to see the Oude Kirke and some canals.

Rich/Poor Divide:  They appear to be trying a rich boy/poor boy conflict, but I can't really tell the difference between the two families.  Both are clearly affluent.

Title:  They're never just friends, that is, not-romantic.  Does "gewoon vrienden" mean something else in Dutch?

My Grade: B.