Link to the n*de photos.
Scene 1: Teagan Tao introduces her parents, Dad David, who owns boutique hotels, and Mom Ella, who is deeply in love with him. During her rowing competition, Dad gets a phone call. "I have to take this." But before he leaves, he and Mom mention how deeply in love they are, and kiss. Do they do this every time they part? "I have to go to the bathroom. I'm deeply in love with you. Back in a minute."
She wins the competition! But Dad isn't there. He texts "I'm sorry." Sorry for missing the competition, or...
Turns out that Dad defrauded his investors out of millions, and scrammed before he could be grabbed by the FBI. Teagan and Mom, newly impoverished, have to leave L.A. to move back to her home town in Massachusetts.
Scene 2: Establishing shot of the small town of Eagles Cove, established 1791. Mom points out the Fudge Store ("nobody actually likes fudge"), the Crab Shack where she got her first job, and finally their new house, which actuallly belonged to Nanny and Grandpa. Her grandmother was named Nanny?
Fortunately, Dad left an education trust, so Teagan can go to the ritzyEaston Prep. "But their team isn't even on a Top Ten list. Coaches from Stanford were scouting me. Who's going to see me out here?" Everywhere in Massachusetts is less than two hours from Boston, New York, and Philadelphia.
While Mom is unpacking, Teagan grabs a bike and heads into town. She's so busy gawking at the rubes that she hits a pickup truck and plunges into the bed. The owner is a cute teen boy, Cam Dillinger (Kyle Clark) I'm guessing that this is a meet-cute with her Love Interest. After a few minutes of yelling and some Boy-of-My-Dreams gawking, he offers to fix her bike.
Scene 3: Off to school. It's a huge Tudor-style castle (actually filmed at Hatley Castle, a 1906 Tudor Revival mansion in Victoria, British Columbia). "Can a school have a British accent?" Teagan asks.
The student body president and dance committee chair introduce themselves. "I'm glad the school isn't all horse girls," Teagan says.
"Um...I'm captain of the equestrian team. What school doesn't have horses?"
A long haired person wearing a tie and sportscoat draws her aside. "I've never seen anyone unalive their social status so quickly." I turn the sound on to determine their gender. It's a girl, her "first day buddy."
Founded in 1798, Easton Prep is the "Harvard of high schools," mostly boarders, but some townies commute by helicopter. "Looks like a Skarsgaard convention," Teagan muses. "Who's the hunk?"
The guy in the blazer is Arrogant Josh (Samuel Braun), sixth generation Easton Prep, Prom King when he was freshman. His buddy is Ryder, who has made out with half the girls in the school. Heterosexual identity established immediately.
"They only started admitting girls two years ago. Great if you're straight, less cheer if you're queer." Sounds like the androgynous girl has come out to her new friend.
Next we meet the equally arrogant Leon. "Stay away from him. He's arrogant!"
"I noticed, sigh." So, will it be Josh, Ryder, Leon, or the guy with the truck?
Scene 4: Mom sees a "help wanted" notice on the door of a store that sells glasses and pillows. The manager, Heather, recognizes her from high school, and from "that photo of you lying by the pool" in New York Magazine. So you thought she was hot?
Now she can't admit that she wants a job, so she pretends that she came in to shop.
Cut to English class, discussion of Byron's "She Walks In Beauty." The blackboard has "rebellious," "charisma," "melancholy," but not that he was bi. Arrogant Josh comes in late and disrespects the teacher, Mr. Wu (not in the imdb or end of episode cast list).
Mr. Wu makes Josh read it aloud, and Teagan falls in love with him.
"What do you think it means?" Mr. Wu asks.
"It means Byron was trying to smash."
Mr. Wu doesn't like this answer -- "Just because you're the famous star of the rowing team" -- but it's completely accurate. Wait -- rowing team?
More after the break
Scene 5: The Headmistress tells Coach Hayden (Thomas Cadrot) that the Haverford Cup is "not far away. Are we ready?"
"Too soon to say."
"Surely you know that rowing is the most popular sport at Easton, and in the world, and we used to have the best team. Parents have contributed a lot of money to make sure our team gets back to top rank. That's why I hired you, so go make us famous (er, more famous)!." But Teagan was talking like this was a hick school with a bottom-ranked rowing team. Surely if she's into the sport she would know about the best team on the planet.
Scene 6: The boathouse. Teagan looks around, sees the many trophies in glass cases, and is shocked. The team -- all boys -- bursts in and starts taking off stuff. Teagan gazes lustfully at Josh's abs. Nothing wrong with that. So am I.
She wants to join the girls' team, but they don't have one. Not enough girls interested -- or any.
"I'm a lightweight sculler."
"Sorry, one isn't enough." Why not? Scullers use two oars to row, one on each side.
"Can I at least train here?"
"No, but there's a rowing club in a town a few towns over."
On RG Beefcake and Boyfriends: Logan/Josh n*de, but I think it's an artist's interpretation. There's a hard-to-see watermark on the guy's abs.
Next, Tegan breaks into the school's boathouse and takes one of the boats out.
Scene 8: Sleazy Leon, or maybe Josh -- I can't tell them apart -- invites her to a party "for girls who are up for a little fun. Are you fun?"
"No, and never with you. You're too arrogant." Besides, he's dating the student body president, or at least making out with her.
It's actually a town party by the waterfront, held every year to say goodbye to the summer.
Uh-oh, "Report to the Headmistress's Office immediately!" Security cams caught her taking the boat out! For punishment, she has to mop.
Cam, the guy from the truck shows up. Teagan is shocked: she thought he was poor. He is, but he got a scholarship. And he's on the rowing team. I'm out of space, but I can see the triangle from here: Poor but nice Cam vs. rich but arrogant Josh. They always go with the poor guy.
Beefcake: Some shirtless shots, no other parts. Here's the whole team and the coach.
Another crew, with more obvious parts, on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends.
Gay characters Baloo (Jude Wilson), who appears in every episode, will have a "forbidden romance" with Logan (Tyler Roberge, stuff on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends) from a rival team. It will play out over four episodes.
My Grade: I'm not really into sports, or romances, and there's not enough beefcake to get through it. Off Campus had the same plot, with n*de athletes. C.
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