Jason Segel: Heterosexual college student, husband, oldster. But at least he showed us his penis

  

Everybody knows who Jason Segel is, but it's hard to name a movie or tv series he's famous for.  He's just been a fixture in the media, hanging out with the Judd Apatow gang.

So here are some highlights from his acting, not his hanging-out:

1. Freaks and Geeks, 1999, a sitcom about high school life in the 80s. He plays the drummer Nick Andopolis.

2.Slackers, 2002, not the cinema-verité about slackers in Austin, Texas.  The usual gang of idiots, including Devon Sawa and Jason Schwartzman, try to help their buddy win the Girl.

3. Undeclared, 2003. The usual gang of idiots, including Jay Baruchel and Seth Rogan, go to college, except Jay's dad tags along.

4. Knocked Up, 2007. The usual gang of idiots, including Jay Baruchel, Paul Rudd, and Seth Rogan, deal with Seth's one-night-stand getting pregnant.  And Jason gets naked, sort of.

5. Forgetting Sarah Marshall, 2008. A starring role: Jason heads to Hawaii so he can forget Sarah Marshall.  Except she tags along.  He gets naked again, sort of.

Just kidding.  He goes Full Monty.

6. I Love You, Man, 2009.  Jason needs a best man for his wedding, but he has no male friends, so he goes on some man-dates to find one.  The description sounds totally homophobic.

7. The Five Year Engagement, 2012.  They take that long because each wedding plan ends in catastrophe.

8. This is the End, 2013.  The usual gang of idiots faces the Apocalypse.

9. Sex Tape, 2014.  It's about what you think.

10. How I Met Your Mother, 2005-14.  Never saw it, but I understand that Jason plays Marshall, one of the gang in the story that Ted tells his kids for nine years.

11. Our Friend, 2019, is about dying people. Sounds awful.

12. The Sky is Everywhere,2022, is about a grieving musician.  

13. Shrinking, 2023, is about a grieving therapist.  Hold on, I'm seeing a pattern here. 

So, college-student hetero-romances, middle-aged hetero-romances, and grief-stricken older people.  The cycle of life.  

No gay characters, not gay in real life, and the guy's not handsome or muscular.  Why does he deserve a profile, again?

Oh, right -- his dick.

See also: This is the End: Celebrities are Left Behind

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