Where have you gone, Joe DiMaggio?
Our nation's turned its lonely eyes to you.
What's that you say, Mrs. Robinson?
Jumpin' Joe has left and gone away.
So who was this Joe DiMaggio whose passing represented the disillusionment of modern life?
For one thing, he hadn't passed, He lived until 1999.
He was a baseball player, a center fielder for the New York Yankees from 1936 to 1951, and a major cultural icon for the next 40 years.
Why was he so popular? And more importantly, did he have a gay connection?
It's impossible to search the internet. The keyword "gay" is overwhelmed by references to an article, "The Silent Season of a Hero" (1966), by a man named Gay Talese.
"There's not a man alive, straight or gay, who wouldn't want to have sex with her!"
"Every man, straight or gay, is looking for a woman like her!"
Back to the gay connection. Maybe it's in Madonna's Vogue (1990), where DiMaggio is included in a list of film greats who were gay or bisexual:
Greta Garbo, and Monroe
Dietrich and DiMaggio
Marlon Brando, Jimmy Dean
On the cover of a magazine
But other people think Joe was hot. On a 1998 episode of Seinfeld, Kramer mentions that he saw Joe DiMaggio at a doughnut shop. The homophobic George, who has spent the episode worrying that he is gay because "it moved" during a massage, nevertheless concedes that DiMaggio is "a handsome man."
"There's not a man alive, straight or gay, who wouldn't want to have sex with him!"
"Every man, straight or gay, is looking for a man like him!"
Oh, and also Joltin' Joe's many close same-sex friendships, and the photos that recently appeared of him frolicking naked in the shower with his teammates.
See also: Not Liking Sports; and The Gay Connection of Willie Mays and Mickey Mantle.