Aaron Collict: "N*ked Attraction" contestant, modelwith a degree in math, Albanian teen, Afghan daddy, caveman with a d*ck.

  

Link to the n*de photos

One of my first beefcake images was in a kids' book about the Stone Age: the Lake Dwellers of neolithic Switzerland, around 3000 BC, n*ked as they hauled in their nets. 

I've read a lot about prehistory since, and visited some Neolithic sites, so I don't have much patience for the portrayal of the wacky caveman Robin in the British Ghosts.  He says he lived around the time of Stonehenge, 3000-2500 BCE, the Neolitic Era, with permanent villages and domesticated plants and animals.  But he acts like a nomadic hunter-gatherer of the Mesolithic Era.   

But in this case I'll excuse the reverse anachronism. In Episode 4.5, Robin flashes back to the day of his death.  He and two companions were attacked by a bear; he climbed a tree to escape, but was hit by lightning.

 Check out the chest of the caveman in the foreground.  Massive, and accentuated by the costume design. 

 He's worth a bit of research

Robin has two caveman companions in this episode. 

Dan King has only one acting credit, no photos, and a very common name.  There are many actor Dan Kings out there, as well as several p*rn stars.  A dead end.  So I'm going to go with Aaron Collict.

Aaron Collict has the chest for the job, but research is made difficult by his lack of Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, or TikTok pages.  At least he has several resumes posted online.  And a lot of n*de photos.

He's a model, actor, and personal trainer, with the tagline: "H*ng human being with a passion for endorphins."  Sorry, I meant "hungry."

He received a B.Sci. in Mathematics from the University of East Anglia in 2007, and has worked as an operations manager and film producer.  Currently he is a salesperson for Steady Solar, a solar-power company.

After modeling and doing commercials for Slater's Menswear, Hot Tub Barn, Oriel Mobile Valeting, and The Cutting Room, Aaron moved into tv with two reality programs:

More after the break. Caution: Explicit.

Topper Guild: The youtube star breaks into tv. With Kaido Roberts, muscle men, Nick d*ck, and Topper doing stuff.

 This post was completely innocent, but it got one of those idiotic "sensitive content" tags for no reason.  So I added some n*de photos and s*xual content, and moved the whole thing to RG Beefcake and Boyfriends.

Link to the "sensitive content."

Daniel DiMaggio: The queerbaiting son on "American Houswife" grows up to play Count Chocula and post selfies

 

Link to the NSFW version

You may be familiar with Daniel DiMaggio, no relation to Joe DiMaggio, as Oliver Otto on American Housewife (2016-21).  I never heard of it, but I wouldn't have watched anyway.  Who wants to watch a sicom about June Cleaver or Donna Reed?  

It starred Katy Mixon as Katie Otto, a housewife who, although not pretentious herself, is immersed in the ultra-pretentious world of ladies who lunch in Westport, Connecticut, along with her husband (Diedrich Bader), two daughters, and son Oliver (Daniel). 

She has a lesbian best friend, and there's a gay character (Jake Choi) in Season 5, so there's a bit of representation.  The main problem fans had was queerbaiting Oliver.  

He is presented as gay, with everything from pictures of muscular men on his bedroom wall to an interest in ballet to a boyfriend, the wealthy, femme Cooper (Logan Bell).  Everyone thinks they are boyfriends, including Cooper, who is upset every time Oliver claims that they are not dating.  But then he backs off and gets a girlfriend.  

Logan Bell (the femme one) is gay in real life, and states that he played Cooper as gay.  So why five seasons of "crumbs" that led nowhere?  Fans were irate when the showrunners were too cowardly to let Oliver come out.

Daniel already has two strikes against him (baseball metaphor, har har) for five years of queerbaiting.  Let's check on his other projects.

He was born in 2003 in Los Angeles, and began acting at age nine in the short Geisho (2010): a man (Horatio Sanz) wants to become the world's first male geisha.  Kind of gender-fluid.

Next, a 2013 episode of Burn Notice, which, I discovered today, is not about a hospital burn unit, in spite of the misleading title.  It's about a spy who was "burned" (fired). How the heck are potential viewers supposed to know that?   Daniel plays the young version of focus character Michael (Jeffrey Donovan). 

More after the break

Pizza Movie: A surreal update of the teen nerd genre, with no heterosexism or homophobia, lots of backsides, and Daniel Radcliffe as a butterfly

  

Link to the n*de dudes

Pizza Movie (2026), on Hulu, stars Sean Giambrone of The Goldbergs and Gaten Matarazzo of Stranger Things as college boys who accidentally get stoned on a weird drug.  I haven't seen a teen nerd movie for awhile; I wonder if they're still about the nerd winning the Girl of His Dreams with the help of his flamboyantly feminine best friend, while everyone throws homophobic slurs about.  It appears on a list of "The Top LGBTQ Movies to Watch This Spring," so maybe not. 

Scene 1: Room check in a college dorm.  A student stashes her drugs in a tin in the ceiling tiles. 

 Ten years later,  Montgomery (Sean) is frantically running across campus with a laundry basket.  He reaches the laundromat just in time to take all the quarters in the change machine.  When the Girl of His Dreams (Peyton Elizabeth Lee) arrives, he's  reading a book on How to Lower Your Testosterone, so he can impress her with his studliness when she asks for quarters.  Or you could just say hello.

"We're always here at the same time," she notes.  

"Well, nobody has dirtier underwear than me.  But not from poop...or pee, or c*m.  I'm not weird."  I'm just wondering what else could soil your underwear.

Scene 2: Montage of two guys chugging beer (outside, in the daytime); a girl thinking that a guy is sketchng her, but he's actuallly sketchng himself; and Jack (Gaten) being chased and bullied because he ruined the football team.  He tries to apologize, but they tape him to the clock tower and pelt him with water balloons full of pee (his suggestion).

Scene 3: The guys return to their dorm. Montgomery wants to "drown their sorrows" in a good night's sleep, while Jack wants to get drunk.  They're a superego/id  pair, got it.  I'm going to keep calling them Sean and Gaten, to make identification easier.

The housing requests for next year are due tonight.  They can choose from Orrick Tower, Stonewell Courts, or..ugh...the scary, crumbling Gralk Hall. 

Suddenly Sean is distracted by the Girl of His Dreams. "Just ask her out!" Gaten exclaims, no doubt for the 300th time.

"No way!  Hot girls only date Alpha guys, so I can't ask her out until I trick her into thinking that I'm an ALpha."  I'll bet she really likes the quiet, shy geeky types.

"But you don't know her.  How do you know that you have compatible interests?"

"Who cares?  She makes me feel like I'm floating on a cloud of lavender, being sung to by lollipop pixies."   Ugh.

Up to their room.  No posters of nekkid ladies.  They're just getting ready to drink, when  six bullies burst in, three girls and three guys, including Kevin Matthew Reyes (left).   "What's up, dildos?", the leader, Logan, announces.  A creative slur.  Not homophobic, which is a good sign.  

They come in every week to hold the guys down and fart in their faces in retaliation for the football incident.  In the struggle the drug tin from the ceiling falls down.

While sitting on the guys' faces waiting to fart, they discuss the "pajama party tonight."  They have beer and weed, and Lizzy (Lulu Wilson) is bringing Wizard's Oath, a Dungeon's and Dragons-style board game.  The others dismiss this idea.

As they leave, Lizzy looks back, sympathetic. 

 

I like the way that the guys have no problem with physical contact, even with Gaten's face two inches from Sean's privates, a welcome relief from the usual: "We accidentally touched hands!!!!  I'm going to be sick!!!!!"

Scene 4: The guys discuss how they are failures at college.  They should be popular, going to keggers and pajama parties, but everybody hates them.  Sean tries to make things better by ordering a pizza.  

Suddenly Gaten sees the tin that fell from the ceiling: it says "Mints," with a green, toothy smile.  Inside, tablets with a starburst image.  An internet search gets one hit, a youtube video with a "psychedelic adventurer" tell us about Mind Igniting Neural Tuning Stimulants (MINTS, get it?).  Sean is hesitant, but then she uses his "cloud of lavender" fantasy, and he's in.

Scene 5: The evil Head RA (Jack Martin) tells his subordinates about the "debauchery" infesting their school.  Is this RAs for the whole campus?  There are like 30 of them, all wearing black berets.

Meanwhile, in the dorm room, the bullies discuss how much the guys blow. Hey, the men and women aren't sitting together.  They are not romantic partners.  Sympathetic Lizzy tries to defend them, and is un-invited to the pajama party-- until she offers to provide a party bus. Then she rules.

There are too many plot twists to continue the scene by scene.  Here's the gist:

Turns out that Lizzy used to be the guys' friend.  They played Wizard's Oath every day at lunch.   Then she joined the cool kids and dropped them.  But she took the drug, thinking that it was a mint, now they're in it together.

Everyone hates Gaten because as team mascot, he was leading the football team on their traditional naked run, and decided to prank a professor that he hated.  They chased the guy out of the stadium and onto the street. past the police department on a "bring your daughter to work day."  They all had to register as s*x offenders. Wait -- why didn't the guys just stop at the stadium exit?

More after the break