Researching Lucas Brazzini, the obviously gay teen angst star from Brazil. How is he similar to Asher Angel? With a lot of teen angst d*cks

 

Link to the n*de photos

I was thinking of doing a profile of Asher Angel, whose Jonah  became the first canonical gay character on the Disney Channel in 2019, when he and his gay-subtext buddy Cyrus held hands in the series finale of Andi Mack (2019).  He later came out as bi.

 Just holding hands?  Kelvin and Keefe did that in "Righteous Gemstones" Season 2, right after the s*x scene, and fans continued to argue that they were straight buddies. 

But it turns out that I already reviewed Andi Mack.  How about Brazilian actor Lucas Burgatti who the teen idol website lists as "similar" to Asher Angel?  Presumably he played a gay character or is gay in real life.

Plus he has an impossibly buffed physique, and his Instagram photos are all about men.

Lots of men.

Hugging and kissing men.

And doing that weird duck-face thing where you suck in your cheeks and push out your lips as far as possible to look like duck beaks. My research indicates that the duck-face has a long history -- primates do it -- but most recently it is being used to imitate female social media influencers, who were trying to demonstrate how the lipstick they were promoting looked.

So when men do it, it's a femme/gay thing?

What about the very, very heavily publicized relationship between Lucas and Sophia Valverde in 2019, when they were both starring in the teen soap As Aventuras de Poliana?  It was mostly illustrated with photos of the two hugging while doing the duck-face, or Lucas kissing Sophia's cheek or the side of her head -- anywhere but her mouth.  I get it, buddy --  I was roped into a lot of dates with girls back in high school, and I always tried to avoid that gross kiss on the mouth.   

So obviously gay in real life.  Next, "Has he played any gay characters?"

Lucas is best known for hundreds of episodes of As Aventuras de Poliana (2018-2020) and its sequel, Poliana Moça (2020-22), "Poliana the Girl,"  with Sophia Valverde as the hapless orphan making friends and getting crushes on boys.  She has to choose between bad boy Eric  (Lucas) and poor-but-honest Joao (Igor Jansen).  

No gay characters.  Fans suggest a romance with Bento (Davi Campolongo), a "cultured, intelligent" boy who uses crutches and hides his piano-playing talent "out of shame."   But it would be purely subtextual.

More after the break. 

Mat Botuchis: The chest that launched a thousand fantasies plays gay-adjacent and sassy-pants, becomes an artist and puppeteer

This is the face and bare chest that launched a thousand romantic fantasies during the 1990s, as gay boys dreamed of holding hands, kissing and cuddling with Mat Botuchis (spelled with one t).

Unfortunately, Mat's only semi-shirtless shots came from the same photo shoot.  He didn't want to be a teen idol.  He wanted to be a serious actor.

Born in a suburb of Cincinnati in 1983, son of a radio salesman and a teacher, Mat got his start in local commercials, but at age 12 moved to Los Angeles to stay with his older brother -- and audition.  After two months and a few small roles, he got his big break, playing the werewolf-boy Eddie in the tv movie Here Come the Munsters, based on the 1960s movie-monster comedy. (Other Eddies include Jason Marsden, Mason Cook, Bug Hall, and the original, Butch Patrick).

Next came episodes of Goosebumps, The Journey of Allen Strange, Days of Our Lives, and Mat's second big break, 3 Ninjas: High Noon at Mega Mountain (1998), the fourth in the franchise about a trio of ninja brothers named Rocky, Colt, and Tum-Tum.  (Other actors who played Rocky include Michael Treanor and Sean Fox).  It didn't fare well with critics -- Collider rates it as one of the "worst action-adventure sequels of all time." but it got Mat some teen idol attention -- and that bare-chest photo shoot.

Now 18, Mat moved directly from teen idol cuteness to young adult sleaze with MTV's Undressed (1999-2002) was an anthology series about the romantic and s*xual relationships of high school and college students.  It was controversial at the time for mentioning the possibility that high schoolers might do things in the bedroom, and for stating that gay people exist.  Mat played the jerk Spike, who got herpes from one of his many one-night stands, in Season 4.

10 Attitudes (2001) was a mostly improv romantic comedy about a 30-ish West Hollywood guy (Jason Stuart) who ends his decade long relationship after his boyfriend cheats on him.  He makes a bet that he will find romance with one of the next ten guys he dates, or go back to Cleveland.  Unfortunately, he finds something wrong with each of the ten attitudes: #1 is a druggie;  #3 (David Faustino, Bud Bundy on Married...with Children) wants a bisexual three-way; %6 goes to bathhouses; #7 yells at the bartender; and so on. So he goes home to Cleveland, and finds true love with his old high school bully (Fritz Greves), now reformed and out. Mat plays the bully in high school.

More after the break

Marcus Scribner: Junior on "Black-ish" and "Grown-Ish" grows up, plays gay-ish characters, shows his stuff in some n*de photos

   

Link to the n*de photos

Black-ish (2014-22) starred Anthony Anderson as Dre Johnson, the head of an upper-middle-class Black family.  They are black-ish because they have to figure out how to maintain their Black identity while living in a ritzy all-white neighborhood.

Son Andre (Marcus Scribner) announces that he's converting to Judaism so he can have a Bar Mitzvah like his friends.

He starts dating a Republican girl, to the consternation of his liberal parents.

The kids hate Dre's favorite restaurant back in the hood.

They go on their annual Martin Luther King Day ski trip.

There were no gay characters other than Dre's lesbian sister (played by Raven Simone of Raven's Home), who visited once or twice per season, but Junior was queer-coded in spite of his occasional girlfriends.  He was an outsider, with quirky tastes, interests, and mannerisms that his family variously ridiculed, ignored, and worried about. Sounds like my parents with their "Go to work in the factory!" and "Get married and have kids!" rants.   

He had gay-subtext buddy-bonds with several guys, notably Zach (Nick Carson, who has a lot of muscular men but no women on his Instagram).

Marcus Scribner continued to play Junior on the spin-off Grown-ish (2019-24), which sends the kids to college.  Although he has a "will they or won't they" romance with a girl named Annika, Junior also has a gay-subtext buddy bond with Doug (Diggy Simmons).  Oddly, Doug is involved with his own "will they or won't they" romance. 

Fans continue to speculate that Marcus is gay in real life, so I checked his non-Black-ish work for gay characters.

Marcus has 27 acting credits listed on the IMDB, including episodes of Castle, New Girl, American Dad, and most recently, rookie cop Jonah Silver on Boston Blue (2025).

  TV Insider says that he "became close friends" with Sean Reagan (Mike Amonson) after they were both injured in a fire, and now he is a regular guest at the Silvers' shabbat dinners.  Sean has a female "love interest," so he's straight.  Jonah doesn't have any hetero-romances listed in the plot synopses, so maybe he is gay-ish.

Marcus has also done a lot of voice work:

Bell Zettifar in 5 episodes of Young Jedi Adventures: Nothing specified.

D'Angelo Baker in 38 episodes of Dragons: The Nine Realms:Gay according to the fan wiki, but straight according to Reddit.

Bow in 57 episodes of She-Ra and the Princesses of Power: a female "love interest," but according to an interview in Queerty, he's "s*xually fluid."  So gay-ish, but they couldn't say anything.

So, Question #1, any gay roles?  Just some subtexts and closets.

More after the break

Nutcracker Beefcake

When I was a kid, our church forbade movies, theater, carnivals, circuses -- basically anything that had a plot.  And my working-class parents disapproved of anything "long hair."  So ballet and opera were completely alien.

Except at Christmastime, when we would go to see "The Nutcracker" at Centennial Hall on the Augustana College campus, or at Rock Island High School, or both.  One year the Youth Symphony participated, so I got to be in the orchestra pit for eight full performances.

The plot is heterosexist -- Elsa receives a nutcracker shaped like a toy soldier for Christmas.  He comes to life, fights an army of mice, and reveals that he is actually a prince.  They return to his kingdom, the Land of Sweets, where he makes Elsa his queen.

But who pays attention to the plot?  No matter what people tell you, they go to ballets for one reason, and one reason only: to celebrate male or female beauty.  Dances in form-fitting tights, swaying and twisting, making every curve and muscle visible.

No other art, not even bodybuilding, displays the male physique so openly and extensively.  You don't just get a glimpse or a hint -- everything is out there, through the entire performance.

No wonder every gay kid in town, even those who were otherwise obsessed with sports, couldn't wait for Christmas.

Ballet dancers have mixed feelings toward The Nutcracker -- it is so darn cliched. "Dance of the Sugarplum Fairies" over and over and over. 

And the costumes are rather uncomfortable. 

More after the break

Daniel DeSanto: The gay kid in the Midnight Society, a Mean Girl, a Sicilian assassin, a short guy with a big ___. Who cares if he's straight?

  

Link to the n*de photos

Submitted for your approval: Nickelodeon's Are You Afraid of the Dark (1992-1996), an anthology of ghost and horror stories told by -- and evaluated by -- a group of teenagers called the Midnight Society.  

It aired at 5:30 pm on weeknights and 9:30 pm on Saturday night, so I didn't watch often, but I recall a few episodes. 

"The Tale of the Water Demon": Tony Sampson steals a gold watch, which draws the wrath of the water demon and threatens his gay-subtext buddy, Charlie Hofheimer

"The Tale of the Zombie Dice":  Jay Baruchel fights a video arcade owner who is shrinking teens and selling them as pets.

"The Tale of the Phantom Cab": While lost in the woods, Jason Tremblay (no relation to Jason Tremblay) stumbles upon a monstrous being who keeps teenagers captive unless they can solve a riddle.

And I recall three of the teen actors who appeared in the frame sections, squabbling, flirting, forming alliances:

Bookish intellectual Gary (Ross Hull, left), the leader.

Frank (Jason Alisharan) the leather-jacket bad boy

Prank-loving, irreverent Tucker (Daniel DeSanto, right), Frank's younger brother, who joins the Midnight Society in Season 3, and stays through the series finale.  He becomes the leader of the Midnight Society in the revival series (1999-2000).

You're probably expecting a profile of Ross Hull, who is gay in real life, and rather built; but Gary turned me off by crushing on Sam (a girl) and eventually dating her.  

Frank competed for Sam's affections, too. 

But Tucker never expressed any heterosexual interest; indeed, he seemed to have a "he's arrogant!" love-hate attraction to Frank. 

He pushes to get his friend Stig (Codie Wilbie) to be admitted to the group in Season 6.  In the revival series, he and his friend Quinn (Kareem Blackwell) found the new Midnight Society together.    

Plus his stories are about friendships that are threatened, or grow stronger, through paranormal peril.  A lot of gay coding for Nickelodeon in the 1990s.

I didn't follow any of Daniel's post-Dark works. Somehow I had the impression that he played Elaine's boyfriend Jake on Seinfeld (a recovering alcohol, he goes off the wagon due to Jerry's negligence, and seeks revenge).  But the episode aired in 1991, when Daniel was 11 years old.  Jake was actually played by David Naughton. 

When I was reviewing an episode of 100 Things to Do Before High School for my profile of Max Ehrich, I thought I saw him playing Mr. Roberts, the guidance counselor, but that's Jack De Sena

Our Daniel, a Toronto native, was a busy child and teen actor, specializing in horror for obvious reasons:

Gabe, who visits Egypt with his uncle and uncovers a mummy's curse in two episodes of Goosebumps (1995).

Theo in two episodes of The New Ghostwriter Mysteries (1997): he helps the gang and the ghost foil a corrupt cop, and later, thieves who target seemingly worthless items.

Zeke, a teenage theater employee who helps Taylor Handley foil The Phantom of the Megaplex (2000).  

More after the break

What has Ian Winningkoff been up to lately? Hint: you'll need several n*de dudes, one going downtown, to get through it all

  

Link to the n*de photos

In October 2023, I posted a profile of Ian Winningkoff: Young Chuck Montgomery in Righteous Gemstones Season 3, Classmate #2 in an episode of Secrets of Sulphur Springs, and Danny Zuko in a local production of Grease.  There were a lot of page views during the first week or so, and then they dwindled to near zero, the usual fate of profiles of actors who aren't particularly famous. 

 But during the last few days, the number of page views has skyrocketed, leading me to wonder if something has happened.  Did Ian get a starring role in a big production?  Did he come out?  Did he get arrested?

So let's check Ian's Instagram, his dad's Facebook page, and his high school website to see what he's been up to lately.

In the summer of 2024, Ian starred as Troy Bolton in a local production of High School Musical.

2024-25 was his senior year at Ben Franklin High in New Orleans.  We see him in January 2025, filling out a profile for the NCSA college recruiting website: "I love the game of basketball on a larger note then just playing, but my dream is to play for a college program."

And he's got a goatee that makes him look like a Disney villain.  Not just Disney:  Leonardo DiCaprio, Wes Bentley, Tom Cruise, Liam Neeson, Alan Rickman, and Spock got bearded up when their character went dark.

Mardi Gras, 2025: Ian is hanging with some rather hot homies, no girls. So, into guys, buddy? 

In April 2025, Ian's dad notes that he is starring in the 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee

A photo dump from April 2025 shows Ian hugging his buddy Xander, who will receive the Louis Armstrong Jazz Award and be named to the LHSAA All-Academic Team.  Quite an impressive boyfriend -- oh, wait, the rest of the photos show Ian hugging, kissing, and pretending to strangle a girl.

Next comes a n*de dude on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends.  You'll need it to get through what comes next:

May 2025, Ian's Senior Prom photo dump: multiple scenes of hugging, kissing, pretending to strangle, dancing in his underwear with, sticking his tongue out at, and licking the corsage of a girl. Here he winks so we will congratulate him on being heterosexual. 

More after the break.  

Tony Dow Beefcake, Part 2: The "Leave it to Beaver" big brother flexes, swims, sculpts, and struts with his boyfriend.

Tony Dow, who played big brother Wally to the Beaver (Jerry Mathers) on the iconic nuclear family sitcom Leave It to Beaver (1957-63),  was one of the few teen idols of the period to regularly be photographed shirtless. 

 He was already an athlete, a Junior Olympics diver, when he was cast, and during the five years of Beaver, he just kept bulking up.  He never appeared shirtless on the show itself, but he gladly obliged the teen magazines.

Afterwards he continued to act and direct, appearing on episodes of Quincy ME, Knight Rider, Love Boat, Charles in Charge, and Diagnosis Murder, but mostly in the various Beaver reboots, rehashes, sequels, and parodies. 

Later in life Tony pursued his passion for art, becoming an accomplished sculptor.  He specializes in both cityscapes and the human form.  Here's The Diver in bronze.

Gay men who saw Beaver during its original run are well past retirement age now, but generation after generation are introduced to the series through constant reruns -- you can watch it today on Roku and Peacock.  And others haven't seen the show, but they enjoy the hunkiness. 

Here Tony is wearing the same swim trunks as in the top photo, but in an exterior by the pool.

More after the break

The Mighty Nein: Animated D&D game with a ragtag fellowship, a n*ked Orc, a lot of gay/bi guys, and Riker from "Star Trek"

I saw The Mighty Men on Amazon Prime, and figured that it was about "the mighty men of old" mentioned in Genesis 6:4 -- a verse that always gave me a little stirring when I was a kid sitting in Sunday school or the morning church service.  

Mighty Men -- like Hercules on Saturday morning cartoons: 

Softness in his eyes, iron in his thighs,
Virtue in his heart, fire in every part
Of the Mighty Hercules.

Could we go back to the iron in his thighs again?  

By the time I figured out that it was The Mighty Nein,  I was already invested.  

Scene 1: Some veiled beings with cow-ears gather around a giant pulsating gem, and an Orc (Graham McTavish) holding his dying wife. There's always a dead wife. 

 They kiss; she swears that they'll be together again; he grabs the ceremonial knife and kills her.

Priestess: "As the body dies, the soul lives on for eternity with the Luxon."  

The gem absorbs her soul.  Husband: "I can't wait to see who you will become."  Is she getting reincarnated or moving on to the afterlife?  Make up your mind.

Scene 2:  Priestess yells that they've been breached -- "protect the beacon (gem)!"  A cultist grabs it and runs to a vault with a statue of another husband and wife.  The beacon/gem cleverly hides the husband's crotch.  

 He hides it and closes the vault -- just in time to be eviscerated by three warriors, Astrid, Dain (Matthew Mercer), and Eadwulf (Redchild).   They grab the beacon/gem, eviscerate some more guards, conjure a shadow-being to subdue the rest, evaporate doors, jump over tall buildings, and vanish another dimension.

Scene 3: Next stop, a wooden fort in the forest.  But their horses are supposed to be ready.  What's gone wrong?   Eadwulf and Astrid investigate.  Dain stays behind with the gem/beacon.  But he makes the mistake of looking at it (haven't you read any heroic fantasy?  It will possess you!).  

Meanwhile, Eadwulf and Astrid notice that everyone in the fort is dead.  "The Kyrin are here!  It's a trap!  Run!"  Too late -- the whole dimension explodes!

Some viewers may recognize the thieves from their many, many appearances in tv series, webseries, podcasts, video games, and online Dungeons & Dragons games, but I didn't, and it's not really necessary to understand this installment of their adventures.

Opening: Cut to the opening sequence, five-minutes long (which is standard for Japanese anime):  a fort on fire; a wounded guy sinking into the water; everyone smiling; a muscle guy; the Tarot card Death; a goblin jumping over its opponents; a redhead fighting; an Elf crying; a muscular tightrope-walker; a pink bunny pulling on a female being's antlers; an old guy, probably their Gandalf (I mean Dumbledore); a group shot.  

We only get the stories of three in the first episode.  All interspliced, but I'll separate them out.

Caleb and the Goblin

Caleb (Liam O'Brien), the redhead, is being bullied by two teenagers (Yuri Lowenthal, left, Rowan Atkins Downs).  He uses his magical powers to scare them off, then tries to pick the lock of the Mystic Banshee shop.  

Uh-oh, a Goblin picks his pocket.  Caleb chases it down, but it claims that it was just trying to help: the lock is booby-trapped, and would have killed him.  "Refill my flask, and I'll show you how to break into the magic shop."

The Goblin, Nott the Brave, is actually a halfling rogue/wizard under a curse.   Presumably there will be a big reveal at some point.

 It is voiced by Sam Riegel, who looks like a lady with a beard, but is apparently a cisgender man. 

Caleb and the Goblin wait for the owner of the magic shop to lock up and go home, and break in to look for the unspecified thing that he wanted: something guarded by a scary bat-being.  Hey, Caleb uses German words.  Shouldn't they all be speaking Westron or Elvish or something?

Uh-oh, the Goblin sees a poster: Caleb is wanted for murder, with the reward 100,000 gold pieces.  Should they turn him in?  Too late -- the shop owner returns and chases them out. 

They bond, and Caleb tells his back story: he and his friends Astrid and Eadwulf (remember them?) were students at the Magic Academy (and also in a three-way bisexual romance, but that isn't mentioned here).  The evil headmaster Ikithon had indoctrinated them so severely that when he ordered them to murder their parents as a final test of loyalty, he did.  Then he felt guilty and stumbled out into the night.  

 

Beau

Beau, the guy in blue on the far right, examines the destroyed wooden fort  where the thieves who stole the gem/beacon were splattered.  His Dwarf supervisor argues that it was "the damn Kriks," a racist term for the Kyrin (the cow-eared elves who kill their partners so their souls can be absorbed).

Beau uses his psychic powers to see the three thieves being splattered.  One of them, Astrid, survived the blast, and is watching.  Plus he finds two green gems that are used to intensify magic.  "This wasn't a Kyrin attack," he exclaims.  "It was someone from the Magic Academy!"

Dwarf Supervisor thinks that this theory is ridiculous.  "The Magic Academy is in our country!  Why would you attack your own people?"

A n*de phot of Omidi Abtahi, who plays the bartender in one episode, on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends.  I was looking for n*de photos of the actor who plays Beau, but it turns out that she is a female character, played by a woman. She has appeared in many D&D games, podcasts, and so on, so regular fans already know, but for new viewers it will be a Big Reveal later on.  

In some of the stories, Beau gets a girlfriend, but there's no mention of lesbian interest here.

More after the break

Gemstones Episode 2.7: Holding hands among the yurts, and eating pizza for desserts. With a n*de Jonathan Bennett bonus

 This is the G-rated version of the Episode 2.7 review

Go to the n*de version

In the last episode, Kelvin and Keefe were ejected from the God Squad and kicked out of their house, and Eli was shot several times and crashed his car. Gulp, he's dead!

When you get tired of discussing you know what: Whew, Eli's not dead after all, but he's in a coma. Jesse/Amber and Judy/BJ hug and cry at his bedside.  Kelvin is noticeably absent.  Then the siblings go out into the parking lot and throw up multiple times. followed by the partners.   Is this a common response to grief, or did they all have bad sushi for dinner?

Ok, we're not tired of discussing you kow yet:  We cut to Keefe trapped in the God Squad's tiger cage.  There are several openings to look through, but he prefers the glory h*le, as if awaiting his next customer.  This time, Sky pushes through, hitting him in the eye!  

Sky didn't really want you-know-what, he wanted to tease Keefe, demonstrating what he couldn't have.  The God Squad guys laugh and high-five each other.  In gay communities, and actually among heterosexuals also, the person who performs is often denigrated, considered physically and socially inferior. Keefe's activity with Kelvin apparently brands him as "a bottom." 

Keefe collapses, screaming in pain, and starts to cry.  He has died and gone to hell, being punished for Kelvin's sins -- a veritable Christ figure.  Note that Keefe undergoes a symbolic death and resurrection in every season.

When the God Squad guys leave, Kelvin appears with food and toiletries.  Interestingly, Keefe calls him by the formal "Brother Kelvin."  He isn't sure that he wants a romantic relationship with this guy who lets him suffer in a tiger cage instead of saying "Game's over! Let Keefe out!" and calling security if the God Squad resists.  But Christ-Keefe doesn't even suggest release; instead, he advises Kelvin that he's as powerful as Eli, just as Jesus was as powerful as his Father.  

Beauty and the Beast:  In church, Jesse announces that Eli was gunned down while driving on Long Point Road. Trivia note: This is a real road in a suburb of Charleston.  It leads past the Seacoast Church, a megachurch that closely resembles the Salvation Center. 

Afterwards, the family is at their post-church dinner at Jason's Steakhouse, when Kelvin arrives, wearing a dark purple robe, carefully holding his glass of orange drink. 

They yell at him for not being around late;y, but he isn't ready to show himself in public yet. "I am a beast!"  Jesse quips that the robe makes him look like the beauty from Beauty and the Beast.

Next they argue over who will fill the power vacuum left by Eli's absence, until Martin has had enough: "Can't you just be kind to each other? Self-absorbed, loud, arrogant fucking a*holes."  That's about the size of it.

Kelvin agrees:"Y'all are a bunch of a-holes."  Jesse points out that he was talking about "you, too, d*ck-lips."  The term refers to lips that would be especially nice to have s*x with: a call-back to the scene earlier, and yet another reference to Kelvin being gay.  

The Return of Baby Billy: After scenes where Judy promises to become a better person and Gideon announces that he's leaving to take a stunt job, BJ and Tiffany track Baby Billy's movements from his credit card statement.  He's in Winston-Salem, spending money at Sbarro, Bojangles, Tommy Hilfinger, Aeropostale, and the Fossil Watch Store.  Trivia alert: the dates were all in mid October, 2022. This episode aired on February 13, 2022.  

Tiffany can sound out most of the words; apparently BJ has been teaching her to read.  He has become a father figure. 

In Winston-Salem, Baby Billy is recording a commercial for his new scam, a coconut-flavored health elixir that will cure every disease, even COVID.  Dude, that's false advertising, a criminal offense. On his way out of the studio, BJ, Judy, and Tiffany accost him.  First he tries to hide; then he claims that he was trying to make money to support Tiffany and their son; then he assaults BJ and runs away. 

Jesse's Plan:  After discussing the possibility of blowing up Junior's house and having a heart-to-heart with Martin, Jesse reveals to the siblings his new plan: he'll tell the congregation and the news media that Eli is recovering, and give them his hospital and room number, so the listening Cycle Ninjas will know to where to strike again.  Except Eli won't be there: Jesse will clear the hospital and lay in wait, ready to gun them down. Can you really clear an entire hospital? The siblings think that it's a crazy idea, but he talks them into it: "Let's lie to the church like a fucking family." 

Cut to the ambulances and army jeeps moving Eli to the safe house. Which happens to be his own mansion; is that wise?  Judy, Amber, and the kids join him.

More after the break

Modern Family Episode 8.14: Alex is promoted, Cam is injured, and Phil dreams of parking lots. With a dozen gay actors, two short guys, and Nathan Fillion

  

Link to the n*de photos

We've been watching Modern Family, even without Adam Devine as Andy.  Last night's episode was 8.14, "Heavy is the Head" (2017) -- a little dated, but it had a lot of gay representation and beefcake.

The Phil/Jay Plot

Scene 1:  Phil (center) and his father-in-law Jay (right) are at the groundbreaking for his lifelong dream of building his own apartment complex, Dunphy Towers. Corporate guy Jared Cook approaches with an offer to buy the property for 20% more than they paid.  Phil says no, but Jay wants to play with him for a bit and get the offer up.

On RG Beefcake and Boyfriends: Jonathan Chase's backside in Another Gay Movie (2006)

Scene 2: Foreman Pete (Robert Baker, n*de on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends) found a sewer line running through Phil/Jay's property, so they can't dig the basement of the new apartment building.  Shouldn't they have checked that first?  Plus there are pockets of methane gas everywhere, bursting into flame at random moments.  The project will have to be scrapped.

Scene 3: Phil and Jay approach Jared Cook, the corporate guy who wanted to buy the property, and accept his offer.  Nope, he heard about the structural problems, and the deal is off the table. 

Scene 4: They decide to turn the space into a parking lot.  Problem solved.  Phil announces that this was his dream all along.  Really?

The Claire/Gloria Plot

Scene 1:  Claire has to be careful around her birthday, because her stepmother Gloria (who is the same age) keeps giving her dumb gifts, then complains that she doesn't appreciate them.  This year Gloria is giving her a spa day, which is ridiculous -- she hates that girly stuff.  So she claims that she's too busy.

Scene 2: Claire is the new CEO at her father's company, Pritchet's Closets and Blinds.  Her marketing manager, Ben (the incredibly cute Joe Mande), complains that the workers are going ballistic about the budget cuts.  No overtime pay?  No bagel?

"We didn't have the Christmas sales we expected."  Do people usually put closets under the tree?

"Maybe we could fire someone, like Kenny in the warehouse."

"No, I love him. He makes fun of you."

Claire holds a staff meeting and claims that she's making sacrifices, too,  like flying coach. And she's taking off her office door to indicate that she's always available.

Ulp, when she enters her office, Gloria is there, with a huge gourmet lunch. Now the staff won't believe that she's cutting corners!

Scene 3: While Ben stands guard, Claire rushes through her caviar-and-champaign lunch.  She thinks she's done, but no, Gloria has arranged for the spa to come to the office.  And Claire can't say anything, or Gloria will get hurt feelings. 

When the swishy masseur Joshua (Artie O'Daly) appears, a worker asks who he is.  "Um..he's applying for a job as a forklift operator.  There are lots of gay forklift operators." 

Joshua:  "I'm not gay!"  

Left: Artie O'Daly is gay in real life. He is currently starring in the youtube sitcom Bad Boy, with Blase Maffia III.

Scene 4: The massage, plus a manicure. Claire is starting to unclench, but assistant Ben is having more and more trouble keeping the workers out: "Your girlfriend's office smells like truffles."

"My girlfriend is your boss, and she is not my girlfriend."

More after the break

The Brothers Ferox: A bodybuilder, a swimmer, and the Joker's nemesis walk into a gladiator arena. With bonus n*de short guys

  

Link to the n*de dudes

In Episode 1.1 of Spartacus: House of Ashur, a dwarf gladiator team called Brothers Ferox (shouldn't that be Frates Ferox?)  fight Ashur's champion Logus  (Joe Davidson, right).  He yells "My c*ck stands larger threats!",  thinking that they'll be easy to defeat, but they best him, and further humiliate the House by urinating on his corpse.

We see them briefly in Episode 1.2.  The gladiator Achillea is assigned to fight them, but after she fends off an attempted rape by Creticus (Stephen Madsen) -- and slices off his private parts -- she has to fight Korris first, and is killed in the arena.  

The brothers appear in every future episode; hopefully we will see more of their fighting, and some of their lives outside of the arena. 

I'll profile each of the actors separately: Daniel Bos (center) as Balbus, Leigh Gill (right) as Satyrus, and Mikey Thompson (left) as Musicus. 

Daniel Bos, from Perth, Western Australia, has been competing in the Paralympics since he was 12 years old. In 2025 he beat two Oceanic records at the World Para-Powerlifting Championship in Egypt.

He is also a competitive bodybuilder, seen here with his competition-tan.

Spartacus: House of Ashur is Daniel's first acting gig, but he calls it "the best thing I've ever done," and is anxious for more.

The heavily inked Leigh Gill, sharing a hot tub with an equally inked buddy or boyfriend, has 27 acting credits listed on the IMDB.  He is best known as the hetero-horny actor Bobono in Game of Thrones (2018) and Gary Puddles, a clown traumatized by his gay-subtext friend's murder, in two Joker movies (2019, 2021).

N*de photo of the buddy or boyfriend on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends.

More after the break