Pluribus: When the hive mind takes over, lesbian romance novelist Carol gets mad. With n*de guys from Paraguay and Mauretania

  

Link to the d*cks

Apple Plus has a good track record of quirky puzzle-shows, like Severance, Shrinking, and now Pluribus (2025): An alien virus transmitted from a world 600 light years away transforms all of humanity into a hive mind, a single consciousness.  Well, except the 886 million who died during the Joining, including romance novelist Carol Sturka's girlfriend.  

The Survivor: Carol is one of the 12 individuals in the world who didn't join.  As the Others work round the clock to find out why and develop a cure, they flash crazy Stepford Wife smiles, speak in unison, and give her anything she asks for.  Bring a hand grenade, no problem.  They have emptied out all of the stores for more efficient resource distribution, but when she wants to shop at her favorite supermarket, they re-stock it. 

Maybe they are so accommodating because when Carol gets angry, they start to cry.  Every body in the world.  When she yells, they have a seizure, and thousands of bodies die. So it's best to keep her calm.

About Them: The Others send Zosia, a body that looks like a female version of Carol's romance novel hero, to help her understand the new reality:

1. They have complete memories of everyone who was alive at the Joining, including details that no one would remember: "A waiter who served you on March 12, 2015 remembers that you liked this dish."  

2. Because the Others have every memory, every training, any available body can performs any necessary task.  Don't some task need muscle memory, too?  The first time Carol flies, the body of a donut girl is her pilot.  Later, to to make her more comfortable, they find the bodies of former pilots.

3. The Others cannot hurt living beings, including plants, so they are surviving on the stocks that already existed at the Joining, windfall fruit, and protein derived from dead bodies.  Well, the bodies aren't performing useful functions anymore, so why not use them?  How did they survive on their home planet?

4. They cannot lie, but when Carol asks "is there a way to reverse the process?", they get so upset that they vacate Albuquerque, and will only communicate via recordings and drones: "Our feelings for you haven't changed, but we need some space."

Mr. Diabaté:  Most of the individuals who didn't Join (and survived) are anxious for the Others to devise a cure, and criticize Carol's efforts to "save the world."   Mr. Diabaté, from Mauretania, has adopted a sybaritic lifestyle, flying around in Air Force One, pretending to playhigh-stakes poker games ("Stay in character!"), and inviting the bodies of former supermodels into his hot tub.

He's from Mauretania because actor Samba Schutte (top photo and left) was born in Noaukchott to a Mauretanian mother and a Dutch father.  Samba grew up in Ethiopia, studied at the Utrecht School of the Arts in the Netherlands, and moved to the U.S. in 2011.  You may recall him as Roach in Our Flag Meets Death.  

Straight in real life.

Mauretania is an Islamic Republic, formerly part of French West Africa, mostly desert, and rather repressive: converting to another religion, or promoting atheism, is a capital crime.  You don't want to know the official attitude toward LGBT people, so let's just look at a Mauretanian guy (d*ck on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends)

Manousos:  Survivor Manousos, from Paraguay, refuses any help from the Others.  They bring food everyday, and he throws it out.  He prefers to scavenge from neighboring apartments, always leaving payment for what he takes.  When he discovers that Carol is looking for a way to "save the world," he sets out to visit her in Albuquerque, Estados Unidos.  The Others offer to fly him, but he insists on driving himself -- leaving payment for the cars he commandeers.  

There are no roads in the 60-mile Darien Gap, between Colombia and Panama, so he walks, and is severely injured by the bacteria-laced spikes of a chunga palm tree.  They provide emergency medical care, but the moment he awakens in the hospital, he insists on paying for his treatment, commandeers an ambulance, and sets out again.

More after the break

Merrick Hanna: The Deity of Boy-Girl Romance has 345 billion social media followers. Do they like his dancing, his acting, or his other stuff?

   

Link to the not fully clothed photos

I don't know who Merrick Hanna is, but he has 6,000 photos on the teen idol site, including some shirtless.  Obviously straight: 90% of the photos show him with a girl.  Usually he's just standing there, grinning with delight at being the object of worship, while the girl hugs, kisses, fondles, and gazes at him, or pretends to be a beaked bird to demonstrate that she's much better than the rest of us poor mortals, the girlfriend of a deity.

Left: In addition to words about body parts, end-of-the-date activities, the Supreme Being, and being not alive, the censors have suddenly started to disapprove of the word for this beaked bird, I guess because it sounds too much like another word.

But it's not just worship: the girl takes the initiative, forcing him to b*lly dance and bake a cake.  They appear together at formal events, spin for Christmas, eat hamburgers, fight monsters, claim to be serial k*llers, go on rides at Disneyland. 

Here they appear to be having dinner with a gay couple.

Here he's alone.  The girlfriend must be taking the picture.

I should have dropped him as a potential profile right away, but I was fascinated.  Usually there are only a few photos with the girlfriend, or at most half of the collection.  Here they go on and on and on.  Why go through the trouble of having someone take and post hundreds of photos of your girlfriend? 

If I go back about a year on his Instagram, I run into a period of photos of Merrick alone or with guys, but then it's back to being hugged, kissed, and licked by a previous girlfriend.  Or maybe the same one?

What is this guy famous for?  I mean, you can't just worship someone out of nowhere.  He's got to turn water into wine or feed 5,000 people, or at least be big where it counts, right?

Google says that he's "a talented dancer known for his robot style," which he showcased on TikTok beginning when he was 12 (so in 2017).   Currently he has 32 million followers and 718 million TikTok likes.

According to the IMDB, he's competed on AGT, SYTYCD, Das Supertalent, and Lip Sync Battle Shorties.  I imagine that if I was in his main audience, I would know what those shows or competitions are.

He began acting in summer productions of Much Ado About Nothing and A Winter's Tale with the Intrepid Theatre Company in Victoria, British Columbia (2014, 2016), and moved on screen with music videos and short films in 2017.

Some teencoms followed, like Sydney to the Max and Team Kaylie.

More after the break

Free Bert: A chunk comedian, a hot model boyfriend, and gay-friendly actors. What could go wrong? With what to do when you're missing a ___

 

Link to the n*de photos

I'm following Braxton Alexander on Instagram because he appeared in two scenes in Season 3 of The Righteous Gemstones, and I thought his character was queer coded.  Also he never posts any photos of him with a girlfriend, ever, so probably gay, right?  

He's been pushing his fans to watch Free Bert (2026), a Netflix series based on the comedy routines of Bert Kreischer.  Bert is known for ripping off his shirt (I like that) and getting fully n*de (I like that, too).  And here he appears to be pretending that his popsicle is a d*ck.

Bert's d*ck and backside are on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends.

Several of the cast members have played gay characters or appeared in gay-friendly projects, so doubtless there will be some LGBTQ representation. 

 Plus episodes are set at a pool party and during a "boys' weekend," so there are bound to be some hunks in Speedos (maybe even Braxton, who has never yet appeared shirtless on screen or in a modeling shoot).  

I binged the whole series in two days, so I'll review it by plot thread, not by episode.

Bert Takes His Shirt Off: We begin with Bert performing at the birthday party of frequently n*de hunk Rob Lowe.  The guests don't care about his comedy set; they just want him to take off his shirt, over and over. "It's comedy gold," Lowe assures him, but Bert feels like an object.  What about his clever observations? I don't get it.  Why would you want to see a guy with his shirt off unless you found him attractive? 

Back home, Bert's wife LeAnn (Arden Myrin of The Righteous Gemstones) suggests that he tone down the f* word , put a shirt on, and try to be respectable, since they are sending their daughters Georgia and Ila (Ava Ryan, Lilou Lang) to an upscale private school.  It has a Learning Disability Department, which Ila needs.  

A Certain Act: Trouble begins when daughter Georgia is ignored at school, so Bert plays her up on a podcast. The host asks if the 14-year old has engaged in a certain act.  "No, she's a good girl."

The next day, campus Mean Girl Kiersten has told everyone Georgia's shocking secret.  She is despondent: "My life is over.  What boy will look at me now?"  So not doing this act is  disgraceful for a girl?

Bert gets revenge during his act by criticizing the d*ck size of the Mean Girl's Dad, ultra-rich Landon Vanderthal (not Reggie Van Snoot?).  The bit goes viral, and the Headmaster calls both sets of parents to a conference.  Landon insists that his d*ck is very big, and he's willing to whip it out right there as proof.  Things escalate; Georgia is suspended, and Bert banned from the campus.

Left: Landon is played by Chris Witaske, straight but the creator of the gay-friendly Chicago Party Aunt.

A Missing Body Part:  Back at school, Georgia steals the Mean Girl's boyfriend, Zac (Braxton).  Bert goes berserk.  He's banned from the campus, but he sends his wife to flirt with the security guard, marches into the locker room, and threatens to hurt the boy.  But then he discovers that Zac has a missing body part so he can't have s*x. 

Nonsense.  If you don't have that body part, you get testosterone replacement therapy. and everything works fine.  How does he think transmen do it?

More after the break. 

Roger Mobley: Child star buddy-bonding, teen idol gazing at girls, Disney Adventure Boy, Green Beret

In spite of a few bright spots, such as Boyne Castle, Disney movies in the 1960s were overwhelmingly heterosexist. Disney Adventure Boys -- and there was a stable of them -- offered an aggressive conflation of muscles and heterosexual ravings.  The stand out hetero star was Roger Mobley.

Born in Evansville, Indiana in 1949, Roger began performing with his siblings in carnivals and county fairs, and on Ted Mack's Original Amateur Hour, a sort of radio precursor of American Idol.  

This led to many guest spots on the popular tv series of the day -- Hawaiian Eye, Donna Reed, Gunsmoke, The Detectives, The Virginian-- plus a starring role in Seasons 3 and 4 of Fury (1958-60), a "boy and his horse" Western.  Peter Graves played a rancher in modern-day California, a single dad raising his adopted son Joey (Bobby Diamond).  Fury was a "wild" stallion who won't be ridden, but doesn't mind saving the day.  Roger played the son's friend, Packy.

He starred in Emil and the Detectives (1964), based on the novel by Erich Kastner: After his 400 marks are stolen, rich kid Emil (Bryan Russell) follows the thief to Berlin.  He thwarts a bank robbery with the help of his gay-subtext buddy, the street urchin Gustav (Roger).

In 1964, Roger became a Disney Adventure Boy, appearing in six of the movies broadcast in installments on episodes of The Wonderful World of Disney.

For the Love of Willadean (1964) Rural

l boy Harley (Roger) tries to win the Girl of His Dreams, but his rivals trick him into stealing a prize watermelon, and then into braving a haunted house.  Future Lost in Space kid Billy Mumy plays his buddy. 

Next Roger started on his most famous character, Gallagher, a Gilded Age newsboy who first appeared in an 1891 story by Richard Harding Davis, then in two silents, Gallegher: A Newsboy Story (1917) and Let'Er Go, Gallegher (1928)

More after the break

"Knight of the Seven Kingdoms": Some bare backsides, some d*cks, and queerbaiting in this magic-free prequel to "Game of Thrones"

   

 

Link to the n*de dudes

I turned off Game of Thrones (2011-2019), a fantasy series on MAX, after the first five minutes.  First Peter Dinklage remains fully clothed as he does stuff with a non-fully clothed lady.  He chats with her over a closeup of her stuff before leading her to his bedroom, where three more not-fully clothed women are waiting.

Then Emilia Clarke gets not fully clothed so her brother can feel her stuff in close-up twice.  When he leaves, her backside fills the screen as she steps into the bathtub.

Ugh.  This was impossible!

But I heard that the prequel, The Knight of the Seven Kingdoms (2026), features a gay-subtext buddy bond between a Hedge Knight (Peter Claffey who played the straight guy in the gay-friendly Wrecked) and a character whose name I don't recall (the names all sound alike).  I'll give it a try, but the first bouncing breasts, and I'm outta here.

Episode 1, Scene 1:  A Hedge Knight (not attached to a prince) is digging a grave for his mentor, Ser Arlan of Pennytree (Danny Webb, d*ck on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends).  Isn't Pennytree one of those "everything for a dollar" stores?

It's raining, because even thousands of years ago in a galaxy far, far away, tired cliches rule: it always rains at funerals.  

Hedgie takes the guy's sword, because why bury it with him, and asks his horses what they should do now.  Maybe enter a tournament?  Why can't you keep on being a hedge knight?

He pauses to get not fully clothed, and does bathroom stuff.  Nice backside, but we actually see the results coming out. 

Scene 2: Hedgie approaches a inn, and orders a bald boy wearing a dress to take care of his horses.  The boy sneers and insults him.

Mr. Grant: "You got spunk.  I hate spunk!"  

The inn is empty except for a guy who is passed out drunk, because everyone is gone to the tournament at Ashford.

Uh-oh, the drunk guy comes to and says "Stay the f*ck away from me!", brandishing a knife.  Hedgie is shocked, but doesn't engage, and the guy stumbles up to his room.  I assumed that this was the gay-subtext boyfriend, but the guy doesn't appear again.  This scene was just padding. 

Scene 3: Hedgie catches the Bald Boy on his horse, playing at being a knight, and yells at him.  The Boy wants to come along as his squire; Hedgie refuses. 

"Please?  You're poor,  incompetent, and very stupid. You need a squire."

"Nope."

They will eventually get together.  But this isn't the boyfriend -- actor Dexter Soll Ansell is only eleven years old.  And not bald in real life (the character has shaved his head to avoid being identified as the Chosen One, I think.  His biography on wikipedia is endless and exceedingly complex.)  

Scene 4: Off again.  Don't they have roads in this world?   Hedgie reaches the tournament, a lot of tents in the middle of nowhere, with people doing artisan-style work, like at a Renaissance faire.  He meets with the Master of the Tournament, who thinks he doesn't look like a knight. 

"I'm a knight,  Ser Dunk, knighted by Ser Arslan of Pennytree."  Ser Dunk, har har.  Better than Aslan.

"Never heard of him.  Are you sure you were knighted?"

"Um...um...sure...as his life was ending, Ser Arslan performed the ritual."  We don't see it happening in a flashback.  I think Ser Hedgie is bluffing. 

Master notes that knighthood is sacred.  If you lie about your knighting, they hang you by your hands and feet and lower you onto a sharpened stick.  Could we see that?

Then he laughs.  He was just kidding about the sharpened stick, but you need someone to attest to your knight master.  Would anyone here know him?

"Sure, Ser Manfred of the House of Dodarrion."

"If he vouches for you,  I'll let you enter the tournament."

Scene 5: Outside Ser Manfred's tent: Two pleasure ladies tell Hedgie that the Ser is napping.  They think he's come around because the Ser did things with  his wife, and then mock him for being a hedge knight; "He's got to sleep in hedges because no Lord will have him."

This hurts Ser Hedgie's feelings.  "No need to say mean things!" 

"Toughen up!  The Ser will awaken by evenfall (dusk).  Come back then."

Scene 6: At the practice pavilion, the redheaded a-hole Ser Steffon (Edward Ashley) bests the teenage Raymun (Shaun Thomas. right), kicks him, and curses him, then sees Hedgie watching and yells the Medieval equivalent of the "What are you looking at" threat.  I don't like how their names are almost but not quite English. Shows lack of creativity. 

Raymun  tells Hedgie that he is the A-hole's cousin and squire: "You look pretty hot...um, I mean cute...no, strong! Would you like to fight him?"  Hedgie refuses, and Raymun vanishes.  Darn it, I thought he was going to be the boyfriend.

Scene 7:  At evenfall, Ser Manfred is still not awake.  The pleasure girls fling some more insults, but Hedgie fights back, sort of: "Why are you being so mean?"  

"Aww, don't cry.  We insult all men. It's part of the job." Apparently guys really like women who dislike them.

More after the break

"Breaking Fast": Gay Muslim gets dumped, finds a new boyfriend, shows his d*ck. But are any of the actors actually gay and Muslim?

 

Link to the n*de photos

In the short Breaking Fast (2015), it's Eid-al-Fitr, the last night of Ramadan, and Mo (Ryan Shrime) runs into Cal (probably gay bodybuilder Tom Berklund).  They discuss the suicide of Cal's boyfriend.  

That's all I can gather from Tom Berklund's demo reel: the movie is not available to stream, and the trailer is stuck behind paywalls and Trojan-infested websites.  But a review says that Mo is a gorgeous Superman-obsessed doctor dealing with tragedy (because all short films are about dealing with tragedy, right?), and the guys fall in love.

We don't have a lot of actors who are gay, out, and Muslim, so I thought I would check Ryan Shrime out.

Ryan's  Instagram starts off with three photo dumps of Christmas decorations. Dude is Christian

Then he visits Portugal and Israel with his travel buddy, a miniature Jesus.  Dude is Christian and wacko.

Next there are about 3,000 photos hugging and kissing ladies and playing with kids.  Dude is straight.

Why are you playing a gay Muslim, buddy?  Are you the only Arab-American actor willing to do it?  

Sigh.  Let's check for gay roles and nude photos anyway.  

Ryan got his degree from Harvard, then studied at the Royal Academy of Dramatic Arts.  

Theatrical credits: Macbeth, King Lear, Much Ado About Nothing, The Engine of Our Ruin, The Ants

Nothing overtly gay themed there.

He founded the Middle Eastern Comedy Festival and the New York Arab American Comedy Festival

61 acting credits on the IMDB: The Mindy Project, Sam & Kat, Revenge, Grey's Anatomy, Madame Secretary, On My Block, and a lot that I don't recognize.  He complains on Threads that casting agents constantly tell him, "You're so great! I'm just looking for the right role for you," then offer yet another terrorist role.

He is known for playing:

Lance Chambers on a 2015 episode of Gray's Anatomy: Meredith returns to Seattle to announce Derek's death (Patrick Dempsey) and gives birth; Amelia deals with her grief; April decides to stay in a war-torn country, upsetting Jackson (Jesse Williams); Ben and Bailey argue over an end-of-life decision. Oh, and Richard proposes to Catherine.  Lance is not mentioned in the plot synopses.  Would there even be room for him?

Ramjin Azizi on a 2017 episode of Madame Secretary, starring Tea Leoni as the Secretary of State: Blake comes out as bisexual, Stevie (a boy) misses a meeting with the Harvard Dean of Admissions when Jason gets sick, and Henry goes to Israel to retrieve the bio weapon, but ISIS agents steal it. Ramjin isn't mentioned in any of the plot synopses, but I'm guessing that he's not a terrorist.

Ryan is also known as the producer of Woe (2020): A brother and sister stumble upon their father's secret after his death. A review says that it's impenetrably art-noveau.  Well, the guy graduated from Harvard.  What do you expect?

At least he shows his d*ck (on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends).  Or is that misleading, too?

In 2020, writer/director Mike Mosallam released a feature-length Breaking Fast, with the parts recast.  It's not available to stream, either, but a review gives us a few more details:  Mo (Haaz Sleiman) got dumped by his boyfriend (Patrick Sabongui) on the first night of Ramadan, and is now emotionally closed off.  Until he meets Cal (Michael Cassidy), who is grieving over his dead boyfriend.  The two bond during the three nights of Eid al-Fitr.

Any actual gay Muslim guys here?

More after the break

Paul Michael Barnes: Bo Duke's good ol' boy buddy likes dolls and disco. With Locke backside, Duke d*ck and Kentucky boys

 

Link to the n*de photos

I started researching Paul Michael Barnes based on this photo, which I thought identified him as a Barbie girl, so probably gay.  On a closer look, it says "Hillbilly Barbie is my Pa." 

Hillbilly Barbie is a 2010 pink label collectible Barbie based on Ellie Mae Clampett (Donna Douglas) of The Beverly Hillbillies.  

So your daddy is a lady?  Way to subvert gender polarization, buddy. 

It didn't take long to figure out that Paul Michael is straight, but I continued the research, as he became more and more incongruous.  Shockingly incongruous.

 His girlfriend's shirt reads "Cash, Hank, Willie, Waylon," four country-western greats.  Do a lot of boys like both country-western music and playing with Barbies? 

Paul calls himself Little Bo Duke, after  the "good ol' boy, never meaning no harm," who zoomed through rural Kentucky in their Confederate flag racecar, General Lee, in The Dukes of Hazzard (1979-85).   He was played by John Schneider (the one with the...um...blond hair) and  Sean William Scott.  His boyfriend.. um...cousin was played by Tom Wopat.

Here the boys sit in their car, the General Lee, without any clothes on (n*de on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends)

But there is no Little Bo Duke character in the tv series or the 2005 movie.  So why does Paul call himself Little Bo Duke?

Because he looks like John Schneider?  

Because they've worked together several times, most recently at the Cahoots Christmas show in Lebanon, Kentucky in December 2025? (not shown; I went with the guy with the muscles).

Or because he's a good ol' boy himself, from Berea, Kentucky, about 40 miles south of Lexington. 

In 2024, Paul performed "Okie from Muskogee" at the Rural Heritage Tobacco Festival in Lancaster, Kentucky.

We don't smoke marijuana in Muskogee.
We don't take our trips on LSD
We don't burn our draft cards down on Main Street
Cause we like living right and being free

Harriet Beecher Stowe used the Kennedy House in Lancaster as her inspiration for the Shelby Plantation in Uncle Tom's Cabin.

Can't get more Good Ol' Boy than that.

More after the break

Gemstones Episode 1.7: Keefe is in love, Gideon is bi, Scotty is excited, and everybody does gay stuff. With a Thai guy bonus.

  

Link to the n*de photos 

In Episode 1.6, after the blackmail plot fell through, Gideon and Scotty came up with a plan to steal the $3,000,000 in offerings that the church receives during the Easter service.  Gideon had doubts, but then Scotty showed up at his parents' house, pretending to be a friend visiting from California! 

Title: "And yet one of you is a devil."  From John 6.70. Jesus is complaining that he chose 12 disciplines, and one will betray him.  I guess we know who the devil is.

Prayer Power: A flashback to the Prayer Power Convention in Atlanta.  Gideon comes into the hotel room, upset: he was planning to have dinner with his Dad, but Jesse ditched him to play drinking games with his crew.  Jesse insults him, ridicules his upcoming internship and "California dreams," and orders him out.  On the way, Gideon sets his camera to take the video he would use for blackmailing.  So he didn't run away; the family knew that he had an intership set up. Why did Jesse act as if it was a big mystery?

Whoa, listen to the background song as Gideon walks down the hall: "You and me were meant to be."  He and Scotty are canonical boyfriends!

Gideon the soul-winner: In the present, Scotty is having dinner with the family.  He explains that he came to South Carolina for a stunt job, but he "got banged up" and had to drop out.  Then he says that he came to see Gideon, who brought him to Christ. The family is so overjoyed that the "prodigal son" has become a soul-winner that no one notices the contradictions.

Uh-oh, Jesse recognizes Scotty from somewhere!  His cover is almost blown, but Scotty claims that he had a recurring role as a rapist on CSI Miami.  Rapist -- interesting choice, since CSI is about murder (you gather forensic evidence from the crime scene).  Scotty is painting himself as a predator.  I wonder if Gideon is his latest victim.

Amber insists that he stay with them. Gideon protests, but Scotty touches his hand, and he consents.  So, Scotty, do you want a guest room, or would you prefer to share Gideon's bed?

We cut to a scene of Eli giving the siblings their Easter assignments; Judy will sing during the collection, Jesse will preach the sermon, and Kelvin has to lead a youth group song and dance number, which angers him (he's the youth minister; what did he expect?)

Shirt on, shirt off:  In the morning, Scotty and Gideon stop at the security station on their way out of the compound.  Hey, Scotty has his arm on Gideon's shoulder.   Everybody who sees them will think that they are a romantic couple.   Scotty flirts with security guard  Brock: "If you get to L.A., I'll get you an agent."  But he needs head shots, shirtless shots, and so on.  This is way more than Scotty needs to get access to the compound.  He just wants to see Brock's junk.

I'm gonna be excited: Cut to the guys having dinner (score: three dinners for Scotty/Gideon, none for Kelvin/Keefe).  They discuss the plan: on Sunday morning, after the offering is counted, Gideon and Martin will take it down the service elevator to the vault.  Scotty will be waiting, wearing his devil's mask, and rob them.  How will he get out of the church, with thousands of people milling about?

"As soon as the elevator door opens," he promises, "I'm gonna be..."  He'll be aroused  

"Nothing too big," Gideon cautions.  He can't help his size, dude.

To make it believable and not implicate Gideon, Scotty suggests tying him up, and using a few P-whips. This term is not defined online. 

Scotty has more news: He got the tape fixed, so he can do the original blackmail plan in addition to robbing the church. "This is what you always wanted," he says. "We destroy your old man."  Gideon is not so sure that he wants Jesse destroyed.

Tell TJ to walk out: Cut to Judy announcing to Baby Billy that they will be performing during the Easter service. But Baby Billy doesn't want to: "too little, too late."  BJ protests, and Billy orders him to leave.  Judy agrees: "You're making me look like an idiot.  Go outside!"  Uh-oh, disrespecting your boyfriend.  Since the Kelvin/Keefe plot runs parallel, we should be expecting some discord in their relationship soon.

Billy continues: "Your Daddy is a fame wh*re.  He'd do guy stuff in the middle of town square if he thought it would make him famous forever. He'd do it with ten guys."  Being outed as gay or bi is the most embarrassing thing Billy can think of. This may suggest a general attitude of homophobia that will make Kelvin's coming out difficult.

Part of the Family: Jesse takes everyone  out on his yacht.  Scotty complements the family on how close they are,  His own dad is in prison.  Jesse offers to be his Daddy, and hugs him.  Eli never once hugged Keefe.  Of course, it's just an act; Scotty waggles his tongue at Gideon over Jesse's shoulder, a vulgar gesture similar to what Keefe experienced at the sports bar.  Wait -- is he teasing Gideon, or offering to do guy stuff with him?

Is it all an act?  Scotty seems to like being part of the family.  The background song tells him: 

The days are getting brighter – the sunlight feels like gin.

Juices punch and cider shiver deep within

You don’t have to be alone, when we’re having so much fun.

Don’t be alone

The Prayer Circle: Just before the Easter service (17,000 people in the Salvation Center, six million world wide), Eli, the siblings, their partners, and Martin have a prayer circle, Kelvin/Keefe are holding hands and praying.  Scotty is holding Keefe's hand and glaring.  Why isn't he standing next to Gideon, his "friend"? 

I Have to Be a Man:  We see a few moments of Levi's Christian rock number, then switch to Kelvin leading the teens in their song-and-dance.    Keefe, working security in the bleachers, seems to be making an "I love you" gesture. 

Meanwhile, Gideon is in the bathroom, throwing up, and Judy rejects Eli's offer of singing during the offertory.

Cut to Judy's dressing room.  She criticizes BJ for asking if she's ok.  He counters that he is not even religious, but he has always been there for her.  She continues to berate him for attempting emotional support until he's had enough and leaves: "I have to stand up for myself.  I have to be a man." He starts crying and runs away. Judy throws her engagement ring after him.  .

"What is a man?" is an ongoing question of the season.  It was discussed in Gideon's "welcome home" dinner.  Kelvin declares that he is "a man" frequently.  The definitions are contradictory: being muscular; controlling your emotions; being in charge; standing up for yourself; being heterosexual.  Maybe we'll get a resolution when the episode continues.

My Gay Son: While the opening numbers are going on upstairs, Gideon decides to "come clean."  Except Jesse thinks he means being gay, and exclaims "I love my gay son."  Before Gideon has a chance to respond, Martin drags him away.  There has been no indication to this point (or ever during the series) that Gideon is straight.  Maybe viewers are supposed to conclude that he actually is gay, thus drawing attention from Kelvin and Keefe.

Cut to Jesse's sermon: We hear a lot about Christ's suffering, but what about the suffering of Judas?  Most people think that he was driven by evil, "perhaps guided by the devil himself," but maybe he was driven by pain. Imagine his agony, knowing that he had betrayed his friends and loved ones.  

The most obvious parallel here is Gideon betraying his Dad, guided by Scotty (wearing his Devil mask), driven by pain rather than evil.  But what about Scotty? Isn't he betraying his friend by forcing him to participate in this wild robbery scheme?  

Feeling guilty, Gideon decides to back out of the plot; he ditches Martin and the money, and goes down the service elevator alone to explain.  Scotty is irate, and starts insulting him.  Gideon has had enough of his abuse..  They fight.  Scotty puts him in a sleeper hold saying "Go to sleep, you little cute c*ck sucker." Interesting choice of words.  If he just said "c*ck sucker," it might be an all-purpose slur, but adding "little" and "cute" implies that Gideon has actually done guy stuff with him.

Gideon eventually manages to best Scotty and walk away, calling him a fraud.  You are not who you pretend to be: this will be repeated later, with Kelvin and Keefe.   Scotty pulls a gun, but can't bring himself to shoot his friend.  

In case you aren't familiar with Eli's and Gideon's practice, the full review contains several photos of guys doing it.

More after the break

Bertie and Jeeves: A gay gentleman in 1920s Britain and his valet/boyfriend

In the early decades of the 20th century -- at least in fiction -- there was a certain category of aristocratic but impoverished young men who lived on the largess of imperial aunts.  The funds came with the demand, and eventually the hope -- that the young men would settle down to a wife and a prosperous career, but they would have none of it.

Indeed, they spent so much time plotting ingenious escapes to the twin prisons of marriage and work that they had precious little time left over for golf, tennis, gambling, the theater, and other pleasures of indolence.

We can see the Young Man of Indolence in the 19th century Aesthete/Decadent movement; in Oscar Wilde's Importance of Being Earnest; Kenneth Graham's Rat -- "there is nothing half so much worth doing as simply messing around in boats."  And in the featherbrained Oxford boy Bertie Wooster and his longsuffering valet Jeeves.

 P.G  Wodehouse (1881-1975) first chronicled the pair in Jeeves Takes Charge (1916), and within a few years was named the most prolific  (and funniest) writer in Britain.  He went on to write 11 novels and 35 short stories about Bertie and Jeeves.

Bertie spends most stories evading marriage and gainful employment, saving his friends from jams, and getting into a few jams of his own.  While not averse to feminine charms, he definitely occupies a homosocial world: his life is informed by his friends from college or the Drone's Club, with names like Barmy, Biffy, Gussie, Stinker, Sippy, and Beefy.  And his gentleman's gentleman, Jeeves.

A professional valet, Jeeves popped into Bertie's life unannounced, like witty servants from Mary Poppins to Charles in Charge, and quickly made himself indispensable.  His maiden aunts never encouraged him to marry, nor did he ever fall prey to feminine charms.  Everyone understood that Bertie was the love of his life.

And they were together forever.  The last Jeeves and Wooster novel, Aunts Aren't Gentlemen, published in 1974, involved Jeeves helping Bertie evade a woman's clutches yet again.

The gay subtext is so obvious that one wonders if it was intentional.  Wodehouse was married to a woman, but according to some biographers asexual, repelled by the thought of sharing his bed with anyone, and according to others gay but heavily closeted after the downfall of Oscar Wilde and the dissolution of the Yellow Book chaps.  Regardless, he worked in the theater where he had many gay friends, so he was certainly aware of same-sex desire.  And many gay couples of the early 20th century masqueraded as young libertine and valet, so even if Wodehouse didn't intend for Bertie and Jeeves to be read that way, he surely knew that they could be.

More after the break

Tom Berklund: Bodybuilder and "Modern Family" cop stars in gay tragedies and poses n*de, but what's with all the lady friends?

 

Link to the n*de photos

We've finished Modern Family, but I forgot to research a bodybuilder who appeared in Episode 10.5, "Good Grief" (2018): as the family gathers for Halloween, Jay gets the word that his ex-wife DeeDee (Shelly Long) has died.  Dressed in wacky costumes, the children and grandchildren try to process their grief in different ways. Phil and Cam drive into West Hollywood for a convoluted reason, and get stuck in the Halloween parade.  As they are honking, a cop tells them to give the horn a rest.  The parade will be over soon.  Then he swishes off in his very tight chaps.

Phil: "I don't get to this part of town often.  That's not a real cop, right?"

I was annoyed that Phil says "this part of town": West Hollywood is a separate city.  But I wanted to see more of the hot cop, Tom Berklund, and his tight chaps.

I checked his Instagram first: "Real estate developer, bodybuilder, spiritual growth."  That's not an occupation, buddy.

 Some nice muscle shots, but the mixed signals made it impossible to determine if he is gay or not.

"Had a great time with Sarah and Teddy," a lady and a dog.  You're dating a lady, got it.

"Dinner and theater night out with my famous friend" Ryan Hadad, a queer disabled playwright.  Is it a date or a friend hang?

"Ali, Joey, and me."  Ali and Joey are a woman and a baby.  So is this your wife and son?  

"Post dinner sunset stroll with the one and only Tucker Breder," an actor whose Instagram is private, but he poses with a woman on Soundcloud.  Now you're dating a straight guy?

"Charlie got the lead in Once Upon a High School."  Posing with a woman and teenage boy.  But if this is your wife and son, who's Ali and the baby?   

Heck with it.  Let's look at his biceps and body parts, and see if he's been in any gay-themed movies.

Tom was born in Middleton, Wisconsin, 15 minutes from Madison, and got his BFA from the University of Michigan.  He then moved to New York, where he won the part of Gregory Gardner in the 2006 revival of A Chorus Line.  

In his monologue, Gregory talks about getting a (censored) in class, and realizing that he was gay.  Not a bad start.

Tom has 25 acting credits, but mostly parts like Dancer, Gym Attendant, Spin Instructor, and S*xy Santa (left, on Ray Donovan).  I found a few gay roles:

More after the break