And I didn't have a lot of friends who were fans. I didn't see most episodes until reruns started appearing in the 1980s.
I only remember one moment of joy: in the 1966 episode "Naked Time," the space explorers contract a virus that makes them act irrationally. Navigator Sulu (George Takai), imagining that he is D'Artagnon of the Three Musketeers, rushes down the corridor, sword in hand, his chest hard and bronze and gleaming.
And later, cured, he returns to the room he shares with Ensign Chekhov (Walter Koenig). Chekhov, already in bed, rises on one elbow. "Are you ok?" he asks. "I was worried." "I'm ok now," Sulu says, sitting next to him. They smile.
Like the smile shared by Rich and Sean in The Secret of Boyne Castle, it became an iconic memory of my childhood. I wanted that smile more than anything.
Except the scene never happened. Chekhov wasn't even in the episode, and he and Sulu were never shown sharing a room. I invented the memory.
So, what are we left with:
1. A universe where heterosexual desire is a constant. Remember when they meet early explorer Zephram Cochrane (Glen Corbett), trapped on a planet with an alien energy cloud. It's female, and in love with him.
2. An endless supply of alien babes for Captain Kirk (William Shatner) to smash his face against: "Kiss? What is kiss?"
3. Some beefcake: Kirk got his shirt ripped off in many episodes, occasionally Kirk or another character (such as Frank Gorshin) bulged, and occasionally an alien dude, such as David Soul or Michael Forest, wear a revealing outfit.
4. No significant buddy-bonding. Some people see a spark of homoerotic desire between Kirk and Spock (Leonard Nimoy), but I don't see it.
5. No gay characters, ever. Ok, we can forgive the 1960s series, but what about The Next Generation, Voyager, or Deep Space Nine? Obviously this is a world where gay people are unknown and unwelcome. No wonder my friends and I spent our time watching something else, or listening to The Monkees.