Jack Barlow: "Real Housewives" teen, Mormon missionary, hair-care guru, gay tease. With n*de and b*ondage photos.

   

Link to the n*de and b*ndage photos

Instead of doing this profile in chronological order, I'll go in the order that I conducted the research.

Jack Barlow suddenly appeared on my Instagram "suggestions," displaying his physique on the beach -- in a pink swimsuit.  Oviously gay!

But on his Instagram page, the pink swimsuit shot is followed by a barrage of photos of Jack going to rodeos and concerts, celebrating his 21st birthday, eating French crepes, bragging about how good he smells, all with his arms around his girlfriend, his future wife, the love of his life.

Ok, ok, you're heterosexual.  The cover photo was just a tease. 

After 831 girl-hugging photos, we come to another gay tease: Jack displays his physique on the beach again, holding a gigantic phallic surfboard.  Followed by a new barrage of girl-hugging.

You're hung, but nature has "prick'd thee out for women's pleasure," I get it.

A third photo depicts a younger Jack sunbathing with his Dad, but the absence of women transforms it into a masculine space, and..

We get a gay-subtext commercial for Fresh Wolf, a Men's Grooming Line created by Jack and his brother Henry -- shampoo, body wash, pomade...pomade?  Didn't that go out in the 1940s?

 

According to their website, Fresh Wolf supports Black Lives Matter and donates a portion of every sale to "foster care and displaced youth."  About 40% of runaway and homeless youth are LGBT, but that is not mentioned on the very obviously gay-coded photos. 

The weird mix of heterosexism and gay-teasing is getting out of hand.  Who wants to see Jack tied up?  (On RG Beefcake and Boyfriends)  

It is actually a photo manipulation from DeviantArt.  Now I'm wondering why Jack is so famous that he draws fan artists.  

I find out after the break 

Looking for more information about Jack, I found several articles where his Mom Lisa tells us: when he graduated from high school, he said "fudge college," he wanted to become a Mormon missionary instead.  He sent the phallic-surfboard photo with his visa application ("I should get a visa because I'm hung")

It was rejected, but a new application with a less risque photo was accepted.

As soon as he got to Colombia, Jack came down with a mysterious disease, and had to return to the States.  He finished his missionary work in Orange County.

Left: A n*de dude from Orange County.  Or USC.  Close enough.

Jack being Mormon explains the lack of LGBT representation in his company, in spite of the gay teases.   

But the same question:  why so  many articles where Mom explains the change in his missionary work? Why do people want to know?

More research reveals that Mom Lisa was one of the featured housewives in The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City (2020-).  Her husband John (left) and children, including Jack, appeared in most episodes.

According to Queerty, they trotted out "shocking rumors" of a husband's attraction to other men!!  Twice!  Both rumors turned out to be unfounded, just attempts to get viewers to tune in for sleazy dish.  Gay people -- how sordid!  

Lisa is a different story, however.  When she was called homophobic on social media for refusing to wear drag makeup, she responded that her grandfather was gay, she has always supported the LGBTQ community, she volunteers for Equality Utah, and the Latter-day Saints are actually gay-friendly.  

Say what?

So Jack is aware that gay men exist?  The teasing is by design?  

Want to see him n*de?  Or would you rather see him tied up again?  Or both?  (on  RG Beefcake and Boyfriends)

See also: "Welcome to Plathville": Beefcake and bulges of a hard-core fundamentalist family, including the Boylicious model

"Angels in America": A tearjerker about AIDS, Mormon angels, and some 1950s guy. With d*cks to keep your spirits up

Jake Satow: Saving Christmas, a Christian horse, a nonbinary internet celebrity, and the Baywatch guy