That 90s Show, Episode 3.6: Ozzie dates, Theo does stuff, and Nate the super-sized gets dumped. WIth Theo and Noah Centineo

 Link to the n*de dudes

Note: I published this review in September 2024, but upon rereading, I couldn't understand a word, with four interconnected plot threads.  So I separated them.

That 90s Show is a nostalic spin-off of That 70s Show, set 20 years later, with the children of the original cast hanging out in that basement: Jay, the pretty one (Mace Coronel, left); Nate, the super-sized (Maxwell Acee Donovan); Ozzie, the gay one (Reyn Doi); and three or four girls, it's hard to keep track.

While the other teens merge in and out of complicated love triangles and quadrangles, Ozzie is always being stymied in his quest for the elusive boyfriend.  He has a long-distance boyfriend in Canada, who dumps him before we can meet him, and then a lost connection with Isaac (Raphael Alejandro) in Season 3.  I'm reviewing the episode where they go on their first date, "Life is a Highway."

Kitty and Red's Problem: How to keep Otis from getting with his ex-wife, and convince him to pay attention to his daughter: 

Scene 1: Grandma Kitty, Grandpa Red, and Gwen's mom  are in the kitchen, doing stuff with meat, when Gwen's Dad Otis (Cedric Yarbrough) arrives with a big announcement: he was hit by a mail truck, and settled for $20,000, so he cand take a break from his truck driving job and spend some time with "his girls."

Gwen's Mom reveals a problem: whenever Gwen's Dad bangs into town, he's so charming that Mom jumps into doing stuff with him, and then they start arguing, and Gwen is in the middle of it. Easy, Grandma Kitty says: "I'll just keep you from doing stuff with him."

Scene 2: Dad Otis is cooking in preparation for the big barbecue when his daughter Gwen and focus character Leia enter, wanting truck-driving lessons.

Scene 3: At the barbecue, Gwen's Dad Otis was allowed to cook, and now the wieners are all shriveled.  Wiener  joke, har har.

 Also, Grandma Kitty was trying to prevent Gwen's parents from doing stuff, but they did stuff anyway.  "It wasn't your fault.  Trying to stop us made it hotter."

Dad Otis also blew off the big, important truck-driving lesson, letting his daughter down, so Leia and Gwen drive off by themselves, with no lessons. 

Scene 4: The girls only got a few blocks.  Still, Otis is furious  Instead of yelling, Grandma Kitty suggests talking, seeing what's bothering her.

Scene 5: Gwen explained that she stole the truck because her Dad keeps breaking his promises and is never there for her.  They have a heart-to-heart. Awww.

Scene 6: Dad Otis finally giving Gwen her truck-driving lesson. Awww. The end.

Nate the Super-Sized's Problem: How to break up with your girlfriend when you are really big.

Scene 1: At the barbecue, Nate the Super-Sized complains that he wants to break up with his overbearing girlfriend, Betsy, because he's still in love with his Ex. He tried to break up, and she said "No."  Hey, wasn't this plot on Seinfeld around 1996?  

Gwen's Dad Otis commiserates:  "I been there -- you lay the pipe too clean, the wild ones never let you go." Ulp, he's talking about Jay the Pretty One's sister!  

Ok, how to break up with her: "Tell her that you cheated with that little hottie." Ulp, he's talking about Jay's girlfriend! 

"Ok, just make up a girl. Say you cheated with Amy."

Scene 2: Nate confesses that he cheated with a girl named Amy, but girlfriend Betsy is fine with it.  In fact, she wants all three of them to do stuff together.

Scene 3: Nate the Super-sized is calling random women named Amy to find someone willing to do stuff, so his girlfriend won't know that he lied about cheating. They all hang up.  Maybe text them a photo of your super-size? 

Jay the Pretty One suggests getting super-clingy and scaring the girlfriend away.

Scene 4: Nate the Super-sized comes clean about still being in love with his ex, Nikki -- in Nikki's earshot.  The girlfriend dumps him, but Nikki doesn't want to get back together, so he is out of luck.  Maybe Jay is available.

Nikki's Problem: How to convince your boyfriend to do stuff with you: 

Scene 1: Nikki, yet another member of the basement gang, and Ozzie meet in the diner. 

Nikki's  problem: Her boyfriend, Theo (Anthony Turpel), just wants to kiss, and she's ready to go downtown, but he's shy, and she's never had to make the first move before.  Her last boyfriend was Nate the Super-sized -- always ready for anything. 

How can Nikki subtly inform her new boyfriend that she wants to do stuff?  Ozzie suggests going to a movie, making sure there's a box of popcorn on his lap, reaching for some, and missing.  Where'd you learn that trick, boy?  Isn't this your first date?

Anthony Turpel, age 24, probably has some beefcake online.  I'll check after the break.

Scene 2: Nikki takes her boyfriend to a movie, and tries the "reaching for the popcorn and missing" trick. He's fine with doing stuff, as long as she starts.

More after the break

Ozzie's Problem: How to get your date into an R-rated movie

Scene 1: Ozzie can't go to a kid's movie on his first date, but for a R-rated, he needs adults to buy the tickets.  

He asks Sonny and Bunch, an aging hippie couple, or heterosexual life partners -- it's hard to tell. They don't display any heterosexual interest in this episode, but they're played by Jay and Silent Bob, aka Kevin Smith and Jason Mewes.  

They get all excited because they don't have any kids of their own, and will welcome the opportunity to become parents. 

Scene 2:  Ozzie and Isaac are alone at the movie -- until the guys arrive to cover their eyes if something inappropriate comes on, like blood or lady parts.  Guys, lady parts won't be a problem.  Now, let's talk men's parts..

Scene 3: Ozzie and Isaac sneak into the G-rated movie, Homeward Bound 2, which they actually preferred but were afraid to admit.

Uh-oh, Sony and Bunch are helicopter parents, and come searching for Ozzie and Isaac.  They yell: "We are looking for two young boys."  That kind of joke is surprisingly common in this show.

Scene 4: Ozzie/Isaac and Nikki/Theo at the diner for their post-movie milkshakes. 

The dates were a success: Theo wants to do more stuff with Nikki, and Isaac says this was the best date he's ever been on. 

Beefcake: None.

Heterosexism: Three heterosexual couples among the teenagers, two among the adults.

Gay Characters: Maybe the aging hippie couple.  Otis and Isaac are treated as just another couple, with no homophobia anywhere. However, they have no physical contact whatever at the movie, while a row or two over, Theo is doing a lot.  

My Grade: Better than no representation at all.  But I can't help noticing that Isaac does not appear again.

Bonus:  This review seemed a little beefcake-light, so I'm including a n*de photo of someone who may be Anthony Turpel, and a super-size dude, actually Noah Centineo.

See also: That 90s Show, Episode 2.4: We meet Ozzie's boyfriend, sort of. Plus n*de photos of 90s teen idol Brian Austin Green

The Fosters: 12 hunks and hunkoids, all grown up.  With more Noah Centineo

Pilot Bunch: Unbreakable boyfriend, zombie boyfriend, teen Jesus manager.  With n*de dudes from New Orleans and Hawaii

The Out-Laws: Adam Devine has a crush on Pierce Brosnan.  Don't you?  With Reyn Doi.