Tracker: Guy tracks missing people in scary states. Are any of them gay? Do any have beefcake pics?

  

Link to the n*de dudes

The new mystery-crime series Tracker got a boost from appearing after the Superbowl (some kind of sports broadcast), and is now the most popular tv series on Hulu.  It sends the Tracker, played by Justin Hartley, to places that I'd be afraid to drive through: Klamath Falls, Oregon?  Missoula, Montana? -- to track down missing persons.  Not paranormal missing, just regular getting kidnapped and lost in the woods stuff.

He is assisted by a lawyer, a lady who likes to see him n*ked; a computer hacker who rarely leaves his cubbyhole; and his managers, a butch-femme lesbian couple, so there's some representation, but I want to see if the missing people are gay.  I watched some of the episodes until they were established as gay or straight, and otherwise depended on episode descriptions.

1. Klamath Falls: A 14 year old kidnapped, presumably by his birth dad, but then they discover that dad has been dead for several years. 

2. Missoula: A young man, played by Donald Heng, has been pulled into a deadly cult.  He's 27 years old, an accountant,  andaccording to his parents, "shy, so he doesn't meet many people."  27 years old and unmarried?  Gay...wait, his parents say that two months ago he met a woman.  Heterosexualized in 4 minutes.

3. Springland: A young woman's free-spirited sister. Well, I'm not picky, maybe she's a lesbian...nope, she has a boyfriend named Gecko.  Heterosexualized in 8 minutes.

4. Mount Shasta: A teenager played by Hunter Dillon goes missing from a troubled teen camp that is run like a prison.  They search his dorm room.  Tracker asks "Does he have a girlfriend?"  Mom doesn't know: "I don't even know if he likes girls."  He has a girlfriend, but it's nice that she doesn't assume automatically that every boy likes girls. Heterosexualized in 8 minutes.

5. St Louis.  Finally, a place I wouldn't be afraid to visit. A convicted murderer's daughter wants him to prove her father's innocence by tracking down a key witness. Doubtful.

6. Lexington: Tracker must team up with a rival tracker -- a lady -- to track down a missing race horse.  Unlikely.  I thought this assignment would be a nonstop hunk fest, but I haven't found anything. "Peter New" is in the cast list, but guess what happens when I google "Peter  New" and "nude" 

There's also a Peter Oldring.

7. Chicago. My kinda town. Tracker has to track down a female MMA fighter.His computer hacker, played by Eric Graise, gets to leave his dark computer room and participate in the action.  Eric played a gay character in the reboot of Queer as Folk, and his character is never heterosexualized, so maybe....

More after the break

8.Camden.  New Jersey?  I thought this guy just did wilderness tracking.  A dockworker played by Anthony Konechny, left, went missing two weeks before his wedding. A wedding to a woman: she's the one who hires Tracker. Heterosexualized in 1 minute. 

9. Aurora, Illinois.  A widower wants Tracker to find his missing daughter.

10. Into the Wild.  Near the Canadian border in Montana. The owner of an aerial outfitter's missing adult son and daughter, who disappeared while flying a client somewhere.  He finds the daughter, and then the son, Jarrod Daniel, trapped at the killer's cabin, and saves him by hiding under the floorboards -- sort of a homoerotic "last minute rescue" moment, but the son doesn't appear again.  At least he is never heterosexualized.

11. Beyond the Campus Walls.  At a university in Montana, a nerd in a cowboy hat goes to  a heterosexual country-western bar and chases a woman across the room, but she has a boyfriend, who beats him up and throws him in the pool.  He goes missing.  Heterosexualized at minute 1.

12. Off the Books. Tracker must work with his estranged brother, played by Jensen Ackles,  to find Bro's former army buddy, who has been exhibiting paranoid behavior.  Brother and army buddy both have wives.  

13. The Storm.  Two amateur storm chases, a man and a woman. Heterosexualized instantly.

Season 2, Episode 1: Out of the Past.  A nuclear family mom, dad, and k*ds abandon their car in rural Arkansas.  Matt Long, left, plays the evil guy.

2. Ontological Shock.  This time Tracker goes missing, and his estranged Bro must search for him.

3. Bloodlines.  Tracker and his rival tracker from last season work together to find a high school baseball player. It hasn't aired yet, but I doubt that the athlete is gay. 

Results: 13 straight, 1 unspecified, 1 horse. Not a great record.

Bonus: Oscar Chark, who appears in one of the cast lists, I forget which.

See also: Peder Lindell: Gay skater from Montana, gay Catholic b*y, magician, zombie, and pilot.

Jexi: Dull romcom enlivened by Adam Devine's d*ck and Justin Hartley

They're combing Wyoming: Eight guys flexing from the Mountain States

Poltergeist, The Gay Connection: Gay actors, skeletons, AIDS Awareness, and "They're he-ee-ere."