Evan Jachelski: Rooster Spooner, angel, pizza boy, jock with a c*ck. Plus Andrew Santino and some Polish dudes

Link to the n*de photos

 In the season finale of Rooster, acerbic college writer-in-residence Greg  (Steve Carell) tells his students about the movie It's a Wonderful Life (1946), where Clarence the Angel convinces a down-and-out dude not to off himself.  They're confused by the line: "Every time a bell rings, an angel gets its wings."  What if you're in an arcade, with bells ringing all the time?  You'd have a surplus of angels.

The guys decide to make some wings to wear at Greg's end-of-semester party.  Spooner shows off his while shirtless.  Hot twink physique with some delt and bicep development.

Spooner has been basically a background player, a member of gay-subtext Tommy's friend group with a salacious name.  His scenes consist mostly of buddy-bonding with George or J.D.  But that unexpected shirtless shot was stunning, in a series that has been skimpy with beefcake, so I wanted to do a profile of actor Evan Jachelski.

Evan was born in September 2003, and grew up in Hanover, Pennsylvania, a rural community about an hour north of Baltimore.  He is close enough to his Polish heritage to know some slang terms: badooshk, asshole; kutas, d*ck; chuj, d*ck; palka, big d*ck.

Apparently he needs to describe his d*ck quite often (Polish guys on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends).

He attended South West High School, where he played football, and trained with the Baltimore Improv Group. 

He graduated in 2022, and moved to Los Angeles to become an actor, starting with commercials for Peloton exercise equipment (playing a buffed sufer) and Reebok shoes. 

In a 2023 episode of Dave: the mild-mannered wannabe rapper (Dave Burd) returns to Philadelphia to look up the childhood Girl of His Dreams, who stuck him in the friend zone.  He's homophobic, referring to the jock who won her as a c*cksucker, but also into guys at least according to some photos that show him doing kinky gay stuff.   

Evan played "Matt's Replacement," presumably someone who took over for Dave's roommate / manager, Matt (Andrew Santino, n*de on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends). But I couldn't find him in the episode.  Maybe he wasn't blond.

More after the break

Joe Davidson: The gladiator, surfer, soap star, and gator poacher doesn't mind if you check out his d*ck. With bonus Thomas Jane and Takaya

Link to the n*de dudes

In Spartacus: House of Ashur Episode 1.1, Gladiator Logus (Joe Davidson) insults the dwarf trio Brothers Ferox: "My d*ck stands larger threats!" They promptly eviscerate him.

During the filming, Joe hooked up with (or buddied up with) the probably gay Mikey Thompson (Musicus).  Plus a brief internet search revealed this photo from the soap Neighbours: Joe's character apparently has a boyfriend.

Plus there are no girls and a lot of guys on his social media posts.  That's enough for more extensive research to determine if Joe is gay in real life, has played gay characters, or both.  Hopefully both.  

Born around 1992 or 1993, Joe grew up on Australia's ritzy Gold Coast, around Brisbane, and began on-screen acting in some teen series:

A diver in an episode of H2O: Just Add Water (2010), about three teenager girls who turn into mermaids (with Luke Mitchell as their human ally).

A swimmer in SLIDE (2011): A Melbourne girl moves to Brisbane and finds the requisite allies, crushes, and enemies, including a gay-ish boyfriend.

A surfer boy in Mako Mermaids (2013), with those three teenage mermaids up to new antics.  A merman (Chai Hanson) is added to the cast.

Joe also meets a mermaid while grieving over his dead father in Glass Tunnel (2013).  

Plus he worked at Warner Brothers Movie World, a theme park in Queensland, playing characters like Edward Scissorhands and Fred from Scooby Doo.

After graduating from the "prestigious three-year program" at Actors Central Australia in Sydney, Joe was cast in his first major role, playing Cassius Grady in the soap opera Neighbours (2017-2018).   He appears as a muscular mystery man at a Guy Fawkes Day party on the same night that the evil Hamish Roche is murdered.  Hamish's son Tyler is the chief suspect.

Cassius goes on to save Tyler's girlfriend from a capsized boat, start dating her, rescue a kidnapped baby, get a job as a gardener, and finally admit that he was the one who murdered Hamish (gasp) because he is the evil guy's long-estranged son (double gasp). 

Um...Cassius was straight, buddy. 

Maybe there are some gay roles in his later work?

Stranded (2018): A British soldier is stranded with a lady.  They smooch in the water. 

Abandoned (2018).  What do you think?

Sons of Summer (2023):  A surfer brings his buds on a trip to the Gold Coast town where his dad was murdered, and runs afoul of murderous drug dealers.  He's got a girlfriend.

Anyone But You (2023); Ben (Glen Powell) and Bea don't like each other, but Bea's sister is marrying Ben's friend Pete's sister, and for some reason they have to pretend to be a couple at the wedding.  Joe plays the current boyfriend of Ben's ex girlfriend, who dumps him for Bea's ex-boyfriend. It's based on Shakespeare's Much Ado About Nothing, so you've got to expect some partner switching. 

Joe shows his backside to demonstrate that he's much hotter than Ben.

He shows his d*ck too (after the break).

"John from Cincinnati", Part 2: Surfing Has Nothing to Do With It

Having binge watched all 8 episodes of John in Cincinnati in 2 days, I can report the following:

1. "Three generations of surfing champions find their lives turned upside down by a mysterious visitor."  Wrong!  The surfing is completely irrelevant.  They might as well have been family of taxidermists.

2. The mysterious visitor, who they call John from Cincinnati because he never tells them his name (Austin Nichols), latches on to Butchie (Brian Van Holt), the black-sheep son of the surfing family.  I thought that they were a romantic couple because Butchie sees him and immediately wants to be part of his life forever (and they hold hands).   But it's more like a religious conversion.  After their life-changing day together, Butchie gets off drugs and reconciles with his father and son, and John moves on to redeem more people (but of course they stay friends forever).

He performs some miracles, like curing the teenage Shaun's broken neck, but mostly he hangs out with you, smiling and repeating back what you have said, tinging it with cryptic but life-changing significance:

"Get back in the game"
"What do you want?"
"See God"

 Someone suggests that "When you repeat my words, I can hear the voice of your Father." 

John: "Hear the voice of my Father."  

Get it?  Well, he said he was coming back.

Among the publicans and sinners who get transformed through John smiling at them: 

Ramon (Luis Guzman, center), who runs the fleabag motel, starts to cook

Dickstein (Willie Garson, left), the sleazy corporate lawyer, quits his job, dumps his fiance, and joins the motel gang.  Ramon and Dickstein remain a gay subtext couple.

Barry Cunningham (Matt Winston, right), the teddy-bear lugging gay guy who is tormented by the physical and sexual assault in his past, joins the motel gang.

Kai (Keala Kennelly) starts to write again

Drug dealer Steady Freddie (Dayton Callie, right) cleans up , moves into the hotel and helps with the renovation.

His sidekick Polacka (Paul Ben Victor, left) moves in with him.  Gay-subtext couple.

Dr. Smith (Garret Dillahunt), a doctor who saw grandson Shaun cured of a broken neck, joins the motel gang and starts dating Barry.  Canonical gay couple.

Beefcake: An occasional shirt off.  Most of the actors are unattractive, anyway.

Heterosexual romance; Almost none. Butchie reconciles with the estranged mother of his son, estranged Grandma and Grandpa Surfers reconcile.  Some minor kissing, no sex. Grandson Shaun is 14,but displays no interest in girls.

Gay characters/subtexts:  All over the place.

My grade: A-.

See also: John from Cincinnati: Surfing Great Gets a New Boyfriend

Gavin Munn's Cute/Cool Photos, Part 2: Splashing in puddles, diving in Tulum, eating a banana. With some n*de grown-ups

  

Link to the n*de photos

This is a collection cute/cool photos of Gavin Munn, who plays Jonathan on Raising Dion and Abraham on The Righteous Gemstones.  He was under 18 in the original post, so no beefcake or n*de photos, but I may have included some of his family and friends.

1. Nice sunset.

2.  Interesting mural at the Charleston airport.

3. Gavin's idea for a rainy day activity: sit in a giant puddle and invite passing cars to splash him.  Then he filmed the splashes.

4. In Tulum Gavin is ten feet underwater.  Hopefully he checked out some Mayan ruins, too.

5. Michael Provost.

6. Muscle bud

More after the break

The twelve scruffy hunks of "Animal Kingdom." WIth a lot of bare butts

  

Someone recommended Animal Kingdom, not to be confused with the Animal Kingdom at Disney World, the Animal Planet network, or a tv show entitled Animal Control.  This one is a drama TNT featuring the struggle for succession in a crime family led by...Smurf?  "Ok, boys, I want you to go smurf out those rival smurfs and bury their smurfs in the smurf."

Link to The 12 bare butts of "Animal Kingdom"

There are a lot of sons, grandsons, and boy toys, even a gay one.  Most are sleazy, scruffy, and tattooed, not my cup of tea.  But most get bare butt scenes, so you don't have to look at their face.

1. Scott Speedman as Baz, adopted Smurf, who wants to try new crime techniques instead of Mama Smurf's old fashioned smurfing. 

2. In flashbacks to 1992 and 1996, Baz is smurfed by Darren Mann, left

3. Shawn Hatosy as Pope, eldest Smurf, who suffers from mental illness and does a lot of risky smurf. Plus he's smurfed in prison.

4.  Kevin Csolak smurfs as Pope in the flashbacks.

5. Ben Robson as Craig, middle Smurf, who parties and does drug instead of paying attention to the smurfing. 

6. Jake Weary as Deran, youngest Smurf, the moral smurf who is trying to distance himself from the family, running a surfing shop instead of smurfing crime. He is closeted for a long time, but when he finally comes out they are fine with it. 

More butts after the break

Gavin Munn's Cute/Cool Photos, Part 3: Bodybuilders, surfers, beefcake relatives, and a boy with his monkeys

  

This photo collection is mainly for fans of Gavin Munn's work in The Righteous Gemstones and Raising Dion.  Since he's only 15, no nudity, but there are some beefcake photos that may be of interest to non-fans.

Let's start with the bodybuilders

A boy and his Dad

More of Dad

A boy and his Mom

Swimmer in Ponce. The full collection is on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends

See also: Gavin Munn's Spring Break

Gavin Munn's Cute/Cool Photos, Part 1: fishing, boating, tumbling, turning 15. Plus a radnom naked guy with no connection to Gavin's older brother

Gavin Munns Cute/Cool Photos, Part 2: splashing in puddles, diving in Tulum, surfing in Costa Rica 2

Gavin Munn takes a polar plunge, with Kelton, Tony, and some n*de dudes

Gidget and Her Boys

During the early 1960s, there was a surfing craze. The Beach Boys were singing "Surfing Sarfari" (1962) and  "Surfing U.S.A." (1963). The documentary Endless Summer (1966) followed buff young men around the world in search of the perfect wave. Frankie Avalon and Annette Funicello starred in seven surf-and-sun movies: Muscle Beach Party (1964), Beach Blanket Bingo (1965), How to Stuff a Wild Bikini (1965).


And in the fall of 1965, the 19-year old Sally Field, soon to become one of the most accomplished and successful actors in Hollywood, played Gidget, the "girl midget" who dares enter the male-only surfing world  (a role originated by Sandra Dee in 1959, and based on a novel by Frederick Kohner).

It aired on Wednesday nights after teen fave rave The Patty Duke Show, and was expected to draw a similar audience.  It was hip, in color, with a modern soundtrack and lots of exterior shots -- almost unheard of for a sitcom.  But in 1965 there was usually just one tv set per household, and the grown-ups all wanted to watch The Beverly Hillbillies or The Virginian,  so it wiped out after only 32 episodes.

Too bad.  It had a lot for gay kids to like.  Fortunately, it's available on DVD.

1. Although Gidget and her best friend Larue both have boyfriends, they seem more social necessities and objects of competition than conduits of desire.  The main emotional bond comes between the two girls.

2. And for the gay boys in the audience, there is an endless parade of beefcake.  In color.

Gidget's main boyfriend, played by Peter Duel (who would go on to Alias Smith and Jones).

Her boy pals, played by Rickie Sorenson and Michael Nader, left (nephew of gay actor George Nader)

Martin Milner of Route 66 and Adam-12 as the surfing great Kahuna.

Lots of muscular guest stars lounged in swimsuits on the beach,  included Dick Gautier, Walter Koenig (Star Trek), Daniel J. Travanti (left), and Tim Rooney (Village of the Giants).

Sally Field went on to star in The Flying Nun and become one of the most respected actresses in Hollywood, but she still has a soft spot in her heart for Gidget and her boys. 

Fabian Forte at the Beach

Born in 1943, Fabian (he didn't need a last name) was a superstar by age 16.  He was a competent singer, but in a market flooded by teen singers, it was his curly hair, heavy-lidded gaze, and buffed physique that sold his records.  He practically created the teen magazine market, with beefcake pinups boosting the sales of Teen Magazine, Teen Live, Teen Illustrated, and many others.  He even got his own magazine, Fabian: Boy of Mystery.  

After his film debut in Hound Dog Man (1959), buddy bonding with Stuart Whitman, Fabian played androgynous, gay-vague, girl-crazy teens against any number of men's men: Robert Mitchum, Bing Crosby, Stewart Granger, John Wayne.

Surrounding a fey teen idol with all that brawn created a problem: the boy simply did not seem straight, in spite of his girl-ogling, especially when he sang.  So, when Henry Koester directed Fabian, he simply gave up.  

Mr. Hobbs Takes a Vacation (1962) has Fabian on stage for about five minutes, long enough to dance with Jimmy Stewart's daughter and sing "Cream Puff."

He gets slightly more screen time in Dear Brigitte (1965), but no songs, and though he buddies around with Jimmy Stewart's next daughter, he is never identified as her boyfriend and never gets physical with her.  Instead, his part of the plot involves exploiting math prodigy Erasmus Leaf (Billy Mumy) for capitalist gain.

Ride the Wild Surf (1964) capitalizes on the star's androgyny.  College student Jody (Fabian) hits Hawaii's North Shore with his buddies Steamer (Tab Hunter) and Chase (Peter Brown), to surf amid crowds of male surfers and spectators (only a few girls). Surfing becomes intensely homoerotic spectacle: they stand, their power distilled into a sharp thrust of surfboard, and explode toward the shore, all bronze chests and thick biceps, war-whooping a triumph over the elements that has nothing to do with heterosexist civilization.

Should Jody stay in Hawaii forever, luxuriating in the male beauty, living as a beach bum, or get a girl, go back to college, and settle for the staid heterosexist future of wife, kids, job, and house?  You know how it will end -- he picks the girl. Yet there is no fade out boy-girl kiss: Jody wins a surfing contest and is enveloped by his jubilant buddies, all hugging and hollering, a solid mass of men as the camera pans out to a wide-angle shot of surf and sky.

Fabian continued to act through the 1960s and 1970s, starring in Fireball 500  and Thunder Alley with Frankie Avalon, in an adaption of Agatha Christie's Ten Little Indians, in a cautionary tale about the dangers of marijuana.  And he continued to display his physique, including nude shots in Playgirl.  

You can see the nude photos on Tales of West Hollywood.

Today he is still performing, based out of Branson, Missouri.

Beach Movies: The Beefcake

The beach movie crazy began with Beach Party (1963), and lasted through Catalina Caper (1967).  During that 4 year period, American International Pictures churned out a dozen beach movies, starring former teen idol Frankie Avalon and former Mousketeer Annette Funicello, or if they were too busy, Dwayne Hickman, Tommy Kirk, Deborah Walley, and Yvonne Craig.  Other studios churned out their own teen-idols-in-Speedos movies, starring Bobby Vinton, Fabian, James Darren, Tab Hunter, and when they ran out of teen idols, Rod Lauren, Frankie Randall, Michael Callan, James Stacy, and Edd "Kookie" Burns.

The plot of the beach movie is the same in every installment: a gang of teenagers arrives in Malibu for a summer vacation.  Frankie and Annette (or their stand-ins) argue: she insists that they plan for marriage, the next step in embracing their heterosexual destiny, but he is too happy surfing, skydiving, and drag racing.

That is, he refuses to give up his homoerotic buddy-bonding with gay-vague chums.They separate, flirt with others, complain about each other to their friends, snipe at each other at the teen hangout, and walk forlornly on the beach.

Meanwhile a greedy corporation hopes to exploit the teenagers, or else salt-peter their heterosexual passions.  Maybe some juvenile delinquents cause trouble.  The climax comes in the form of a cartoonish teenagers vs. adults or delinquents brawl or car chase.  Frankie and Annette save the day, reconcile without resolving their disagreement, and head for home.

The teens are staggeringly affluent, white, and free from parental intervention of any sort.  They have all of the freedom of adulthood and none of the responsibilities.  They are living in their own surreal world of spies and saboteurs, drag races and skydiving contests, musclemen hanging from helicopters, gorillas riding surfboards.  There are Martians, mermaids, witch doctors, dime store Indians, bumbling crooks, and a girl whose gyrating hips cause volcanoes to erupt.

Every now and then Frankie mugs at the camera and asks "Can you believe this?"

And there is endless beefcake.  There are many girls in bikinis, but the beach is crowded with swimsuit boys; bulges are displayed as prominently as cleavage.  Jody McCrea's bulge makes a regular appearance.

John Ashley is dragged along the beach, the camera zooming in to capture the curve of his thighs, the tight muscles of his legs and calves, and even his frontside.

Tommy Kirk (left) wears a purple swimsuit so revealing that one can't imagine how it passed the sensors (not this photo).

Frankie doesn't bulge, but he is constantly shirtless, bedding down among his chums or standing tall and iconic beside his surfboard, his smooth, toned body preternaturally bright.

 In Fireball 500 (1966), which doesn't have a beach scene and only counts as a beach movie because it stars Frankie and Annette, Frankie spends a long scene shirtless, being interrogated by the police in his hotel room.  He never thinks to get dressed, though the officers stare at him, and one cheekily inserts his business card under Frankie's pendant, against his bare chest, like someone might insert a card into a woman's bosom.

Too bad the Disney Channel's Teen Beach Movie (2013) doesn't fare as well.

Next: The Duds

"John from Cincinnati": Former Surfing Great Gets a New Boyfriend

"In the coastal town of Imperial Beach, California live the Yosts: three generations of surfing royalty with a family curse..until a stranger arrives."

Presumably the title, John from Cincinnati, refers to th stranger.  Sounds like rather an overstuffed plot, and the cover blurg shows only a frizzy-haired woman, but maybe there will be some hot surfers.

Opening Credits:  Establishing montage of hot surfers, a naked lady at the beach, and the town of Imperial Beach, which is right on the Mexican border.

Scene 1: Luke Perry and his Brother (Austin Nichols, left) complain about illegal immigrants acting like "it's just another day on the beach."  Mitch Yost (Bruce Greenwood) is surfing; they ask him to "get back in the game," but he refuses. Luke stays behind and apologizes.   They discuss the problem with Butchie,who "fucked up" and now has no sponsor, and his grandson "breaking his cherry" at Huntington this afternoon.

Is it possible to get lost after the first three minutes?

Meanwhile, Frizzy Haired Woman is watching her kids or grandkids surf.

Scene 2: Ramon has sold his hotel to someone who is "not nice," so Butchie can't stay there for free anymore.  The Society of Surfing Lawyers has just settled his claim for $2300, so he should be able to pay the back rent.

Society of Surfing Lawyers?

Scene 3:  Brother gets accosted by a guy in military gear, whom he owes money.

Scene 4: Butchie (Brian Van Holt, left) gets a visit from Shaunie (Greyson Fletcher), a long-haired kid who is breaking his cherry later.

Scene 5: Frizzy-Haired Woman (Cissy) tells Mitch that she sent a demo tape of Shaunie  (the grandson) to all potential sponsors, including the one who got Butchie into a drug-addled "shitbird."  They argue.

Shaunie and Kai (his mother?) come in.  They argue some more.

Cissy tells Shaunie (enough with the ie-endings!) to let Bill drive him to the competition,but don't tell him about the liability waver until they are at the registration table. This is very important!

What about the family curse?  Something supernatural -- i.e., interesting -- should be happening any moment now.

Scene 6:  Military Guy and Brother have a cryptic conversation about Mitch, Butchie, and health insurance (I'm not kidding).

Scene 7: Weird recluse Bill (Ed O'Neill, the Dad from Modern Family) agrees to take Shaunie to the competititon. But don't tell Grandpa Mitch!  This is very important!

Scene 8: Chubby Ramon (Luis Guzman) and the Surfing Lawyer (Willie Garson) are packing up stuff and flirting with each other.

Meanwhile Butchie the Drughead is threatening someone over the telephone; if they don't make him right, Ice Cream Man goes over a cliff.

Brother  (name: John: hey, he's the titular character!) arrives and gives Butchie his $2,300.  But the Ice Cream Man doesn't know him, so Butchie gets very upset.  I'm not sure, but I think Brother John tricked his way into Butchie's apartment in order to represent him or have sex with him.  Either way, he'll have to pay.

 They get very close very often. I keep waiting for them to kiss.  They don't, but this is getting interesting.

Scene 9: Frizzy-Haired Cissy and Grandpa Mitch argue,then have sex (we only see them in bed afterwards).

Scene 10: Butchie and John show up at the surf shop where Kai the Ex-Wife  works, to buy a full outfit.

Kai asks Butchie about his new boyfriend (where did you dig him up?) and tells him about Shaunie's competition (don't tell Grandpa Mitch!  This is very important!).

Butchie is furious with Kai for letting Shaunie compete.  He gropes John (I'm not kidding) and holds his hand. They decide to go beat up his Dad (Mitch).

Scene 11: Frizzy-Haired Cissy at Wal-Mart. Gary the Stock Boy flirts with her..  They argue (Jeez, does she argue with everybody?)  It's obvious that she wants some of him.  But he calls the police on her (what for?)

Scene 12: Bill (Al from Married...with Children) is driving Shaunie to the competition.  He yells at other cars: "Up your nose with a rubber hose!", which was the catchphrase of Barbarino on Welcome Back Kotter.  They get a flat tire.  Shaunie sees Frizzy-Haired Cissy going past in the police car, and says "The pigs got Grandma."

Pigs?  What is this, 1968?

Scene 13: Having just had "a lei," Ramon and Surfing Lawyer emerge from their apartment to meet the hotel's new owner, Mr. Cunningham (Matt Winston),who talk like a tough from Breaking Bad.   He's newly wealthy, and he intends to level the hotel because he had a bad experience there a a kid.

Butchie and John arrive.and discuss each other's penises.  Eventually Mitch, Bill, and Shaunie all show up.

Mr. Cunningham fires shots and addresses Mitch in Breaking Bad speak: "Dos your grotesque spawn still wield the old broom handle, Mitch?  Brain the occasional 12-year old shell collector?"   Apparently Butchie beat up Mr.Cunningham when they were both in 6th grade.

Bill disarms him.

John plays nice with Shaunie (have to win over the boyfriend's son, right?)

Scene 14: The gang goes down to the police station to bail out Frizzy-Haired Cissy.  Surfing Lawyer tells Mitch that he had a crush on him at age 12.  Bill asks him to not let the Fruit get behind the wheel of a car (I don't know who he means).

Mitch and his son Butchie the Druggie have a heart-to-heart.  During which Mitch rises 2 inches into the air!  What?

Scene 15:  Surfing Lawyer invites Mr. Cunningham to go surfing (a date?  But I thought he was dating Ramon?). 

Scene 16:  The gang goes surfing.  John admits that he's never been on a board before; he lied about his surfing skill to get into Butchie's pants. But Butchie is fine with it ("we'll be friends forever, no matter what").  After knowing each other for a day? Butchie moves fast!

The three of them (including Shaunie) go in together.  Then John turns out to be an excellent surfer. Why lie about something like that? To see if Butchie wants a surf buddy or a relationship?

Cissy comments that Butchie often dates "doofuses."

Bill is suspicious of John's intentions.  He decides to get him checked out, make sure there is nothing fishy going on, just an ordinary romantic relationship.

Beefcake:  They all surf in body suits.  Mitch takes his shirt off.

Other Interesting Scenery:  No.

Gay Characters:  Butchie-John, Ramon-Surfing Lawyer, and Mr. Cunningham are all gay, or have strong gay subtexts.  (The reviews only mention the crazy, teddy bear-lugging Mr. Cunningham).

Heterosexism:  None.  Mitch and Cissy have sex, but off camera. No other male-female romantic interaction.

Will I Continue to Watch?  Only long enough to find out whether the gay relationships are subtext or text.