Peer Gynt: Your Grandfather's Heterosexism

Rock Island had a large Scandinavian population,  and our teachers, from grade school through college, felt it their duty to introduce us to "our" heritage (mostly Swedish, but also Norwegian, Danish, Icelandic, Finnish, and even Estonian). I liked Vikings and Norse mythology, but not much else:

1. The horrible fairy tales of Hans Christian Andersen, which usually ended with a kid dying
2. The Wonderful Adventure of Nils, about a boy who visits every single one of Sweden's 25 provinces.
 3. A Doll House, about a woman in an unhappy marriage
4. The Growth of the Soil, about a married couple trying to eke out a living on sparse ground.

Wait -- I could be reading The Lord of the Rings, instead of this stuff, or parked in front of the tv watching Erik Estrada on Chips. 

5. But the worst was Peer Gynt, the 1867 Ibsen play set to music by Edvard Grieg.  I had to read it, play it, perform in it. 

Peer Gynt is an irreverent rapscallion, like Tom Jones, whose adventures mostly involve sex with women.  After having sex with the sister of his true love Solveig, plus three dairy maids and a mysterious Lady in Green, Peer ends up in the Hall of the Mountain King, a haven of trolls.

The troll king offers to scratch his eye so that he can see clearly, know things as they are, but Peer refuses and runs away.  After many  adventures as a brigand and a businessman, he returns home, elderly and bitter, and reunites with his true love Solveig on her death bed.

The troll king asks "What is the difference between troll and man?"

The answer is the same as in Pippin: men don't aspire, don't dream, and certainly don't try to see things as they are.  They stay home and marry women, meekly accepting their destiny in job, house, wife, and kids. They aren't gay.

I got a B-.

In spite of my antipathy, Peer Gynt is very popular.  There have been at least 20 film and television versions in French, German, Norwegian, Dutch, English, and Hungarian.  Versions with street people as performers, with Peer as a young boy, with Peer as a hillbilly.

A 1971 German miniseries had 7 actors playing Peer Gynt in various stages of his life.

A 1941 student film had a very young Charleton Heston (future star of Ben Hur) as Peer Gynt (top photo)

There was a 1960 cartoon called Peer Gynt's Adventures in Arabia.

The 2006 tv movie was set in modern times. Robert Stadlober played a gay character in Summer Storm, but his performance was still entirely heterosexist.

Plus many stage versions and ballets.

There's a Peer Gynt festival every year in Vinstra, Norway, featuring a performance of the play next to Lake Gala, where Grieg found his inspiration.

Red, White, and Royal Blue: Romcom with the Prince of England and the President's Son in Love

 

I watched a season of Young Royals, about the crown prince of Denmark falling in love with a working-class boy. ("You can't be gay; it would destroy the monarchy!).  In Season 2, the guys break up, and the Prince starts smooching on a girl.  Ugh!  I don't care if they get together or not, I'm out.  

Next up: Red, White and Royal Blue, another gay royal romance, on Amazon Prime.   Here's hoping they won't use the "You can't be gay.  It will destroy the monarchy!" conflict.

Scene 1: The wedding of Prince Philip, future king of England.  His younger brother Henry waves and smiles.  Alex Clairmont-Diaz (Taylor Zakhar Perez), son of the U.S. President, is one of the guests.

Later, in the limo with his bff Nora, Alex scoffs.  He was a regular guy until his mom was elected; he's not used to all the pomp.  You know you can't get elected President unless you are mega-rich and powerful to begin with.  He's used to pomp.  He'll never fit in with the royals, he complains.  But she convinces him to go to the state dinner at Buckingham Palace: "Prince Henry is hot!" "Not my type -- too entitled," Alex scoffs.

At the reception line, Prince Henry (Nicholas Galitzine) is complaining about the expense of this fancy wedding.  The cake alone cost 75,000 pounds. His escort, his sister Beatrice, points out that Alex is hot.  They've met: the Prince doesn't like him, and snubs him in the line.

Scene 2:  Nora has gone off somewhere with Princess Beatrice, leaving Alex alone, miserable.  Don't lots of people want to talk to the U.S. President's son?   

He gets sloshed, insults Prince Henry for being a snob, and accidentally smears him with cake frosting.  They tussle, and both end up under the toppled 75,000 pound cake.  Chekhov's Gun: I knew that would happen.

Scene 3:  The President yells at Alex for causing yet another incident.  This one will jeopardize U.S.-Britain relations.  Haven't we been allies since like World War I?   She notes that before the incident ruined things, she was out-polling the Spice Girls.  What year is this?   Whatever the year, the Prime Minister is a black woman, and the President is a white woman with a Hispanic son.  We got us some diversity.  

Damage control: he has to fly back to London for a joint summit that explains that he and Prince Henry weren't actually fighting (well, they weren't).  They are, in fact, close friends (that will be difficult to pull off).   And no hookups while you're there.  Ok, so Alex and presumably the Prince are out to everybody.  It's not a problem in this homophobia-free world.

Scene 4:  Alex on Air Force One, drinking Diet Coke, being interrogated by his bodyguard on the royal family.  He's got to know all the details if he and Prince Henry are close friends, right? Not really -- I've never met the parents of any of my friends, and usually not boyfriends, either.  

Scene 5:  After the usual establishing shots of London, Alex arrives at Kensington Palace, the residence of the Prince of Wales (and I guess his brother).  He meets the Prince's snively personal assistant Shaan (Akshaye Khanna).  The Prince comes zooming in, and they try to smile for a photography, while Alex says "My NDA is bigger than yours."  Non-disclosure agreement? 

Time for an interview.  They have to "scooch" close together, as looks of disgust...ok, they don't like each other, I get it.  They'll be falling in love, some obstacles, standard romcom stuff, except it's a gay couple in a world where no one cares.  I'm bored.  Can't they think of any other conflict except rich/entitled and regular guy?

Spoiler alert:  Alex can be gay, but the Prince has to be closeted.  "If you are gay, it will destroy the monarchy!" I guess they thought of another conflict after all.   But at least they stay together.

My Grade: I can't grade a movie when I've only seen the first 15 minutes, but audiences like it: 94% on Rotten Tomatoes.  So if you like romcoms, go for it. I'm going to look for n*de photos of Akshaye Khanna.

See also: Isaac models at Paris Fashion Week, with some boyfriends, Lucas from "Stranger Things," and Taylor in underwear

Jason Schwartzman: Lots of quirky guys winning The Girl of Their Dreams, two gay/bi characters, one penis

 

Jason Schwartzman broke into film with Rushmore, 1998, which I didn't see: the plot synopsis sounded decidedly creepy, not to mention obsessively heterosexist.  A 15 year old boy tries to get with one of high school teachers, but she refuses to sexually assault him, so he fixes her up with his older buddy and finds an age-appropriate girlfriend.  Shudder.

He played a few more disaffected, deviant, and dangerous teenagers, in  Freaks and Geeks, Slackers, and Spun, then moved on to some well-received independents, such as I Heart Huckabees and The Grand Budapest Hotel

Link to the NSFW version

Looking through the list on the IMDB, I realize that out of Jason's 87 movies and tv shows, I've seen four: 

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, 2010:  An adaption of the graphic novel, with Scott (Michael Cera, who I watched to see) trying to win the Girl of His Dreams by clobbering her evil exes.  One is a girl; plus Scott has a gay roommate, played by Kieran Culkin. Jason plays one of the exes, Gideon G-Man Graves.

Wet Hot American Summer, 10 Years Later, 2017, reunites the gang from the movie and add some new characters, such as Deegs, "the new Andy" (Skyler Gisondo, who I watched to see). Jason plays Greg, the head boys'  counselor at the summer camp.

In The Righteous Gemstones Season 2, Jason plays Thaniel, a sleazy journalist digging up dirt about "sexual impropriety" among clergy.  He is especially interested in taking down Eli Gemstone, the most famous televangelist and mega-church pastor in the world. Eli's children, hoping to talk him into backing off, go to his cabin, and find him shot to death!  "Who killed Thaniel?" is one of the main mysteries of the season.

Jason plays a gay guy in Asteroid City, 2023: Augie Steenbeck, a World War II photojournalist who stars in the play based on the movie we're watching, and dates the playwright, I think. It's all very confusing, and not really worth it: the two are on stage for only about 30 seconds, and vanish after a single, so-distant-that-you-can-barely-see it kiss.

More Jason after the break

Schitt's Creek: A small town (in Canada, but don't tell anyone), with some gay guys and a boatload of beefcake

In the Canadian sitcom Schitt's Creek (2015-20), video magnate Johnny Rose (SCTV alumnus Eugene Levy) loses his fortune to a shady business manager, and he and his former-actress wife Moira and adult children David and Alexis  are forced to move into a cheap hotel in the desolate small town of Schitt's Creek, where they try to adapt to such hardships as sharing a room and making their own beds.

Link to NSFW version

They butt heads with many curious, eccentric, and passive-aggressive smiling-as-they-dump-on-you residents, like Mutt (Tim Rozon), the mayor's son, who lives in a barn and collects compost.

It reminds me a bit of Gilligan's Island, with the castaways trying to survive on a desert island, their plans to escape constantly falling through at the last moment.

Schitt's Creek is so small that it has only one hotel, restaurant, and "general store," and the same six people do everything.  But still, there's a lot going on, and the Roses throw themselves into town life, getting jobs, joining clubs, running for city council, dating -- a lot of dating.  David (Dan Levy) develops a friends-with-benefits relationship with a girl, Stevie (Emily Hampshire), who appears to be the hotel's only employee, and Alexis has a steady stream of boyfriends, like Mutt and  town veterinarian Ted (Dustin Milligan, left).

That's one of the things I like about Schitt's Creek -- it's overloaded with beefcake, hot guys in tight shirts -- or out of tight shirts -- everywhere you look.

The other thing I like is the writing.  The dialogue is witty, sardonic without being bitter.  There is no us vs. them, normal v. hicks or normal v. snobs.  Everyone has foibles, but almost everyone comes across as likeable.



What I don't like is:

1. David states that he is pansexual, and he is played by Dan Levy, who is gay, yet his relationships are exclusively heterosexual until the third season, when his ex-boyfriend Sebastian (Francois Arnaud) rolls into town.  Later he and Stevie get into a three-way relationship with Jake (Steve Lund, left).  

Eventually his coworker Patrick (Noah Reid) comes out and they begin dating.  Eventually, like in the Season 6 Series Finale, they get married. I get so sick of men who are canonically bisexual but only involved with women, or in this case only involved with women until the showrunners were quite sure that outing David wouldn't cause a mass exodus of horrified homophobic viewers.

2. They go to great lengths to erase everything Canadian from the show.  No loonies, no maple leaves, no jaunts to Toronto.   

Hello, CTV: for those of us who live elsewhere, half the fun of a Canadian sitcom is that it's set in Canada. I want to see multicolored money and Tim Hortons on every corner.  Corner Gas could not take place anywhere but Saskatchewan; Trailer Park Boys could not take place anywhere but Nova Scotia.  Schitt's Creek wants you to believe that it's set in Iowa.

What's wrong with a small town in Manitoba or Ontario?  Especially with all that beefcake going on.

There are some bulges, butts, and at least one Francois dick on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends