Mar 21, 2025

The cringe c*ock of "Angels and Insects"

 

Link to the c*ocks


 I don't usually use the contemporary term "cringe" as an adjective.  It's from a later generation, so it feels weird, but it is completely appropriate to describe the famous p*enis scene in Angels and Insects (1995).

Everyone in West Hollywood saw Angels and Insects when it premiered, due to the rumor of the p*enis.  Male frontal n*udity was vanishingly rare in mainstream movies in the 1990s, and rumor had it that this guy was actually up!

After 30 years, I've forgotten everything about the movie except for the cringe p*enis and people actually being insects, so I looked up a plot synopsis.

In Victorian England, entomologist William Addison (Mark Rylance, top photo) gets a job cataloging the insect collection of baronet Sir Harold Alabaster (Jeremy Kemp).  

The name Alabaster makes me cringe.


When you search for n*de photos of Jeremy Kemp, this pops up.  I doubt that it's the same one.

Yes, I'm stalling.











William, of course, falls in love with Sir Harold's daughter Eugenia, an insect-obsessed young lady who dresses like a bug.  Actually, all of the women do, for a symbolic reason that I don't quite understand, but the movie won an Oscar for best costumes.

Eugenia and William get married and have some kids, but he is bewildered by her bedroom behavior, coldly rejecting him one moment and being voracious the next, so he starts an affair with a servant girl named Matty.

Mark Rylance has shown his d*k on screen several times, but in this movie we just see it under the sheets.


Meanwhile, William spars with Eugenia's brother Edgar (Douglas Henshall), a bigot and all-around sleazebag.

 One day William comes home unexpectedly to find Edgar in bed with Eugenia.  His sister!

He jumps up and displays his cringe p*enis.

In an interview Douglas Henshall said that standing-up was not part of the script.  He just happened to be up because he was in bed with an attractive lady, and the director decided to go with it.

This makes the p*enis even more cringe.

Eugenia explains that she has been sleeping with her brother for years.  In fact, their children are Edgar's, not William's.



William decides to leave her and go to the Amazon to catalog insects with servant girl Matty, who has an interest in entomology.

So, a movie about incest and insects.  I still don't get it, but we left the theater feeling slightly nauseous.  Sometimes a p*enis is not enough. 






"The Residence": Murder at the White House, with a gay President, suit guy d*cks, and Randall Park's backside


Link to the suit guy d*cks

I wanted to see The Residence, a new Netflix comedy about a murder at the White House, because it has a gay character: the President. The Observer review specifies: "it's rarely discussed and simply accepted as part of the narrative landscape."  Buttigieg in 2028!  

Besides, I love a guy in a suit, and the White House will be full of them.

Episode 1 is "The Fall of the House of Usher," a reference to the Poe story.  





Scene 1
: Thunder rumbles.  We pass the busts and portraits of former presidents.  An older man in a tuxedo (Giancarlo Esposito) walks down a busy hall, being greeted by passersby.  He peers down at a reception, and then a formal dinner with hundreds of people attending, including the Prime Minister of Australia.  There's a knock on the door, a woman screams, and we cut to the evening's entertainment, Kylie Minogue. The camera zooming through the hallways is making me dizzy.  Back to the screaming woman, who looks like Jane Curtin.  The older man is dead!

Giancarlo's backside and p*enis are on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends. 

Scene 2: The Capitol, a few months later.  A Congressional Hearing about the murder and the investigation that followed.  First to witness: Jasmine, the Chief Usher, in charge of overseeing the Executive Residence (the 3rd floor residence of the President and his family). 

Flashback to Jasmine sitting in the very authentic-looking Blue Room, drinking while she's supposed to be working. A waiter asked if she talked to him, and advises that she not do something she'll regret. Like murder?  "Too late, I already did."  


Suddenly Agent Rausch (a woman) appears, and brings her upstairs, where the President's best friend Harry Hollinger (Ken Marino, left) says that there's been an incident, and she has to keep everyone away from the second and third floors.  

Jasmine refuses to do it because she's only the assistant usher.  She thought she was going to be the chief usher, but it was made very clear that she wouldn't, so ask the actual Chief Usher, A. B. 

Ulp -- A.B. is the murder victim!

Scene 3: Jasmine takes the elevator down, and flashes back to meeting A.B. on the same elevator earlier that evening. She congratulates him on his upcoming retirement, but he announces that he's not retiring after all, so no Chief Usher job for her.  She bangs the doors and screams.  

Later Jasmine returns to a roomful of people, including the President's friend Hollinger, Secret Service Agent Trask, the FBI director, the head of the National Park Police, and Lawrence Dokes, chief of the Washington, DC metropolitan police. 

Scene 4: Testimony switches to Chief Dokes (Isiah Whitlock, Jr.).  He explains that the White House is his jurisdiction.  No, it's not.    

Back at the crime scene, he brings in Cordelia Cupp, the greatest detective in the world, to help out.  She's on the South Lawn, bird watching. Best Friend Hollinger insists that it was a suicide, so they don't need an investigation.


Cordelia enters, discussing Teddy Roosevelt's list of birds (a real thing), and examines the body and the room -- it was locked from the inside -- a locked room mystery!   

Next she interviews the person who found the body: the President's mother-in-law, Jane Curtin in a bathrobe, who was watching a movie on tv.  She didn't go to the dinner because she doesn't like talking to people, especially her son's husband, the President.  First indication that the President is gay at Minute 14.  She heard a thump and a door close, and investigated to find the body in the Game Room.  


Cordelia gets a tour of the various other bedrooms, gym, music room, and solarium.  The President's brother Tripp was asleep, heard the scream, and went back to bed.  Best Friend Hollinger has a room there, too, which makes Cordelia suspicious.

Hollinger explains the severity of the situation: the last administration pissed off the Australians (and the Canadians, and the Danes, and...well, everybody), and this is a state dinner designed to smooth over relations.  They need to figure out what happened and put the least disastrous spin on it in 45 minutes.

More after the break. 

Mar 20, 2025

Gavin Munn's polar plunge. Plus Tony Cavalero's cold dip, a b*ondage hookup, and some n*de dudes in the snow

Link to the n *de dudes


Previous: Gavin Munn takes a polar plunge, with Kelton, Tony, and some n*de dudes

Gavin Munn, Abraham on The Righteous Gemstones (below), is quite a daredevil, but this has to be his craziest stunt yet. 





North Carolina, January 2025. The temperature is 32 degrees Fahrenheit.  What are you doing outside in a swimsuit in the middle of winter?

You're getting awfully close to that swimming pool, buddy.  Tell me you're not going to do it.









Good grief, he's doing it!

















In a hurry, buddy?












Is that a look of joy or a look of pain?













I guess Gavin is not alone.  Britain has the traditional Boxing Day dip, where you jump into the ocean on December 26th.  

There are polar plunges across the U.S. and Europe.

Eastern Europe has the Epiphany Plunge, where you dive into the cold water to retrive a cross on January 6th.

More after the break. 

Champions: Gay kid with two dads played by Andy Favreau and Anders Holm

TV series that failed after only 10 episodes used to fade into oblivion.  Now they are picked up by streaming services, Amazon Prime, Vudu, and Netflix.  But streaming services also have self-contained 10-episode series, designed to tell a story and end.  Which is Champions?

Episode 1: We open in a run-down Brooklyn gym, where two guys, a hunk and a dork, are arguing over whether to get a dog.  A gay couple?  Nope, just heterosexual life partners -- gym owner Vince (Anders Holm, below) and his layabout brother Matthew (Andy Favreau, left). Think Alan and Charlie of Two and a Half Men.

  Suddenly a gunman bursts in, threatening to kill Vince for sleeping with his wife. Matthew convinces him that Vince has such a horible life that death would be a blessing.  This is the stuff of comedy?



Is it just me, or are the pair named wrong?  The hunk should be named Vince, and the dork Matthew. And shouldn't the one with the muscular physique be the gym owner?  Did the actors get their casting calls switched?

Also, why is it the dork who has sex with a hundred women per day, beginning in high school, where he got his girlfriend Priya (Mindy Kaling) pregnant?


Speak of the devil.  Cut to the ritzy Manhattan Academy of the Performing Arts, where 15-year old Michael (transgender actress Josie Totah, before she transitioned) is being told that there's a problem with his application (whose bright idea was it to name the two stars Michael and Matthew?).  The Dean of Admissions, who admitted him and offered to let him stay in his house, has been arrested in a "Jared from Subway type sting," so Michael (the kid) has nowhere to live.

Wait -- Michael (the kid) was being groomed by a pedophile?  This is the stuff of comedy?

The solution is clear: Michael (the kid) can live with Dad Vince (the dork) and Uncle Matthew (the hunk), who didn't know that he existed before today.

The rest of the series: Michael is the only kind of gay kid one ever sees on tv, an uber-swishy, facial product-wearing, show tune-obsessed swish.  He reminds me of Justin from Ugly Betty, except that Justin took five years to come out, and Michael's gayness is a done deal, not ever questioned.  In this world, homophobia does not exist.

But racism does: Vince has a type, preferring to date Indian women, although he's eclectic in his choice of bedroom partners. Anti-Indian and other racial prejudice is frequently evoked.

Michael proceeds to rehabilitate his two Dads. He encourages Vince to cut back on his womanizing, Matthew to study for his GED, and the duo to reconcile with their estranged mother.  He helps out at the gym, too, revising its web page and giving gym bookkeeper Dana (Ginger Gonzaga) advice on her love life. 

Not that Michael (the kid) lacks problems:  he's painfully naive about everything but musical theater, he struggles to embrace his Indian heritage and to accept the fact that he's no longer the most talented performer in his school.

More after the break
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