Aug 18, 2017
Fill Your Beefcake Quota with "Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul"
Fans are upset because the new Diary of a Wimpy Kid movie, The Long Hall (2017), doesn't star Zachary Gordon or Devon Bostick.
Come on, the guy is 19 years old and buffed. Do you really want him playing the 11-year old wimp Greg Heffley?
It's a road movie, so the usual junior high nightmares take a back seat to hotel and roadside-amusement nightmares and Greg's quest to meet Mac Digby, the creator of his favorite video game, plus an ongoing antagonist, Mr. Beardo (Chris Coppola). He gets a shower AND a hot tub scene.
No heteronormative "boy meets girl" preteen romance, only minimal homophobic anxiety-jokes -- in that regard, it's far superior to its predecessors.
Unfortunately, it eschews plot development for scatological jokes and seeing how much abuse Greg's body can take -- it takes a lot. I suggest renting the DVD and going through on fast forward.
See also: Diary of a Wimpy Kid