Shane Gray: Stunt performer, pole vaulter, boy scout, man's man, with a potential p*enis and some locker room hijinks

Link to the potential p*enis and locker room hijinks

I was running low on Righteous Gemstones cast members to profile, so I checked the stunt performers for Episode 4.1, and found Shane Gray.

He was fun to research because there are a lot of Shane Grays in the world -- an African musician, an Arkansas "husband and father," a baseball player, someone who is recently deceased and extensively mourned on Facebook,  plus the fictional Shane Gray of Camp Rock, played by Joe Jonas.

Our Shane Gray is a "Stunt Man, Stunt Rigger, Action Actor, Eagle Scout."  

He has a very brief Facebook page, some newspaper articles about his boy scouting and pole vaulting, and a Youtube Channel with some audition videos.  Here he auditions for the role of Monkey D. Luffy at the Universal Fan Fest 2025.

He attended Thousand Oaks High School, where he was a pole vaulter (on the right) and had an entry in the Westlake Village Student Art Show.  He graduated in 2022.

He works with his father,  Jason Gray, another "husband and father" who runs his own rigging company and has 200 stunt jobs listed on the IMDB. 

In-your-face heteronormativity?  That explains why I didn't profile Jason.  Plus he has no beefcake photos.  Shane does.

.

The IMDB lists five stunt jobs for Shane.

He was a stunt rigger for the music video Die for You, by The Weekend (2021).

Fire safety in an episode of American Horror Story (2022): he gets set on fire.

Utility stunts in Fade to Black (upcoming), a horror movie starring John Carroll Lynch, Thomas Barbusca, Gavin Leatherwood, and Scott Evans.

Utility stunts in The Wolf and the Lamb (upcoming), a Western starring Zach McGowan (left), Eric Nelsen, Mike Manning, and Elias Kacavas

Stunt performer in The Righteous Gemstones Episode 4.1 (2025)

N*de photos after the break

Miles Heizer: Gay and nearly-gay roles, a girlfriend and some boyfriends, plus some c*ocks, bums, and Guy's Bar

 

Link to the n*de dudes

I am certainly going to visit a bar full of  guys, even if it's spelled wrong.

Or is Guy the owner, so it's Guy's bar?

I'm going either weay, but I'm not sure if Miles Heizer wants to come along.

You probably remember Miles from Parenthood (2010-2015), the sitcom with Craig T. Nelson and his four children and eight grandchildren.  It was like Modern Family without the diversity.  Miles played grandson Drew Holt: shy, sensitive, artistic, but still girl-crazy, with several girlfriends fighting over him.

The Greenville, Kentucky native was born in 1994, and began acting in 2005, with many guest spots before Parenthood, plus Rails & Ties (2007), about a young boy who survives a catastrophic train crash, and Rudderless (2014), about a father grieving over his dead son.

He had some gay-positive roles after Parenthood.

In Love, Simon (2018), he plays Cal, whom the closeted Simon mistakenly identifies as Blue, another closeted teen who posts about his experiences online.  Cal is not Blue, but he offers an ear if Simon wants to talk, suggesting that he may be bisexual, or at least an ally.

In 13 Reasons Why (2017-20), which spends three seasons explaining why a high school girl killed herself, Miles plays Alex Standell, who kisses his boyfriend Timothy Granaderos, after they are named prom kings, and everyone in the school applauds. 

He also gives us a n*de scene.  Wait, that's a woman you're on top of.  What gives?

According to Wikipedia, he dates Jessica in Seasons 1-3, then Winston Williams (Deaken Bluman) and Charlie St. George (Tyler Barnhart) in Season 4. 

Wait -- AZ Nude Men says that Miles is kissing Timothy Granaderos (left), but the fan wiki says Charlie St. George.  Granaderos plays Montgomery de la Cruz, a series antagonist who hooks up with guys, but isn't actually gay. 

Take your pick.  

After 13 Reasons, Miles appeared in two podcast series, Undertow: Narcosis and The Sisters.

He also starred in The Ex-Husbands (2023): a Manhattan dentist (Griffin Dunne of American Werewolf in London gets dumped by his wife, so he flies out to Tulum to crash his son's bachelor party. Whoops, that son gets dumped, too. Miles plays another brother, who is gay and therefore doesn't have to worry about marriage (um...gay marriage happens?)

It gets weird after the break

Gemstones Episode 2.8: Baby BIlly sees a ghost, Judy becomes a mom, and Kelvin gets *** up. Plus n*de short guys

Link to the NSFW version

Title:  "The Prayer of a Righteous Man."  James 5:16: "The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much." Whose fervent prayer is going to avail some miracles?

This ain't the 1970s: In 1993 Memphis, Junior and his dad Glendon are watching midget wrestling featuring "heel" Chris Blanton, aka "Little Fabio." Glendon thinks that it's the wave of the future, but Junior complains that it's old-fashioned.  He wants to liquidate their gambling operation to raise money for some big wrestling promotions:"This ain't the 1970s.  Wrestling has changed. You need big money to go after big talent." Glendon nixes the idea.

Next complaint: Glendon was going to leave Junior the business when he retired, but he never retires:  "Look at me, Daddy: I'm going gray with my d*ck in my hand."   Look at him, with his jaunty hand on hip, similar to after spending the night with Eli earlier this season.  He's got some femme mannerisms going on  I'm looking at a middle-aged gay man.

Glendon wants to know how he can retire when his idiot son has terrible ideas and does everything wrong?  "You hurt my feelings," Junior exclaims, starting to cry.  The boy gets hurt feelings a lot, doesn't he?   Glendon mocks him.  But he agrees that he's been holding on too long: let's liquidate the gambling operation.

We cut to Glendon being upset while Junior loads the slot machines into a truck for Mr. Dukare (played by Dakare Chatman, who was playing a teenager in Season 1.) 

Later, Junior counts the money, annoucing that they will triple it with their new wrestling promotions.  

But Glendon has other ideas. Brandishing a gun, he orders: "Handcuff yourself to that inversion table and shut the fuck up."  He then moons Junior and leaves: "You ain't never going to see this old *ss again."  

Junior screams and cries. Glendon goes off to visit Eli and get murdered on Christmas Day, 1993. 

In the present, Martin visits the captured Cycle Ninjas in jail: a group of scruffy teenagers.  Sheriff Brenda tells him that they have fake ids, no fingerprints in the system, and they aren't talking.  Martin tries to use psychology: "We know who sent you. Now you tell us."  But it doesn't work; they just fart at him.

Cut to Baby Billy selling his health elixer in a nursing home. Afterwards the spirit of his sister Aimee-Leigh appears, and encourages him to visit his son Harmon, whom he abandoned in a shopping mall in 1993. "It's time," she tells him, and "You know I'm right."  He tells her to get lost.  Aimee-Leigh appears in the Seasons 1 and 3 finales, but doesn't interact with anyone.  I wonder if she is a hallucination here.

Eli's physical therapy:  Eli gathers the siblings, their partners, and Gideon to thank them for their role in his recovery.  Keefe is not present, but Eli tells Kelvin: "You and Queef have been such a help. I keep saying 'Go back to your house,' but you wouldn't hear it. You've stayed on, helping me get on my feet with physical therapy."  He gets Keefe's name wrong, but at least he acknowledges that Kelvin has a partner.  

Wait -- how could Kelvin administer physical therapy with his hand injury? I'm getting an image of Keefe being run ragged from caring for two invalids.  Surely there were nurses around, too. 

Of course, they had an ulterior motive for not going home: the God Squad has taken over their house.

Cut to BJ and Judy putting the very pregnant Tiffany on the bus for the 15 hour trip to her mama's house in West Virginia, where she can raise her son with no money.  At the last moment. Judy asks her to stay: she's family.

Cleansing the Temple: Later that day, Kelvin and Keefe spy on the God Squad as they dance, fight with sticks, run wild on a golf cart, and..um... pee into a watering can?   "It's time to cleanse the temple!" Kelvin exclaims.  How could the God Squad control the house for several weeks with no one noticing? There's a housekeeping crew and regular security patrols.  This must be another chronological mishap.

The guys burst into the gym, knocking over things.  "This was a house of prayer, but ye made it a den of thieves!" Kelvin exclaims. Torsten orders the men to put Keefe back in the tiger cage, but Keefe tries to fight back, Kelvin yells "No one re-cages Keefe," and they relent. 

Next he reminds them of all the good he's done. Before joining the God Squad, Torsten was "a little doughboy" who still lived with his parents. "I chiseled you into the sculpture you are today." 

When Cody had cramps, Kelvin "crawled into his yurt and massaged him until sunrise."  The guys stare at Cody, who shakes his head -- that didn't happen.  In a cult based on homoerotic desire, why would anyone disapprove of Cody and Kelvin getting busy?  There appears to be a major misunderstanding here. Maybe some of the God Squad musclemen are straight alphas, in it for the muscles, just tolerating the homoerotic activity of Kelvin, his boyfriend, and the guys he invites to the steam showers.

Torsten challenges "the Messiah of the Muscle Men" to another cross raising to determine leadership.

Whoa, there used to be twelve musclemen -- now there are 23.  The cross used to be about ten feet high.  Now it's over thirty!

As Kelvin grabs the crossbars, the casts on his hands fly off -- a miracle!  Although he is much smaller than the musclemen, he is able to get it up -- another miracle!  Keefe drops to his knees, apparently in worship.  He needs to decide whether he wants a boyfriend or a Savior.

When he has achieved leadership, Kelvin orders the God Squad to get out of his house, then pulls Keefe to his feet.  They hug and do their weird forehead press thing, but don't kiss.  I guess it's been decided for him: Kelvin is the strongest, but not the Messiah, and Keefe is an equal partner, not his disciple. 

Torsten: "It's your house, Bro.  You didn't need to get weird about it."  But of course Kelvin had to prove that he was strong, potent -- a man.

More after the break

"Ghosts," Episode 3.10: Nigel and Isaac's wedding day, with an adult performer, a vengeful Puritan, a n*de Viking, and lots of plot twists

If this one is censored, I'm going to just let it stay censored.

Link to the n*de dudes

In the British version of Ghosts (2019-23), the gay ghost is closeted, with a "disgraceful secret" that he never reveals to his housemates.  I heard that the American version (2021-25) was better at gay representation, so I watched Episode 3.10, "Isaac's Wedding"

The Premise: Sam (a woman) and Jay (Utkarsh Ambudkar) inherit a house filled with the ghosts of people who have died there or nearby, and for some reason can't move on to the afterlife.  Since she was dead for a few minutes after an accident Sam can see and hear them, but Jay can't.

Nigel (John Hartman, right), a British soldier who died during the Revolutionary War, has been in a relationship with Isaac (Brandon Scott Jones, left), the Continental soldier who he killed (by accident)).  They are going to get married today, but Isaac is worried about his ongoing fantasy about Chris, the adult performer hired for his bachelor party (the humans told him that he was performing for an empty room).  

Isaac asks Sassapis (Roman Zaragosa), a Native American who died in the 16th century, about his attraction to the adult performer.  Sassapis reassures him that it's just cold feet.

The DJ hired to play at the wedding arrives -- and to everyone's surprise, it's adult performer Chris (Deniz Akdeniz)!  He's gay, he hates the show Hamilton, and he has no sense of smell -- all points in his favor.  When he eats crab and has an allergic reaction, Isaac secretly wishes that he will die, so they can date -- but he survives.

Meanwhile Peter (Richie Moriarty), a 1980s scout leader who accidentally shot an arrow through his neck, has discovered that he can leave the house by poltergeisting family members, so he follows his descendants to a Caribbean vacation, and meets a female ghost from his time period.  They have a passionate affair, but then he starts to evaporate.  

Back at the house, the wedding begins, with Sassapis officiating.  As Nigel and Issac exchange vows, Peter returns from the Caribbean, finds that he is whole again, and interrupts with his shout of jubiliation.  He tells the story of his trip and the intensity of his love, and Isaac realizes that there's something missing in his relationship with Nigel.  He backs out at the last minute.  

Not noticing, lounge singer Alberta, who was poisoned during the Prohibition Era, starts singing "At Last" anyway.  Nigel runs off crying.

Later, Isaac's housemates agree with his decision.  He's 300 years old, and he's been out for only a few years, so he shouldn't rush into a relationship right away.  He needs time to grow.

More after the break

"White Lotus": Checking Season 3 for gay characters, homophobia, Thai guys, and Patrick Schwarzenegger's d*ck

Believe it or not, I'm actually thinking of giving The White Lotus Season 3 a shot.  It takes place in Thailand.  I've visited: beautiful temples and monasteries, the Grand Palace.  I took a class in Theravada Buddhism at the Institute of Buddhist Studies. I'm into Asian guys.

Sure, it's produced by major homophobe Mike White, and the earlier seasons had some of the most offensive gay predator stereotypes, but...it's Thailand.  

But before investing, let's see how homophobic it is with the "Season 3" anad the "Coming Up in Season 3" trailers.   

Trailer:

1. An Anglo husband, wife, and three young adult children, and a middle aged woman come ashore, followed by a plus-sized African-American woman, while the voiceover tells us, "At the end of the week, you'll be a different person." 

I think they are Timothy Ratliff (Jason Isaacs, left), wife, daughter, and sons; and Belinda. 

2. Montage of female Thai dancers, Rick (Walton Goggins) kissing his girlfriend, and Three Women crying, screaming, and jumping out of a window.  The voiceover:  "What happens in Thailand, stays in Thailand."

3. Establishing shots of the resort, with the manager, maybe Fabian (Christian Feidrel),  saying "Our hotel is the best in the world."  

Montage of the Three Women hugging in the pool, Rick kissing his girlfriend, someone entering the ocean fully clothed, a ceramic monkey, gunshots, and drowning.  So we'll have some murders.

4. The Three Women toast each other. "To Thailand, and a week of memories."  Some couples on a boat. 

Then back to the Ratliff family from Scene 1.  Mom is happy that her children are all together, but they are miserable. 

5. Belinda from Scene 1 getting and giving massages, so she can bring her skills back to Maui.  I guess she's going to become a masseuse.

6. Rick and his girlfriend going to dinner.  She tells him that this is a wellness resort, so he should get a facial, because everyone thinks that he's her father.  She will help him find his joy again.

7. The Three Women hugging and laughing. One lies down in a bikini. 

8. Tax Evader Timothy Ratliff gets a phone call. He won't tell his family what it's about, because "We're poor now and Daddy's going to prison."

9. A masked robber invades a jewelry store.  Maybe he's Timothy, trying to make some money?  A cop, maybe Gaitok (Tayme Thapthimthong) runs out to apprehend him,  and gets clobbered.  A new security guard is told, "Your job is to protect the hotel."

10. Cop Gaitok says "I don't want to hurt anyone," and fires his gun, while his girlfriend tells him "You've got to be stronger than this."

11. Tax Evader Timothy Ratliff asks his wife, "What if we lost everything?"  She would "not want to live." Uh-oh, she's going to be murdered.

12. The Three Women laughing and hugging some more.  One cries.

13. One of the Ratliff sons, I think Lochlan (Sam Nivola), asks his brother Saxon (Patrick Schwarzenegger, left),  "What if this life is just a test, to see if we can be better people?" over a montage of a shirtless guy approaching Massseuse Belinda, Rick holding a snake, and Cop Gaitok and his girlfriend watching a show and laughing. 

Saxon finds the "Life is a test" theory ridiculous.

14. A shirtless Saxon twirls a woman, Timothy pulls out a gun, fireworks, a woman in a bikini, Rick kissing his girlfriend, partying, Buddha, partying, a woman's legs, a corpse, screaming.

15. A man tells Belinda the Masseuse, "Go big or go home."

The only male character not shown with a girlfriend is Lochlan Ratliff.  Let's try the "Upcoming Trailer:" After the break

Matthew Jeffers: Elizabethan earl, comedic foil, gay dwarf who fights aliens. With short guy bonus

Link to the n*de dudes

 I don't like the latest (and final?) Walking Dead series, The Ones Who Live: Rick and Michonne, the "heroes" of the zombie Apocalypse even though they make really stupid decisions, are still alive!  Gay characters lose their partners after an episode, or don't even mention being gay except in an off hand comment, but heterosexual romance gets infinite space. 

.Michonne hasn't heard from Rick for years, but she knows he is still alive, and is so desperate to find him that she leaves her two kids behind to search the zombie-infested wilderness.  And she keeps running into people who put their own lives on hold, abandon their family and friends, and leap into deadly danger to assist her in her search. "Heterosexual romance is Everything!  Of course I'll help you!"

But I liked Nat (Matthew Jeffers), the loose-cannon chemistry expert who...drops everything to help Michonne find Rick, becomes her swishy gay-coded best buddy, and dies on the way (it's a sacrifice for heterosexual romance, which is Everything, so he dies happy).  He doesn't display any heterosexual interest of his own, and he's got a cool "screamstick" that can take out helicopters.  In the video game, it's a level 34 weapon that causes 7284 points of damage and can "destroy heaven and Earth."

I'm into short guys, as you know from my profiles of Ryan Pinkston, Daryl Sabara,  and Frederick Koehler -- so really short guys are something of a fantasy.  The shortest I've ever hooked up with was about  4'10."  

Enough about the 4 feet.  Let's talk about the 10 inches.

Matthew Jeffers is 4'2"

Born in Baltimore in 1991, Matt graduated from Towson University with a degree in theater arts. He has 9 acting roles listed on the IMDB, notably 34 episodes as nurse Mark Walsh on the medical drama New Amsterdam (2018-22).

More after the break

Matt Smith: Who doesn't want to see the d*cks of Christopher Isherwood, Charles Manson, Superworm, and Dr. Who?

Link to the n*de photos

We've been watching the 2011 series of Doctor Who, the seemingly endless British sci-fi series that sends the last remaining Time Lord through time and space to save Earth, an alien planet, or the entire universe.  Again and again.  Oddly, when his world-saving takes him to modern day Britain, there are plenty of exteriors, but when it is a distant planet or the far future, all we see are endless corridors. 

Doctors regenerate every few years, getting new bodies and personalities.  Right now it's Matt Smith, an effervescent, jokey type, with an inner trauma that sometimes comes out.  After all, he saw the destruction of his people, and he's over 1,000 years old, so dozens of human companions have died, gotten lost, or left him to go on with their lives.

Matt Smith has appeared as the Doctor in dozens of projects outside the show itself: videos exploring odd corners of his universe, video games, a lot of four-episode miniseries, spin-offs starring former companions Sarah Jane and Amy Pond

The children's program Blue Peter. 

Comic Relief: Red Nose Day, An Adventure in Time and Space...I got tired of counting.  You have to be British to really understand his amazing popularity.

The Doctor would be enough for a career, but Matt has played a wide range of other characters, mostly based on real people:

Christopher Isherwood, the gay author of A Passage to India and Maurice, in Christopher and His Kind, a 2011 adaption of his memoirs. Left, the one without the biceps.

Rowing star Bert Bushnell in Bert & Dickie, 2012.  Neither was gay.

More after the break

Superman: You'll Believe a Man Can Fly

Superman first flew in 1938, and for the next 40 years he had comic books, movie serials, cartoons, and radio and tv series, but no feature films.  Nor, for that matter, did any superhero except for the tongue-in-cheek Batman (1966).

That all changed in December 1978.

 It was a dreary winter, dark, cold, and snowy, with movies about angst, tragedy, and lost love: The Deer Hunter, Same Time Next Year, California Suite, Moment by Moment, Oliver's Story.  I was depressed; a semester into college, and I hadn't met any gay people, or learned of any gay writers except Shakespeare and Oscar Wilde.  Superman was a bright spot, a cozy childhood memory (though it too had a cave of ice).

Director Richard Donner was careful to include every familiar aspect of the Superman myth: the doomed planet Krypton, the elderly farm couple of Smallville, the Daily Planet, Perry White, Lois Lane, Jimmy Olsen, the Fortress of Solitude, Lex Luthor. And some from the familiar TV Superman of the 1950s, who used to change clothes in a phone booth (no old-style phone booths left in 1978).

Indeed, everyone was so busy checking off their list of Superman conventions that they forgot to pay attention to the plot: Lex Luthor plans to drop a nuclear bomb on the San Andreas Fault, thus causing California to slip into the ocean, whereup he will get rich by selling prime oceanside real estate in Nevada.

Ok, that was ridiculous even for a comic book.

The Man of Steel was played by 26-year old Christopher Reeve, a virtual unknown (he had one movie credit and a few tv appearances). He was hired for his muscles, his square jaw, and for his uncanny ability to be both sexy and wholesome at the same time.

He didn't disrobe during the movie, but he favored us with some beefcake shots in teen magazines and in the faux-gay After Dark.

 He was interviewed in gay magazines, an almost unprecedent act of solidarity in the 1970s, and in 1982 he played a gay character, the protege of playwright Sidney Bruhl (Michael Cane) in Death Trap.  I can still remember the gasps of shock when the two characters kissed on-camera.

Gay-positive Christopher Reeve and his studly physique provided the only gay interest in Superman.  No buddy-bonding in high school, no boy pal, no subdued homoromantic sniping with Lex Luthor.

It was a heterosexual love story, and rather a sappy one.  Audiences twittered and squirmed when Superman and Lois Lane (Margot Kidder) flew endlessly through the skies of Metropolis hand in hand, while Lois thought: "Can you feel what I feel? Do you know what you're doing to me?"

On the other hand, she wasn't a complete Girl Scout.  She asked, "How big are you...um, I mean, how tall?", leading to considerable speculation about the Man of Steel's package.

Christopher Reeve was paralyzed in an equestrian accident in 1995, and died in 2004.  Margot Kidder died in 2018.  They're both gone, but that magical night in the midst of a cold, dark, dreary winter lives on.

See also: Jeff East: Tom Sawyer's boyfriend, young Superman, n*de fratboy, Pumpkin prey

Skyler Gisondo's Hot/Hung Photos, Part 2.  Skyler plays Jimmy Olson in the 2025 Superman movie.

"Young Rock" Episode 2.8: The Rock hits the big time, with lots of locker room banter with wrestling greats in skimp suits

 

Young Rock is a fictional autobiographical series about the childhood of Dwayne Johnson, the Rock, bookended by his presidential bid in 2033 (the U.S. could do worse: Dwayne is a gay ally),   I reviewed Episode 2.8, which features Miles Burris as Hunter Hearst Hemsley, a flamboyant blond wrestler.  I figured that he was a parody of Gorgeous George (1915-1963), who riled up the audience by pretending to be gay, so there might be some gay subtexts or homophobia. 

Link to NSFW version

Scene 1: Johnson Family Ranch, 2033, three days before the election. Dwayne's bromantic partner, Randall Park, and his staff are waiting in the kitchen.  The doctor comes out of his room and says "I don't think he's going to make it...to his campaign event tonight!" (Har-har).  He's got food poisoning from bad clam chowder.  "And he's asking for his boyf...best buddy."

Scene 2: Dwayne tells his boyf...best buddy that he's going to the event anyway.  When you face a challenge, you meet it head-on, like he did in 1996 when he got a call... the WWF is taping in Corpus Christi, and they want him for a "dark match" (before the main match, to get the crowd revved up). His first professional wrestling gig!  He just needs to quit his job at the gym and borrow some wrestling gear. 

Scene 3: Dwayne (Uli Latukefu) arrives in Corpus Christi, and is picked up by his opponent, Steve Lombardi (Scott Colton), The Brooklyn Brawler, a 32-year veteran who broke his dad into wrestling years ago. So this guy is over 50 and still wrestling?  The arena is sold out -- 15,000 fans.

Scene 4: Back in 2033, bromantic partner Randall asks if Dwayne was scared.  "No -- I was where I wanted to be."  

Next Dwayne meets the man in charge of his match, ex-wrestler Michael P.S.Hayes (Brad Burroughs).  The PS stands for "Purely Sexy." His advice: "Follow the Brawler's lead, and keep it simple.  You got six minutes. "But how do you want me to go over (lose the match)?"  Hayes and Brawler both laugh: "Kid, we flew you here to win."

Dwayne is shocked. Winning is unheard-of for your first match! He wants to call his parents, but there's no time. Anyway, they're getting the scoop on a WWF chatroom on America Online (if you remember AOL, you're getting brochures from the AARP).

Scene 5: Locker room.  While dressing (or undressing), Dwayne is greeted by The Iron Sheik (Brett Azar left), a retired "heel" (bad guy) who has moved into heel management.  He promises to call Dwayne's parents. during the match to give them updates. Gee, these wrestlers are a big happy family.   

Dwayne also meets Stone Cold Steve Austin (Luke Hawx, bottom photo) who will one day revolutionalize wrestling, but now is stuck in a non-speaking persona; Downtown Bruno (Ryan Pinkston), The Undertaker, Mantaur, and Mankind (Brock Dunstan), his future tag-team partner.  Mankind thinks that winning his first match is a bad idea, since if he wins and the crowd doesn't like him, he'll be finished as a wrestler. 

Finally, a long-haired blond in a fancy suit, carrying a cane (he "looked like he was late for a fox hunt"), introduces himself as Hunter Hearst Hemsley, or Triple-H ( Miles Burris).  He will become world champion 14 times, one of the Rock's most important heels, and off-stage, one of his closest friends. They spar with each other, but without using any feminine-slurs.  Ok, so not a parody of Gorgeous George after all, a real wrestler.  He built his persona as rich-snob rather than feminine-gay.  

Scene 6: Showtime!  Everyone gives Dwayne encouragement: "It doesn't matter if you wrestle for ten years or ten minutes.  You make this moment happen!"  He walks out, waves to the crowd, ignores the heckler who asks "Who the hell are you?" The Brooklyn Brawler comes out, threatens the crowd, and gets booed.  "Six minutes to change the course of my life," Dwayne thinks.  Of course he's going to win, but he has to do it in a way that excites the fans. 

They wrestle; Dwayne actually throws the Brawler into a somersault!  I thought it was impressive, but the crowd jeers.  Back stage, Triple-H laughs.  Hey, are you still playing a character, or are you actually a bully?  The Iron Sheik suggests Dwayne show his legs, get some sexiness going on.  

When the Brawler starts pulverizing Dwayne, the crowd is silent. Uh-oh, they're supposed to sympathize. "What do we do now?" Dwayne asks, panicking.  "Just sell it for awhile.  If the crowd cares about you, they'll respond." 

So Dwayne plays at being in pain, and the love of the underdog kicks in.  The crowd starts encourage him to fight.  As if strengthened by their encouragement, Dwayne bounces back and uses amazing acrobatic moves to finish off  the Brawler.  Everyone backstage is ecstatic.  The kid has showmanship!

Scene 7: Back in 2033, Randall wants to talk about his first stage experience: in college he starred in an all-Asian version of The Hudsucker Proxy.  This puts Dwayne to sleep, so Randall says "Sweet dreams, Big Prince," and leans over to kiss him.  Dwayne wakes up, and he backs off. I take it you're hoping to move the bromance into boyfriend territory?  The end.

Beefcake: Lots.  Half the episode takes place in the locker room, with those muscle studs walking around in those skimpy little wrestling tights.

Heterosexism: None. Young Dwayne has a brief telephone conversation with someone who may be his girlfriend.  Only one insult about someone's lack of sexual practice.  No homophobic slurs.

Gay Characters: None that I know of.  There are wikipedia pages for 48 "openly" gay professional wrestlers, but none of the guys in this episodes.

Gay Subtexts: Deliberate, with Randall Park being in love with Dwayne.

The Inside Scoop: The inside look at pro wrestling was interesting, and the pop-ups useful in figuring out who these guys were. Dwayne is a little too quick to tell us the moral of the story, but after all he is supposed to be sharing his wisdom.   

My Grade: A-

There are a lot of wrestler butts and one penis on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends.

Giovanni Ribisi: Cute on "Friends," then dreary, depressing, homophobic art-house movies. At least he shows his d*ck

 

 Link to the Giovanni d*ck

I first saw Giovanni Ribisi on Friends, where he had a recurring role as Phoebe's cute, naive younger brother Frank (1995-2003).  

His plotlines were extensively heterosexist -- it was Friends, after all.   Eventually he falls in love with a much older woman (Debra Jo Rupp of That 70s Show), and asks Phoebe to be the surrogate mother for his child.

But at least he had nice biceps.

The 21-year old actor, son of a talent agent and a musician, had been on screen since he was 9 years old, with recurring roles in The New Leave It to Beaver, Davis Rules, My Two Dads, The Wonder Years, and Family Album, and guest shots practically everywhere.

Here Teddy and Boz (Giovanni, Stephen Dorff) rib their "dateless amigo" Bud Bundy on a 1989 episode of Married With Children. 

As a young adult, Giovanni had a lean, rugged frame and a handsome but quirky  face.  I got such a strong gay vibe that I expected a lot of gay characters or subtexts in his work.  Instead, he played a lot of brooding, depressed heterosexuals in art-house movies: 

SubUrbia (1996): a group of teens in small-town Austin, Texas (of all places) experience angst and want to escape.   Nice physique, buddy

Lost Highway (1997):  A neo-noir by David Lynch, so of course it makes no sense.  No men show their stuff, as one expects from Mr. Lynch, but there are lots of lady parts.

First Love, Last Rites (1997): Two Generation X-ers, Giovanni and a girl, do bedroom stuff and are bored.  

More after the break

Gemstones Episode 2.7: Holding hands among the yurts, and eating pizza for desserts. With a n*de Jonathan Bennett bonus

 This is the G-rated version of the Episode 2.7 review,

Go to the n*de version

In the last episode, Kelvin and Keefe were ejected from the God Squad and kicked out of their house, and Eli was shot several times and crashed his car. Gulp, he's dead!

When you get tired of discussing you know what: Whew, Eli's not dead after all, but he's in a coma. Jesse/Amber and Judy/BJ hug and cry at his bedside.  Kelvin is noticeably absent.  Then the siblings go out into the parking lot and throw up multiple times. followed by the partners.   Is this a common response to grief, or did they all have bad sushi for dinner?

Ok, we're not tired of discussing you kow yet:  We cut to Keefe trapped in the God Squad's tiger cage.  There are several openings to look through, but he prefers the glory h*le, as if awaiting his next customer.  This time, Sky pushes through, hitting him in the eye!  

Sky didn't really want you-know-what, he wanted to tease Keefe, demonstrating what he couldn't have.  The God Squad guys laugh and high-five each other.  In gay communities, and actually among heterosexuals also, the person who performs is often denigrated, considered physically and socially inferior. Keefe's activity with Kelvin apparently brands him as "a bottom." 

Keefe collapses, screaming in pain, and starts to cry.  He has died and gone to hell, being punished for Kelvin's sins -- a veritable Christ figure.  Note that Keefe undergoes a symbolic death and resurrection in every season.

When the God Squad guys leave, Kelvin appears with food and toiletries.  Interestingly, Keefe calls him by the formal "Brother Kelvin."  He isn't sure that he wants a romantic relationship with this guy who lets him suffer in a tiger cage instead of saying "Game's over! Let Keefe out!" and calling security if the God Squad resists.  But Christ-Keefe doesn't even suggest release; instead, he advises Kelvin that he's as powerful as Eli, just as Jesus was as powerful as his Father.  

Beauty and the Beast:  In church, Jesse announces that Eli was gunned down while driving on Long Point Road. Trivia note: This is a real road in a suburb of Charleston.  It leads past the Seacoast Church, a megachurch that closely resembles the Salvation Center. 

Afterwards, the family is at their post-church dinner at Jason's Steakhouse, when Kelvin arrives, wearing a dark purple robe, carefully holding his glass of orange drink. 

They yell at him for not being around late;y, but he isn't ready to show himself in public yet. "I am a beast!"  Jesse quips that the robe makes him look like the beauty from Beauty and the Beast.

Next they argue over who will fill the power vacuum left by Eli's absence, until Martin has had enough: "Can't you just be kind to each other? Self-absorbed, loud, arrogant fucking a*holes."  That's about the size of it.

Kelvin agrees:"Y'all are a bunch of a-holes."  Jesse points out that he was talking about "you, too, d*ck-lips."  The term refers to lips that would be especially nice to have s*x with: a call-back to the scene earlier, and yet another reference to Kelvin being gay.  

The Return of Baby Billy: After scenes where Judy promises to become a better person and Gideon announces that he's leaving to take a stunt job, BJ and Tiffany track Baby Billy's movements from his credit card statement.  He's in Winston-Salem, spending money at Sbarro, Bojangles, Tommy Hilfinger, Aeropostale, and the Fossil Watch Store.  Trivia alert: the dates were all in mid October, 2022. This episode aired on February 13, 2022.  

Tiffany can sound out most of the words; apparently BJ has been teaching her to read.  He has become a father figure. 

In Winston-Salem, Baby Billy is recording a commercial for his new scam, a coconut-flavored health elixir that will cure every disease, even COVID.  Dude, that's false advertising, a criminal offense. On his way out of the studio, BJ, Judy, and Tiffany accost him.  First he tries to hide; then he claims that he was trying to make money to support Tiffany and their son; then he assaults BJ and runs away. 

Jesse's Plan:  After discussing the possibility of blowing up Junior's house and having a heart-to-heart with Martin, Jesse reveals to the siblings his new plan: he'll tell the congregation and the news media that Eli is recovering, and give them his hospital and room number, so the listening Cycle Ninjas will know to where to strike again.  Except Eli won't be there: Jesse will clear the hospital and lay in wait, ready to gun them down. Can you really clear an entire hospital? The siblings think that it's a crazy idea, but he talks them into it: "Let's lie to the church like a fucking family." 

Cut to the ambulances and army jeeps moving Eli to the safe house. Which happens to be his own mansion; is that wise?  Judy, Amber, and the kids join him.

More after the break

Skyler Gisondo's Hot/H*ng Photos, Part 5: A bathtub, a glory h*le, b*ndage with Scotty, bonus Corenswet and Hoult

   

 Link to the n***de photos

This is a collection of hot or humorous photos of  Skyler Gisondo, star of The Santa Clarita Diet and The Righteous Gemstones, and Jimmy Olson in the upcoming Superman: Legacy.  

1. "Another photo collection?  Haven't you seen enough of me?"

I can't help it, buddy.  You keep posting interesting pics.

2. And now that you're starring in Superman, we have interesting photos of David Corenswet to worry about, too.

3. And Nicholas Hoult

4. "Hey, I thought this was a photo collection about me."

Sorry.  How about a long-hair bathtub pic? 

5. So, what do you want to do now?

"Just stay there for a second, okay?  I'm almost done."

Sure, buddy.  Take all the time you need. 

6. "Have you met my girlfriend?"

Odd time to introduce her.

More after the break

"Everybody Loves Greg": Vincent Martella grows up, plays Phineas, dates some guys. With some d*cks and Skyler Gisondo

 Link to the n*de dudes

We've been watching Everybody Hates Chris (2005-2009) on Hulu: a nostalgia sitcom featuring the  childhood adventures of comedian Chris Rock, who provided the commentary.  Young Chris (Tyler James Williams) attended an all-white middle school, where everyone hated him, except his teacher, who pitied him for..stereotype of the week.  

He had a bully with an endless supply of racist terms (Travis Flory), a white best friend (Vincent Martella), and at home, Dad with about 35 jobs (Terry Crews), way overbearing Mom (Tichina Arnold), bratty little sister (Imani Hakim), and a little brother (Tequan Richmond), who was bigger, and far more attractive: everybody was in love with him, which was usually fine,but a problem around Valentine's Day, when the truckloads of cards, candy, and wedding proposals arrived. 

It was quite homophobic, even for the 2000s.  Chris Rock's commentary displayed revulsion and disgust whenever he could: "Hey, this ain't Brokeback!"  One episode featured Chris befriending a gay student, but they called him "androgynous."

Nearly 20 years later, the cast varies on their level of homophobia, from Terry Crewes and Tyler James Williams (ugh!).

To Tequan Richmond and Imani Hakim (allies)

 To Vincent Martella, seen here at a Clippers game with Mikey Reid.

After Chris, he became the voice of Phineas in the animated Phineas and Ferb, which is endless: 140 episodes from 2007-2025, plus thousands of movies: Christmas Vacation, Across the Second Dimension, Mission Marvel....

Vincent has also done other animation work, like the video game Final Fantasy XIII, Batman: Death in the Family, and Disney Infinity

Left: Vincent and Mikey have fun during the COVID quarantine.

Vincent's live-action work includes Patrick in three episodes of The Walking Dead: he is a member of a zombie holocaust survivor community in an abandoned prison. Then he get sick, dies, zombifies, and creates a new zombie infestation.

I have a question about this Cupid costume.  

More after the break.