NySocBoy's Beefcake and Buddy-Bonding: Off Campus: Hannah must choose between a hocky star with a backside and a bad boy with tats. Plus a gay bestie and fratboy c*cks

May 26, 2026

Off Campus: Hannah must choose between a hocky star with a backside and a bad boy with tats. Plus a gay bestie and fratboy c*cks

**Link to the n*de photos**

Apparently the success of Heated Rivalry has started a trend. Producers thought, "Ok, viewers want to see more hockey players," not "viewers want to see more gay romance," so we're getting a lot of hockey player hetero romance. I'm watching Off Campus (2026), on Amazon Prime, in spite of the annoying commercial breaks, in case there's a gay character -- or some dicks.

Scene 1:Hockey Star Garrett (Belmont Cameli, left) puts on his uniform, listens to "Dancing By Myself," and practices, while Hannah does janitorial work, listening to the same song.

Finished, he takes off his shirt -- the tattoo says Nullum Gratuitum Prandium, "There ain't no such thing as a free lunch," which presumably will become important later. He langorously showers. Hannah, wearing headphones, can't hear the shower, and accidentally sees his backside -- and his front, when he turns around. She hurriedly exits, grinnng.

Belmont states in an interview, "Obviously I'm being sexualized to some extent, but I never felt exploited."

Scene 2: 90% of viewers tune in to see Cameli's backside (and hopefully front), so they got it out of the way. Now we can get on to the plot. At a hoity-toity university, the philosophy professor explains to the class that C means C, so 70% of the students got C+ or lower on their papers. Hannah's gay bff Dexter (Miles Gutierrez-Riley, the boyfriend on Agatha All Along) complains that it's a jock class, so why should he bother? Philosophy is a jock class?

Jock Beau (Khobe Maxwell, who played a gay guy in Cruel Intentions), looks at his grade and wonders if he can still drop the class. His bro, Garrett from Scene 1, points out that they need it for their major, but not to worry, the coach will talk to the prof about "creative grading."

When I was an undergrad, every student had to take a philosophy class. I took "Modern Philosophy." assuming that it would be, like, modern. Nope, it was about Kant, Hume, and Berkeley (pronounced Barkeley; that's the only thing I remember from the class).

BFF Dexter gawks at them: "Jocks -- so pretty, so entitled."

"Aren't you above stereotypes?"

"Girl, I'm beneath stereotypes." He takes another look at Beau. "Maybe behind." This will become important for shipping later.

Hannah got an A, but tells BFF Dexter that her grade was "not good." Hockey Star Garrett looks over her shoulder and exclaims "You aced it!" This angers Hannah, for some reason. You forgot to complain that "He's arrogant!"

Scene 3: On the way out, BFF Dexter points out bad-boy music major Justin Kohl (Josh Heuston, n*de on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends), Hannah's crush Their third friend joins them and asked if Hannah has made a move yet. "He doesn't know who I am. Am I supposed to fling myself at him?" "Yes!!!"

Hockey Star Garrett joins them. After they criticize him for being rich and goodlooking, he tells Hannah that he's failing the class, and wants her help on the next assignment, n oral presentation. "Nope." Why not? Just because he's arrogant?

"But you owe me for the sneak peek. Tons of girls would have paid for that view." What about guys, heteronormative jerk?

Scene 4: Hannah leaves them to bike across the campus of Briar University (actually the University of British Columbia). She stops at Kaufman Center, where Professor Daveed (Brandon Scott, left), is conducting the student orchestra. He glares at her for being late.

After class tells her that her scholarship for the year has been cut. Not because she was late, because the government thinks that the fine arts are useless.

"But this is the third week of the semester! My only hope of staying in school is to get another scholarship!"

There aren't any other classical music composition scholarships, but what if she changes her major to performance? Nope, she's a lousy clarinet player.

So what about pop music composition? Lots of scholarships there, given out at the Pop Music Showcase

"I can write pop music. How hard can it be?" Famous last words.

Scene 5: The frat house. The guys, Tucker, Dean, and Logan (Jalen Thomas Brooks, Stephen Kalyn, Antonio Cipriano) are bickering as they prepare for the party tonight. There are shirtless shots and discussions of cooking.

Hockey Star Garrett comes in later, when the party is already going on. Tucker is cooking "dippables." Dean is kissing a girl. Other party guests are playing video games and...chess? I thought frat parties were all beer pong and hetero bedroom stuff.

They criticize Hockey Star Garrett's taste in music -- it's old-fashioned, from the 1990s. So he's a pop music fan. Maybe he and Hannah can help each other.

Meanwhile, at Malone's, Bad Boy Justin and his band are performing, while Hannah, working the bar, is having a fantasy about him. Her friend asks what she's going to compose for the Pop Showcase: "Taylor Swift or Lady Gaga?"

"I'm more Taylor."

"So be Taylor, and go talk to your crush, Bad Boy Justin."

He's singing "A little less talking, a little more 'touch me," which is basically what Olivia Newton John sang in "Physical," and Julie Andrews in My Fair Lady.

Never do I ever want to hear another word
There isn't one I haven't heard
Here we are together in what ought to be a dream
Say one more word and I'll scream

"Nope, I'm too scared."

"Ok, then. Everybody is going to the Block Party tomorrow. You can talk to him then." They have block parties at universities?

More after the break

Scene 6: Hockey Star Garrett doing stuff with a girl juxtaposed with Hannah at home, working on her song.). Afterwards she announces "I want to be your girlfriend."

Garrett is confused. "What for?" Then. "Oh...sorry, I'm not into romance."

She stomps out, and he checks his cell phone.

Cut to the aftermath of the frat party: beer bottles, a chess set, Dean sleeping with his girl. Logan and Hockey Star Graham work out Dean and Tucker join them.. Close-ups of chests and biceps.

Then they discuss the "I want to be your girlfriend." "WTF? We've been doing stuff for a few weeks, and all of a sudden she wants a commitment! How crazy is that?"

Uh-oh, Garrett's Dad texts him. "You can't ignore me forever." That's something a stalker would say.

"Dad's an a-hole," he explains. "All he cares about is hockey. He's a hockey legend, and he's pushing me to follow in his footsteps."

"We play hockey because we love it, right?"

"Um...yeah, right...sure." Uh-oh, he's not into it.

Scene 7: Hannah working on her song. She has the melody, but no lyrics. OMG, the roommate takes off her top, then spins around so the viewers can gawk at her lady parts. I thought this was a beefcake-only show.

Besides, I'm getting bored.

On RG Beefcake and Boyfriends: there are lots of c*cks on display in the scene where Hannah bursts into the locker room.

I'm fast forwarding to BFF Dexter's next appearance, at the Block Party (aka carnival). He, the other friend, and Sean McCall (Riley Davis) are watching Hannah use Hocky Star Garrett to get her crush jealous. He says "Awww."

They're standidng close together, but I don't think they're on a date. Sean has a girlfriend. Is that all BFF Dexter does? Cheer Hannah's romance?

I fast forwarded through every episode -- which means sitting through ALL of the commercial breaks

In Episode 3, Dexter plays Puck in a improv version of Midsummer Night's Dream, and drafts four people from the audience to play the four mix-and-match mortals: Hannah, Bad Boy Justin, Hockey Star Garrett, and his "I want to be your girlfriend" girl, So the queer dude gets to orchestrate heterosexual romance, but cannot have a romance of his own.

One fan is shipping Dexter and Beau, who he gawked at in Scene 2 (right and below), because they're shown sitting together at the big Pop Showcase But they never interact at other times, and Beau has a girlfriend.

Beefcake: A lot of chests, backsides, and c*cks.

LGBTQ Characters: Dexter, plus Logan has a nonbinary younger sibling (behind Dexter).

Heterosexism: Two main hetero romances, with a lot of kissing.

My Grade: I liked the frat boys, not the usual dumb-jock alpha dudes; but once Hannah starts hanging out with them, why couldn't Dexter join the friend group? Why does the gay guy always have to be a perpetual outsider, looking in on the world and exclaiming, like Puck, "What fools these mortals be!"

I guess an outsider gay-best-friend is better than heterosexist erasure (I'm looking at you, Boroughs), and the backsides and c*cks were a nice touch, but I still found Off Campus rather dull. Hannah and Garrett will end up together. Why should I care how they get there?