"Take My Muffin": A manipulative three-eyed cat befriends an amnesiac unicorn. With some d*cks and a controversial gay twunk

Link to the n*de dudes and unicorn d*ck

A "new" adult animated tv series, Take My Muffin, popped up on Amazon.  It stars Michael Doherty, "just your average controversial gay twunk and comedian," so I'm hoping there's some queer content. Episode 1: "Hallucinogenic Buggers, The Internet 2.0, The Waternet."

Scene 1: A highway on a dark rainy night.  A n*ked anthropomorphic unicorn (Dane McMichael) trudges. Notice the multicolored p*nis. Drivers yell at him.  A truck zooms up and...

He awakens in a hospital bed.  Rok (Michael Doherty), a three-eyed cat, introduces himself as a "hot nurse" and wants a sample.  He doesn't remember how he got there, so Rock pulls up a Deathwatch podcast with his accident. He's "h*ng like a unicorn," but has no identification, so they don't know who he is. Ergo the sample for a DNA test.

Scene 2: Uh-oh, two baddies are destroying the hallway, looking for "that qu*f-sniffing unicorn," so Rokk helps him escape by shoving a thermometer up the backside of a patient (to resemble a unicorn horn) and pushing them out the window.  They zoom off in an ambulance, with the bad guys following and shooting.  They trick them into zooming onto a barge in the river, and drive off.

A random d*ck on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends.

Scene 3: Rok brings the Unicorn to his place to hide out, and maybe get his memory back.  You're being awfully nice to him.  Are you into unicorn horns?

He introduces his housemates: 

Finance Lawyer Draka, a red-haired female demon, yelling because the bank closed their account.

Security guard Mojo, a giant potato getting high on a pink gas.

Office admin support bot, UD (stands for Unending Depression)

Design engineer Dr. Noper, a green being with two horns.

And they'll call the unicorn Korny until he remembers his real name.

Actually, Rok is just a volunteer nurse, like a Candy Striper.  He and his crew are staring a new NPO, and they're meeting with the potential investors in one minute.  Ulp, with all escaping-from-bad-guys drama, he forgot to prepare a presentation.

Scene 4: The investors, a pig, a leprechaun, and a superhero lady, appear on hologram.  His presentation: the Internet today is a laughably outdated, impossibly complex load of crap, the "B*ner of Babel." He wants to start the Internet 2.0, but doesn't have any more details.

Leprechaun: "Your glibly-scribbled gibberish is dead in the water."

Upon hearing "dead in the water," Korny thinks of something, and his horn starts to glow and chime.  He jumps up from his wheelchair, displaying his junk to the investors, and exclaims "Water!" 

Water is spread all over the world, like a single wi-fi network, and has a binary nature, made of hydrogen and oxygen atoms.  We can create the Internet 2.0 from water. 

"Ok, we'll discuss pre-seed investments at our next meeting.  Bring a KPI (Key Performance Indicators) report.

More after the break

Researching Brothers Neo and Swan, French youtube, comic book, and tv stars. With celebrity scandal, a gay kid, and n*de dudes from Les Eyzies

Link to the n*de dudes

Yesterday I researched San Diego Pooth because of his unusual name, and ended up with a celebrity kid, famous in Germany, plus an opportunity to use my college German. 

Today it's French

In case you're keeping track, I was an English and Modern Languages major, so I studied Spanish, French, German, Latin, and a little Greek and Russian.  French is my favorite language, maybe because there is so much queer content in the bandes dessinées: Tintin and Captain Haddock, Alix and Enak, Corentin and Kim, Spirou and Fantasio.

So when Néo the One, a 21-year old gars from Bordeaux, popped up on my recommendations, I started research even though I never heard of him.  Turns out that he's got 778,000 Instagram followers. 

Néo the One posts mostly beefcake and family photos.  Here he's doing sit-ups in the snow, in three different pairs of pants.

But being exceptionally hot is not enough to get 778,000 followers.  He must be famous for something else.

Néo's younger brother, Swan the Voice, age 15, has 668,000 Instagram followers.  They also have a Sweo Shop where you can buy clothing "made with fun." 

Left: At a Halloween party, they're dressed as superheroes Homelander and Soldier Boy from The Boys, who happen to be s*x partners.  

Their main claim to fame is a Youtube channel with seven million subscribers.  

Some of the videos are in French:

Ne jamais passer des dumplings en classe! (Never boil dumplings in class).

J'ai volé les Noveaux Brainrots! (I stole the new brainrots) 

Un diner presque parfait (An almost perfect dinner).

Some are in Franglais:

Live Piscine (swimming pool) Chill

Some  are in English:

"Eat 100 years of candy"

"Who is the murderer in our villa?"

"I built a secret swimming pool in my room."

Swan & Neo Brothers, an animated tv series, premiered in 2022.  52 episodes have aired to date, dubbed in many languages, including Albanian, Finnish, Hebrew, and Thai.

On RG Beefcake and Boyfriends: A n*de guy from Bordeaux, in case I can't find any of Neo.

More after the break

Researching Diego Pooth. The name alone was worth the trip. With a Plattdeutsch dude, a Big Brother backside, and two Diego d*cks

  

Link to the n*de dudes

Someone named "San Diego Pooth" showed up in my recommedations.  I thought "That can't be his real name."  Poof is an old homophobic slur.  With a lisp, it's Pooth, so a double slur.  And San Diego -- Nobody is named after the town they are born in.  Must be a San Diego-area drag queen resurrecting the old slurs for their camp value.

But San Diego Pooth doesn't have any drag photos on his Instagram.  He's flexing, modeling, golfing, or dancing with a lady named Ekaterina.

Holy Cow, he's a "public figure," with 129,000 followers, and he appears in a documentary called "Born Famous."

He posts in German, which may explain the Pooth.  It may not be a slur in Germany.

Google AI says that it's a Dutch and German name, from either the Middle Low German pot (pool) or pote (young scion). 

Low German or Plattdeutsch, spoken by 3-5 million people northern Germany and the Netherlands, is closer to Frisian and English than the Hochdeutsch that most American kids learned in school.  I actually learned  Plattdeutsch, so to this day I want to pronounce "Ich" with a hard K, Eek, instead of Eesch.

Left: Plattdeutsch dude from Flensburg, as far north as you can go in Germany without hitting Denmark.

English: Come to my room

Standard German: Kommst Du in mein Zimmer

Plattdeutsch: Kumm na mien Stuuv

English: I have a big sausage

Standard Germann: Ich habe eine grosse Wurst

Plattdeutsch: Ich heff i groot Wuss

Google knows all about San Diego Pooth.  He's 23 years old as of this writing, 6'2" or 6'6", son of the ultra famous Veronica Pooth and her husband Franjo.  I never heard of them, either.

Veronica is from La Paz, Bolivia, which explains the "San Diego":  Juan Diego Cuauhtlatoatzin (1474-1548), a Nahua peasant who had visions of the Virgin Mary, became the first indigenous person to be canonized as a saint by the Roman Catholic Church -- in 2002.  Our San Diego was born in 2003.

Mom Veronica grew up in Hamburg, and won several beauty contests, including Miss Germany. Her IMDB profile shows her stufff.  I didn't think that was allowed. 

She appears as "herself" in 121 tv shows, beginning with The Disney Club and 12 Stunden über den Dächern von Köln (Twelve Hours Above the Rooftops of Cologne).  The most popular seem to be Peep, Big Brother...

A contestant on Big Brother Germany  is on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends.

Star Duell, Menschen (I'd watch that), Extreme Activity, Das Star-Magazin,. Ein Herz für Kinder (a fundraiser), and Villa der Versuchung (Temptation Villa).

She also has 13 acting credits, and owns several jewelry and cosmetic brands, including Veronas Dreams and So Perfect.

Veronica married her second husband, Franjo Pooth, in 2004.  They have two chldren, San Diego and Rocco Ernesto.

Franjo is the son of famous architect Franz-Josef Pooth (the shortened form, get it?).  He studied architecture in London, then founded several companies, notably Maxfield, which Wikipedia says designs MP3 players and "trend-oriented electronic devices."  

He was Maxfield's CEO from 2003 until 2008, when he was convicted of corruption and bribery and forced to step down.  Later Franjo and Veronica founded Pacific Healthcare, which sells CBD-infused cosmetics and dietary supplements.

More after the break

D*ng!: Dysfunctional Asian-American family, with Andrew Law as a gay brother. Gen Z humor, gross-out jokes, cute gay guys, and Brian Jordan Alvarez..

  

The ultra-Puritans put this behind a s*nsitive warning again. For the life of me, I could not figure out why, except that they disapprove of the title of the tv series, which is itself a euphemism for d*mn.  Surely they're not that picky?  Even when I was a kid, we could say d*ng.

Link to the not fully clothed photos

I've been looking forward to the animated D*ng!, about dysfunctional Asian-American siblings, wiith some trepidation.  In one of the scenes in the trailer, Andrew D*ng struggles to say something to a burly Hispanic dude in a bodega, knocks over a display, says "I love you!" and leaves in embarrassment.  Sounds like he's gay, but in another scene, he's knocking over furniture in enthusiastic kissing and hugging with a woman, so I'm not sure.  I've been fooled by queerbaiting trailers before.

But it stars Andrew Law, the showrunner of The Family Law, about a Chinese-Australian boy coming out, so we'll give it a try.

Scene 1: Boardroom at the XY Deadstock Company.  Andrew calls a meeting with his disengaged, phone-scrolling "gr*ndset alpha" employees.  His co-owner fires him because "every day you spend hours in the bathroom, eavesdropping on your own employees and tweeting their conversations."

"Can't fire me if you can't catch me!" He runs away in a panic, chased by security guards in a parody of those zany movie chases. One expects to hear "Yackety Sax" in the background.  He runs into Lucille,  Head of HR, who hands him the termination papers.

Scene 2: A purple-haired woman is livestreaming her (censored) videos, accumulating coins. If she gets enough, she promises marble rye. Andrew comes and gets yelled at for interrupting. She notes that she's only doing this until she lands the job at (censored), Kate Hudson's lip gloss newsletter. 

Andrew being fired will be a major inconvenience, since he pays for all her stuff. "Go back and fight for your job."

Scene 3: Andrew begs the Co-Owner to give him his job back.  "We're a world-changing company!" "We let teens resell their (censored) for $6,000.  And you don't do anything."  Who would spend that much on a used (censored)?  

"My lawyer and I will see you in court!"

"Isn't that just a guy you dated?"  

"We only dated once, and it was mostly (censored)."

Gay identity established at Minute 5.00, but what about the enthusiastic girl-kissing?  Maybe it's bi identity.

Scene 4: Lawyer tells Andrew that they have two options: Prove that the Bathroom Twitter account wasn't his.   "Nope, it was mine."  Ok, prove that he was wrongfully terminated.   His older sister Ruthie texts, so he runs away.

The IMDB and the closing credits don't reveal which actor plays which character, so all I know is that Brian Jordan Alvarez and Jared Goldstein (not fully clothed on RG Beefcake and Boyfriends) are in the cast Also Adam Palley (below).

Cut to (censored), where Purple-Haired Sister is waiting for her internship interview.  The receptionist offers several wacky perks, like a cranial massage, bone marrow broth, and a rude therapist: "A gay guy who agrees with everything you say, but goes too far."

She's interviewed by a young teen girl who puts rose quartz in her coffee.  They're ready to hire her, when Andrew appears, gesturing wildly.   "Our Sister Ruthie is in town, and she wants to...ugh...grab dinner!" 

"Don't panic.  We can avoid her until she leaves."

Scene 5: They run back to their apartment to grab some essentials and hide, but she's in the house!  She explains that she's moving to town for her very important, very successful job, so she'll be able to evaluate their tech business and muffin shop. 

The siblings don't have either of those careers!  "When Little Miss Perfect finds out, she'll be sooo annoying!"

Purple-Hair has another interview at (censored), so Andrew is in charge of entertaining their sister for the day. She interviews with Kate, who is trying "interminable fasting" and doesn't know what "Cornell" means.

More after the break