This is a series of memes -- jokes -- featuring Kelvin and Keefe of The Righteous Gemstones during their breakup, and a few random hunks. Most don't require you to have any background knowledge of the show.
Keefe: Daddy Eli is taking me fishing next week.
Keefe: No. He's a muppet.
1. Which Gemstone gets him as a birthday present?
Keefe: BJ and I play pickleball on my lunch hour three times a week.
Kelvin: Well, I meant...
Keefe: Judy took me jewelry shopping yesterday.
Kelvin: She was just being nice...
Keefe: Jesse and Amber had me over for dinner last Saturday.
Kelvin: They never invite me over for dinner....
Keefe: Daddy Eli is taking me fishing next week.
Kelvin: Since when do you call him...
Keefe: Gideon invited me to a movie.
Kelvin: Dude, that's my nephew! Are you guys...
Keefe: Martin's kid has a music recital, and he asked me to...
Kelvin: Now you're just showing off.
Jesse: I shouldn't have given them my monster truck.
Amber: Support Jesse in everything, no matter how stupid, or you'll end up alone, like Kelvin.
Kelvin: Leave his ring on or take it off? If I leave it on, guys will think I'm still marr..engag...a dude bro
Kelvin: Daddy said "No more workplace romances. They always blow up in your face." Well, this time I hired an assistant who I do not find attractive in the least! Taryn is nice and all, but no way would I...she's a fierce tumbler....and she's got a quirkly fashion sense...I love her laugh. We have to discuss the youth ministry, right? Why not over dinner at Luigi's?
5. Bi Boy from Barcelona
Kelvin: I'm going on my first date since Keefe and I broke up. Any advice?
Jesse: Stay focused. Don't talke about cum. Tell him who the fuck you are.
Keefe dating after the break-up after the break
Robert Oberst said the same thing on his instagram.
9. Random Robert Oberst
Keefe: We were broken up. I thought you were dating Taryn. So when Joe Jonas introduced us, I asked him out. But I swear, I would never have invited you here tonight if I knew he was the headliner.
Kelvin: Did you have physical relations?
Keefe: No. He's a muppet.
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