"Loaded": Overloaded, but With a Gay Romance

Loaded, on Netflix, is an 8-episode Britcom about four techies who suddenly become "loaded" after the iphone cat game they developed goes viral. Although they have apparently been friends for years, they have quite disparate personalities.

1. New Agey, "Everything happens for a reason" Leon (Samuel Anderson,).

2. Level-headed focus character Josh (Jim Howick).

3. Dazed, chubby, multi-tattooed Watto (Nick Helm)

4. Neurotic, afraid-of-everything Ewan (Johnny Sweet, below)

They spend the first episode driving around to insult everyone who didn't believe in them, and gifting Josh's parents with a totally inappropriate 3-month long tour of places of cultural significance around the world (like Uganda and Yemen).

Back at the office to deal with a glitch, Josh explains to an employee why his picture isn't on the advertising materials (not photogenic).  She obviously has a crush on him, but he is oblivious.

Neurotic and oblivious to girls?  I wonder if he's gay
I skip forward to Episode 5. "The Boat," because it says that Ewan has a crush on The Chef, without stating whether The Chef is male or female.

Scene 1:  The guys in their old caravan (trailer), where they do their best work.  Leon tries to get them to focus on their new game, while they are all distracted by rich-person pastimes.

Scene 2: Josh and his girlfriend having dinner.   He asks her to do something rich this weekend, but she's busy -- she has a job.  Anyway, he's supposed to be working on the game, right?

Scene 3: Establishing shot of London (for once, Tower Bridge instead of that darn ferris wheel).  Leon tells his boss that the game development is going great. Good, because she's planning a massively publicized announcment "on the main stage, right after the Angry Birds guys."  She lends him her assistant, Naomi.

Scene 4: Naomi talks Leon into buying a gigantic yacht so the guys can work without distractions.

Scene 5: The guys and Naomi board the yacht.  We meet the surly captain, Callum (Oliver Johnstone),  who insults Ewan for carrying a poofy pink pillow.

Scene 6:  They try to work, but keep getting distracted.  Ewan acts weird around Captain Callum,  They ask what he was doing; he replies that he was flirting.  They suggest a better approach.

Score! Ewan is gay!

Wait -- Callum is The Chef?  They hired someone to cook, but no one to drive the boat?

Scene 7:  Ewan goes down to the galley and tries to flirt again.This time Callum gets the idea,and they kiss.

Score!  A kissing scene!

Scene 8: The boss phones Naomi to get the dirt on what's going on.  Are they really working, or goofing around? Can she send a copy of whatever they have so far?

Scene 9:  The girl from the yacht next door arrives and reveals that the last owner killed his wife and himself here.  Weird -- I thought this episode was about being distracted from working.

Wait -- the heirs didn't throw out the blood-splattered sofa before selling the yacht?

Scene 10: Cut to Ewan and Chef Callum getting dressed after sex in the galley (nice chest shots).  Whoops -- Chef Callum thinks that Ewan is a fellow employee.  He hates the rich!  So Ewan, of course, lies.

Scene 11:  The guys discover that Naomi came on board to spy on them. Ewan pretends to be their valet.

Scene 12: In the kitchen, Chef Callum advises Ewan that he shouldn't let them belittle him.   He demonstrates the "spitting in the salad" trick, but notes that he just spits, he doesn't wank into their food like other chefs.

Scene 13: Naomi has gone over to the guys' side.  She tells the boss that the game is finished, and brilliant.

Scene 14: Subplot involving Josh's girlfriend cheating on him. This is getting a little long.  Callum and Ewan serve dinner.

Scene 15: Subplot involving Watto's mum.  What about the murder-suicide?

Scene 16:  Hokey smokes, not more subplots about Naomi being interested in Josh and Leon spiking Watto's drink with LSD?  I've got other things to do today.

Scene 17:  Ewan tells Chef Callum the truth.  He explains that the money didn't make him a twat;he was already a twat when he got rich.

Scene 18: More stuff happens.  I'm going to just fast-forward to the Callum-Ewan plotline.

Callum acts all bitchy to Ewan.  Leon intervenes: he's a great guy, you should give him a chance.

They have a heart to heart.  Ewan reveals that having money changes you, even if you don't want it to, and the worst part is, you don't realize that you've changed.  Callum invites him to a pub.  But they're stuck offshore, and Watto took the only lifeboat.  Not to worry -- they take off their shoes and jump off the ship.

They're going to go to a pub soaking wet, without shoes?

My verdict:   I liked Ewan getting a boyfriend, and everyone else being so nonchalant about it. (Callum appears in a  later episode as well). But there were so many other subplots running around, some thrown in for no reason, that I got bored. Nor was there an overall theme to draw things together.  A tight 23 minutes would be better. Just save the Naomi, mother, LSD, and murder-suicide bits for later, and do an episode with just Ewan-Callum-hate the rich.  Add a few more humorous scenes of Ewan pretending to be a servant, maybe with the guys helping out: "Ok, Valet, iron my trousers."

When a viewer can come up with a better episode than the professional writers, you know somethig is wrong.

My grade: C+

Tony Dow Beefcake, Part 1: The "Leave It to Beaver" big brother, gay subtexts, and boys

I was born too late to catch the first generation of Boomer sitcoms -- Ozzie and Harriet, Father Knows Best, Donna Reed, Leave It to Beaver -- and the teen idols they created -- Ricky Nelson, Billy Gray, Paul Peterson, Tony Dow.  But the gay kids who were old enough had a hunkfest, especially with Tony Dow of Beaver (1957-63).  Hired at age 12 to play older brother Wally and offer sage advice to the rapscalion Beaver (Jerry Mathers),


Tony blossomed into a dreamboat by around the third season, and while network censorship kept him under wraps, wearing nothing more revealing than a sleeveless t-shirt, the teen magazines were privy to dozens of shirtless pinups.

And dozens and dozens.  They just keep coming, all through the late 1950s and early 1960s.  Tony was already a Junior Olympics diver when hired, and his muscles grew bigger every year.

Wally didn't do a lot of male bonding; most of the homoromantic subtext comes from Beaver and his friend Gilbert.

After Beaver, Tony  -- or rather, his biceps -- landed a starring role on the teen soap Never Too Young (1965-66).  After so many years of censorship, Tony must have been surprised to discover that his character was to be shirtless or semi-nude in every scene, even at a fancy dinner party. Tommy Rettig of Lassie played his buddy JoJo.

A rather fascinating career followed, as actor, writer, and director.  Tony was active in the hippie counterculture and appeared in the underground classic,  Kentucky Fried Move (1977).  He reprised his role of Wally in Still the Beaver (1985-89).  He parodied Wally  innumerable times.  He is also an accomplished sculptor, with a piece on exhibit in the Louvre in 2008.

See also: Tony Dow Beefcake, Part 2

Tony Dow stars in the teen soap "Never Too Young"

Desi Arnaz, Jr.

Desi Arnaz, Jr. was born on January 19th, 1953, in the middle of a whirlwind of publicity, the child of most famous couple on television, Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz, and also the first baby ever "born" on tv (Lucy's real life pregnancy was incorporated into the plot of I Love Lucy).  He was on the cover of the first issue of TV Guide, on April 3rd, 1953.

Growing up with that kind of publicity, and his parents' connections, he had little choice but to go into show business.  In 1965, he started a boy band with his friends Dean Paul Martin (Dean Martin's son) and Billy Hinsche.

He guest starred on The Lucy Show (1962-65), and became a regular on Here's Lucy (1968-72), as Lucy's teenage son Craig. And he landed roles in lots of movies.

Oddly for the son of a comedy legend, Desi didn't do comedies.  He specialized in tear-jerkers. Many were about the tragic consequences of boys and girls who fall in love (Mr. and Mrs. Bo Jo Jones, She Lives, Having Babies, Black Market Babies).  

Others were gay-subtext movies about the tragic consequences of boys who fall in love with boys (Billy Two Hats, Joyride, To Kill a Cop).  

In 1983, he starred in a buddy-bonding series, Automan, about a computer whiz (Desi) who creates a computerized superhero (the hunky Chuck Wagner).  Unfortunately, it was promoted as a comedy, and Desi didn't do comedy.  He thought it would be a gritty urban drama.

After 13 episodes he left, and hasn't done a lot of acting since.  He is still involved with his music, and he owns the Boulder Theater in Boulder City, Nevada.

Although he was the subject of many gay rumors during the 1970s (my friend Cesar claimed to have hooked up with him), Desi was linked to several women, including Liza Minnelli, and he was married to Amy Arnaz from 1987 to her death in 2015.

See: Cesar Tells about his Hookup with Desi Arnaz Jr.


   

The Gay Guys of "The Trailer Park Boys:The Animated Series"

I've been watching the Canadian mockumentary Trailer Park Boys, about a trio of small-time hoods living in a run-down trailer park in Halifax, for what seems like forever (and in fact the first episode aired in April 2001): twelve seasons, three movies, three tv specials with the guys performing to live audiences, a spin off series that sends them to the United States.

I've seen the guys age from their 20s to their 50s, with few changes:
1. Julian (John Paul Tremblay) has managed to maintain his bodybuilder physique, and still has a full shot glass in his hand at all times but never actually drinks from it.
2. Bubbles (Mike Smith) is still living in that storage shed with cats.
3. Ricky (Robb Wells),  who constantly hatches crazy money-making schemes, has become a father, then a grandfather.

Corey and Jacob (Corey Bowles, Jacob Rolfe) still act like a gay couple, even though Jacob dated and then married Ricky's daughter Trinity.

Randy (Patrick Roach, top photo), the assistant camp manager, probably changed the most.  He began as closeted, keeping his relationship with  Mr. Lahey (John Dunsworth) a secret; he came out as bisexual, then as gay, and finally he and Mr. Lahey were married.  Don't worry, he still never wears a shirt.

I was wondering why they launched a spin-off animated series.  Were the actors getting too old to believably play Trailer Park Boys?  Did they want to do things that would be difficult to stage in live action?

I soon found out.  The first episode involves Corey getting his arm torn off and Jacob getting his head twisted backwards.

Don't worry, every episode doesn't involve amputated body parts.  They do other things that would be difficult to stage:  destroy downtown Halifax; host a concert for  thousands of people; fly into space; reminisce about their childhoods, when they all met over contraband hashish.

Mr. Lahey is carried off by a "shit hawk," leaving Randy a widower (John Dunsworth died in 2017). But he still appears out of bottles of liquor to offer advice and tell Randy that he loves him.

Gay people made the park denizens uncomfortable on the live-action series, but here they are met with nonchalance (in spite of Bubbles' incessant use of the term "cocksucker").

Julian signs up to play in a movie, without realizing that it's gay porn.  He tries to do it anyway,but finds it too uncomfortable, so he recruits Randy.

 Julian tries to make money with a car wash featuring girls in bikinis, but soon realizes that if he takes his shirt off, the car wash will draw a lot of well-tipping gay men.  Ricky meanwhile charges them to use his makeshift swimming pool.  His girlfriend is upset, asking "Are you gay now?"

"No.  What's the problem?  They're perfect customers," Ricky responds.  Then, when she continues to push, "Ok, you got me, I'm gay again."

Bubbles also assumes that Julian and Ricky are gay, and assures the news crew "I love the LGBT community.  I'm glad they finally came out."

Meanwhile Randy is peering through binoculars, making comments like "Perfect chest!"  The camera pans out, and we see that he's looking at Julian!

Wait -- what's the joke?  The audience knows that Randy is gay -- who else would he be looking at?

Mixed messages.  Business as usual at Sunnyvale Trailer Park.
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See also:Trailer Park Boys