The Top 10 Hunks of Queerbaiting TV, Part 1: a 2012 gay video star, an alien from the 53rd century, a cucumber, Jack McBrayer, and Oscar Wilde

 

 I've been having bad luck with tv shows lately.  

1. I fast-forwarded through 14 episodes of Insecure, on Netflix, about two black women looking for love and sex, because it had a gay character, Ahmal, played by Jean Eli.  He was interviewed extensively about what it felt like to play a gay character, how he tried to subvert stereotypes, and so on.  Dude appeared for only a few seconds in each episode, when his sister called to ask his advice on something, or when she brought him as her date to a party.  He is shown with a man just once, cooking, for three seconds.

That's not queerbaiting, it's "gay but let's not admit it" erasure.

2. But at least there were a lot of hot black guys who showed their backsides as they got down with the ladies, such as Jay Ellis.

3. And Y'Lan Noel

I've been watching the tenth series of Doctor Who (2016-17) under the impression that the Time Lord's  companion Nardole is gay. First, actor Matt Lucas is gay.  Second, he's  sassy and snippy, he's dismissive of female companion Bill, he hides in another alien's crotch, and he acts like he's quite smitten with this blue-skinned fellow.

4.It took a lot of research to find the identity of the blue-skinned guy -- IMBD didn't know, and Google thought he was 2012-13 gay video star Justin LeBeau

 5. The Tardis Fandom website calls him Dahh-Ren, played by Peter Caulfield, who gets n*de on the gay British series Cucumber 

But Nardole's interest in Dahh-Ren is just a tease. Later in the episode, he mentions an old girlfriend.

Doctor Who often features gay characters.  Bill is herself a lesbian, and has fallen for women twice so far.  So why the queerbaiting?

More after the break

6. How about this one: Togetherness (2015-2016), on Hulu. Uptight Brett (Mark Duplass, right) takes in his buddy, struggling actor Alex. Meanwhile, his wife takes in her recently dumped sister Tina.  The Season 1 synopses give no suggestion that Alex falls in love with Tina, or with any woman.  Surely he is gay, right?

No, in Season 2 he gets a girlfriend.  

7. Then I started the movie You're Cordially Invited, about two heterosexual weddings booking same venue,with Father of the Bride Will Farrell falling in love with the sister of the rival bride, because of this fashion-conscious, limp-wristed fellow.  But it's just a gay tease -- he's one of the grooms, played by Icelandic rapper Stony Blyton.

8. There's a gay-vague hotel clerk played by Jack McBrayer, but he doesn't get a plot arc.

And Jack McBrayer isns't even gay in real life, although he does voice Beef's pe nis in an episode of The Great North.

His best-known character, NBC page Kenneth Parcell on 3D Rock, isn't gay, either: he is characterized as "mostly asexual."

Speaking of Amazon Prime, how's this for a gay tease: a gay couple in old-timey costumes.

Only when you blow it up can you see that the old guy is expressing hatred, not romantic desire.  

9. It is the Britcom Bleak Old Shop of Stuff (2012-13), a parody of Charles Dickens' Old Curiosity Shop.  This one sells paranormal artifacts, and is run by "devoted family man" Jedrington Secret-Past (Robert Webb, left, who has guested in everything from Eastenders to Doctor Who).

 Ugh, heterosexualized in the first senence.

10. The hater is an evil lawyer, Malifax Skulkingworm. played by perennial cheeky Brit Sir Stephen Fry.

Sir Stephen usually plays cheeky hetero-horny characters, but he played Oscar Wilde in 1997, with Jude Law as Bosie.

At least we got some beefcake out of the research.

See also:

Cucumber: Lots of d*cks on display as gay life in Manchester gets increasingly dark

"The Third Day": Jude Law in "The Wicker Man," with scissor goblins, a dead son, Will Rogers, and Dagliesh d*cks

Doctor Who, 2005 Series: Hints, subtexts, surprises

Researching Justin LeBeau: From "Doctor Who" to gay videos, just physiques and pe nises