Jan 7, 2022

"Rebelde": Lies and Secrets at an Elite Private School, Yet Again


 I'm still sick, so the reviews are coming fast and furious.  Next up: Rebelde (Rebel), which started life in 2004  as a Mexican teen telenovela about students in an exclusive music school (so, basically the premise of every teen drama).   None of the students were gay, but one of the actors came out later.  Then RBD, the pop group started by the kids in the tv series, started performing internationally, selling 250 million albums before folding in 2009.   

Now a reboot is streaming on Netflix.  Will it be able to make a dent in the overcrowded "teens at private school" market?  More importantly, did they update the cast by making someone gay?

Scene 1:  A girl and her brother or boyfriend are dragged out of their house in the middle of the night.  It's a hazing!  

Scene 2: A few hours before.  A teenage Pop Star is working in her recording studio.  Her mother comes in to ask her to choose a photo for the magazine profile.  But she's not doing pop anymore; she's going to a real music school, to study real music. So -- classical cello?   Mom disapproves: "What about the 56 concerts you have coming up, and the 16 new albums you're scheduled to record?  After all I've sacrificed to get us to the top, you're going to throw it all away on a prep school?"

Scene 3: Social Influencer Luka (Franco Mazini, top photo), who is wearing a fur coat in a tropical climate, talking to his fans from "the DF."  His rich, neglectful Dad points out that no one calls it that; it's Mexico City.  Dad wants him to enroll in a business school, but no, it will be music.  They argue: "You were never there for me, yada yada yada."


Scene 4:
Working -class Esteban (Sergio Mayer Mori, left) dropped off at the prestigious private school.  Dad's pickup truck looks out of place amid the rich people's cars.  He asks "Are you sure about this?  You could still go tothe conservatory.  You're a young Mozart, not Justin Beeper." Wait -- I thought this prep school taught serious music for young Mozarts.  But at least there's one parent who's not manipulative or abusive.



Meanwhile, Blond Kid (Jeronimo Cantilo)  drags his stuff in, arguming with his mother.  She calls him Guillermo, but he insists that his name is Dixon.  They hug.  

Rounding out the cast are a Wild Child, a Mean Girl (complete with a swishy gay-stereotype crony), and a Ditzy Girl who is from California and doesn't speak Spanish well. 

Scene 5: The principal says "Welcome" in Portuguese for some reason, and then switches to English.  "We like everything in English here.  It sounds more sophisticated."   You arrive her thinking you're super-talented, and go home in tears within a month.  "You got big dreams?  You want fame?  Well, fame costs.  And here's where you start paying.  In sweat! " Sorry, wrong show.

Working-Class Esteban approaches Social Influencer Luka, and is rebuffed.  The one nice guy among these entitled, bitchy, arrogant snobs.  Could he be gay?

Scene 6: The principal continues: Threre's a special Music Excellence Program (MEP), where students will prepare for the Battle of the Bands, the biggest event at the school.  It doesn't sound like they'll be playing Mozart.


Scene 7:
Working Class Esteban stares longingly at the Pop Star as she plays the piano.  They flirt  He figures he's going to get a rich-and-famous girlfriend on his first day at school.  But the minute they get out into the hallway, Pop Star  starts swallowing the tongue of another guy, and having him lick her lips (that's a thing in Mexico): her regular boyfriend Sebe (Alejandro Puente).  So that's why she chose this school. 

 Esteban has no choice but to move on, fuming about the tease. 

The dorm mother assigns rooms, and tells Pop Star not to expect preferential treatment. Boyfriend, either, even though his Dad is the mayor.  Mexico City doesn't have mayors, it has governors.  

Scene 8: Very nice dorm rooms, gigantic, very elegant, high ceilings.  Pop Star will be sharing with Wild Child and Ditzy Girl.

Scene 9: Blond Dixon is sharing with Working Class Esteban; he hids his special cufflinks so Esteban can't steal them.   Social Influencer Luka comes in, complaining: his rich Dad paid beaucoup pesos for him to get a single room.  Dorm Mother: "This isn't a hotel.  You're sharing."

Scene 10: Principal giving another speech.  In the audience, the students have already paired off into friendship dyads. Social Influencer Luka and Blond Dixon nudge each other.   Pop Star gazes back at Working Class Esteban, while her Boyfriend kisses her hair.

Scene 11: While waiting in line to sign up for auditions for the Music Program, Social Influencer Luka yells at Pop Star: "You tried to out me during your speech at my aunt's wedding last year!"  Oh boy, a gay character!  Of course, he's a jerk, but they're all jerks except for Working Class Esteban and Pop Star.  And there's no one in the cast for him to date, except Blond Dixon, and he's probably meant for the Wild Child or Ditzy Girl.

Pop Star has a meet-cute with Working Class Esteban (whom she has already met), who suggests that they rehearse for the auditon; "Music room, 9:15, after curfew?"  You dope, everyone will hear you!

Scene 12:  Biology Class. While the teacher tries to explain that academics are important, too, Mean Girl's swishy gay-stereotype crony criticizes  Blond Dixon for being Columbian: "Watch your phones and wallets."  

Scene 13:  Pop Star goes to the music room after curfew to flirt...um, I mean practice for the audition with Working Class Esteban.  he changed the key on one of her signature songs, and added an arpeggio.  

Boyfriend, in the hallway, overhears the music, and sees them flirting...um, I mean practicing.  I told you this was a bad idea!

Scene 14: The girls discussing how cute Esteban is. They don't notice the security camp over their head.  In dorm rooms?  That's got to be illegal!

Scene 15: The kidnapping/hazing.  Older students in animal masks bring the freshmen to the music room and yell at them for being untalented.  Social Influencer Luka points out that they are not really being kidnapped, so they can leave at any time.  The Animal Masks bully and threaten them into compliance: "We know all your secrets.  We can make terrible things happen to you!"  

The hazing involves dressing in the costumes of the previous RBD group and singing one of their songs.  Although it's impromptu, they've never played together before, and why would they know the words?, they do well.  

At that moment, the music room catches fire!  Not part of the hazing.  Everyone runs out, leaving the main cast trapped and about to die. The end.

Beefcake:  None.  When they are ordered to strip to put on the RBD costumes, the camera pans away.

Gay Characters: Obviously Luka.   But the Mean Girl's swishy gay-stereotype crony turns out to be straight -- and homophobic!  Rather a poor set of acting choices or directorial instructions!

Cliche Characters:  All of them.

My Grade: C.

PS: I went through the series on fast forward to see if Luka does any dating.  Nope.  But two girls start a romance during the last few episodes.

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