"The Bear": It took 3,430 f-words to realize that this wasn't about gay bears

The Bear, on Hulu (originally on FX): everyone knows that a bear is a hairy, chunky gay man.  Plus the icon for Episode 8 looks like two guys holding hands.  On close inspection, they are not, but still, they're quite chummy.  Is it a gay-themed series?  Searching for "The Bear" and "gay" of course yields 35,000,000 hits, so I'll have to review an episode to be sure.  I chose Episode 4, "Dogs," in which Carmy and Ritchie work together.

Intro: Someone's hands making donuts.  The promo said that this was a meat restaurant, "The Original Beef of Chicagoland." No, it's Roecker's Bakery.

Scene 1:  Behind the store, a slim bearded guy (Ebon Moss-Bachrach, left) is putting a t-shirt on a a giant inflated hot dog.  Curly-haired guy with ugly tattoos (Jeremy Allen White, below) asks why.  "Because fucking kids love fucking hot dogs, dumbass."  "I know, that's why we fucking sell fucking hot dogs."  "We're bringing this fucking hot dog to the fucking kid's party we are catering, so shut the fuck up, fucking dumb ass."  I doubt that these guys are boyfriends. About 300 "fucks" later, we get the gist: they borrowed money from a gangster, so they're catering the kid's party to avoid getting their legs broken.

They try to get the hot dog into their car, but it doesn't fit.  They begin cursing at each other (more) and throwing punches.  Not only are they not boyfriends, they actively hate each other.

Scene 2:  In the bakery, the Chef has prepared a new chocolate cake.  Sydney, a woman, tastes it and pronounces it "ok." He is thrilled.   Sydney asks another employee about the mashed potatoes (essential in a bakery), and is told to "I have been in this kitchen since before you were born, so fuck off." I'm getting nauseated from the "fucks," so I'll substitute f***."    

Scene 3: The hot dog guys on the highway.  Slim guy is laughing hysterically over a video in which "this f**ing guy tries to f** up a f***ing little nerd, and the f*** little nerd just f***ing washes him!  F***!"  I give up.  Just assume that 3/4ths of the dialogue consists of the F word.  Ugly Tattoo guy cautions him to not bring up the stuff about Cicero (a person, not the Chicago suburb.) Cut to Cicero and Slim Guy yelling at each other.  

Scene 4: As they set  up for the birthday party, an old guy approaches Ugly Tattoo -- Carmen.  "I thought  you killed yourself." "No, sir, that was my brother."  Slim guy -- Richie -- takes a pill for his anxiety.  He didn't bring ketchup because only f* assholes put ketchup on hot dogs.  He also wants to know why Carmen brought all this "gay-ass fruit."  

Not only are they not a romantic couple, they're f*** homophobes.  I'm out.

The producers must be so homophobic that they never heard of gay bears, so they didn't expect any confusion.  Or they don't care.

By the way, Richie gets top billing, and Carmen third.  Second billing goes to "Pete," played by Chris Witaske of the comedy series What Men Want.  I'm guessing the answer is "women."